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I don't see the light at the end of this tunnel.

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 I have spondylosis. (Link describing it.)Which basically is a severe osteo-arthritis of the spine.My back HURTS all the time.....What do I mean by hurts?! Throbbing,aching shooting pain.Goes down my left arm,my right hip and it NEVER stops. Medicine doesn't work,pt doesn't work,massage doesn't work. (Once or twice,the pain shooting down my right leg has buckled my knee out from under me.In other words,knocked me on my ass.)

 I've lived with this pain since I was really young (8 or 9) It started to get unbearable at around 16.It is something you get used to ,but not really.It also gives you a very high pain tolerance level.All this being said,I am 37 and have already had 2 back surgeries.My neurosurgeon thinks that it may be time for the third....I've been avoiding it as long as I can.But,the pain has started to mess with my life again. (Meaning,I don't want to do anything other than what I have to.It takes everything I have to make myself get up in the mornings/do the stuff a mom is supposed to do.) Anyway,my next surgery will be an implant...an SCS. (Link describing what it is)

 Today they started the testing doctors do to make sure that they put the implant in the right spot.So,this morning I got something called a Stellate Ganglion Block. (Link for this too.)This shot HURTS,though I will admit it's not as bad as some of the other things my doctors have done to me. My problem right now? My left arm,shoulder is killing me....like someone poured some hot coals on  it and left me like that.On top of everything else,I look like a stroke victim-the left side of my face is droopy. (It is normal.According to the doctor,the medicine causes it.Should go away by tomorrow.Hopefully,it does.I have got to be back at work tomorrow)

 I'm happy because we got the stuff started,I'm scared because I hate surgeries.Sort of sucks when your options are stay in pain or do something you REALLY didn't want to do,kwim? Sorry about the pity party--no need to answer.Just felt like talking.




Thought for the day :


 Women are angels and when someone breaks our wings we simply continue to fly...on a broomstick. We are flexible that way.

by on Sep. 26, 2013 at 7:13 PM
Replies (21-30):
brandyblx
by Platinum Member on Sep. 27, 2013 at 8:47 AM

BUMP!

Lucymama1
by New Member on Sep. 27, 2013 at 8:59 AM

Sending healing energy from afar.  (if you believe in that kind of thing, which I hope you do.).

I have a weird thing where I see colors in peoples bodies, and through visualization can magnetize out the colors I perceive to be undesirable and then send them out into "space" or whatever.  Sounds kind of crazy, but ... Some people pray & I don't know how to do that.  So I will do that for you  & I hope that it might help.  <3

brandyblx
by Platinum Member on Sep. 27, 2013 at 9:16 AM

 Thank you.I grew up in Bolivia...I tend to believe a lot of stuff that others don't.big smile mini

Quoting Lucymama1:

Sending healing energy from afar.  (if you believe in that kind of thing, which I hope you do.).

I have a weird thing where I see colors in peoples bodies, and through visualization can magnetize out the colors I perceive to be undesirable and then send them out into "space" or whatever.  Sounds kind of crazy, but ... Some people pray & I don't know how to do that.  So I will do that for you  & I hope that it might help.  <3


Lucymama1
by New Member on Sep. 27, 2013 at 9:26 AM
1 mom liked this

SOOO much light in the tunnel! hope you have sunglasses on :)

brandyblx
by Platinum Member on Sep. 27, 2013 at 9:53 AM

sunglasses mini

Quoting Lucymama1:

SOOO much light in the tunnel! hope you have sunglasses on :)


frndlyfn
by Emerald Member on Sep. 27, 2013 at 10:47 AM

yes she is feeling much better.  We had a meeting with her teacher to talk about a few things so now i feel better as well to know we are all on same page.

Quoting brandyblx:

 Thank you,momma.You mentioned that Jas hadn't been feeling good...is she better now?

Quoting frndlyfn:

hugs to you.  I hope this surgery will help relieve the pain.



Texascandee
by Bronze Member on Sep. 27, 2013 at 11:35 AM

I feel your pain girl.  I have been with severe back pain for a few years now, not near what you've gone through.  My pain dr is wanting to do an implant on me as well.  I didn't do surgeries because it will either stay the same, make the pain worse or do nothing at all.

He was telling me about one of his patients that couldn't walk without pain and I know that feeling too but he put in the implant and when the man came back he told the dr he was on a family outing and didn'[t even realize he had been walking for 3 hours.

My dr. is telling me I can have a "trial" implant to see if it works.  That's where he puts the leads in where they are supposed to go and the transmitter is taped on the outside.  If it works, then I can go have it permanently implanted.

Wish you the best of luck and would love to know how it works for you

Bonneata
by Bronze Member on Sep. 27, 2013 at 12:05 PM

I get it. Chronic pain is no fun at all. I deal with that daily. Nuisance myself. Hugs ! Let us know how that implant works.( crossing fingers it does.)

ditsyjo
by Gold Member on Sep. 27, 2013 at 12:52 PM
Yeah I understand


Quoting brandyblx:

 So do I! I don't usually get as "down in the dumps" as I was yesterday,I'm just so tired of hurting...kwim?

Quoting ditsyjo:



best of luck I hope it helps you alot.


Quoting brandyblx:


 As bad as it sounds,you do "get used to it".All of the surgeries I've had on my back were because I was finally at the "I CAN'T do this anymore!" phase. They've said though that the SCS works wonders....they've explained that the implant won't get rid of all the pain.That's ok,though.I could/can live with just a 30% improvement...


Quoting ditsyjo:


that really does stink...I do understand the 2 bad options thing...during my pregnancies I have the option of running the risk of life threatoning clots or taking shots every day...I reallly really hate those shots right now but...I'm sorry you are in so much pain.









taniamorse85
by Silver Member on Sep. 28, 2013 at 1:43 AM

(((Hugs)))  I hope the SCS works well for you.  I've known others who have gotten one, and it has worked wonders for them.


Unfortunately, I have somewhat of an idea of that kind of pain.  I have a laundry list of medical issues, a few of which cause me pain.  My tethered cord syndrome, which causes some of my most intense, constant pain is so bad that no neurosurgeon will come near me.  The last one told me repeatedly that another surgery to ease the tethering would almost certainly paralyze me.  As irrational as it may sound to some, that sounds a heck of a lot better than pain that feels like stabbing in my back and pelvis, as well as an 'electrical' feeling down my legs.

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