Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

The CafeMom Newcomers Club The CafeMom Newcomers Club

i have a 4 year old son and i am having some problems that i don't know how to deal with.  Where to start... First off one of my big issues is that he has this obsession with pulling my hair. It's not a confort thing anymore like I thought it was when he was a baby. Now it's all day everyday and that is how he wakes me up in the morning by grabbing a handful of my hair. It's not mommy get up, he just yanks my hair. I have been told that i could be an attention thing but i don't believe that it is because he still does it even when i am giving him attention.

The second big thing is the pushing, shoving and hitting. I have made calls ot his doctor but i am getting no response. It goes on all day every day. Anytime i try to sit down to take a minute to myself just to sit down or to calm myself when he is aggrivating me with the hair pulling or hitting, he either comes over and yanks my hair or he climbs on the chair behind me and either kicks me in the side or back or he jumps on my back. I only weigh 117 lbs. my son wieghs 37 he is a third of my body wieght. Having hium jumo on me like that really hurts or he grabs onto my shoulders and tries to shake me. He is a very strong kid i can't always ovrepower him to stop right away. I feel like i am yelling and screaming at him allday because i can't get him to stop unless i raise my voice, but that doesn't always work. We have tried time-out, corner time, and i am starting to take thinks away but i am getting very frustrated. I'm tired of my son using me as a punching bag. There is a differance between rough housing and just being mean .. and he is just being mean.

Any help would be appreciated!! We are having trouble getting him potty trained too he is just not showing any interest, should i force him.

 

by on Oct. 16, 2013 at 9:40 AM
Replies (21-24):
xena7620
by on Oct. 21, 2013 at 1:53 PM

I do not spank my son

 

xena7620
by on Nov. 24, 2013 at 8:58 AM

I have been trying to get back to my sewing but i can only do it when he is asleep or at school. I cant' do it during the day when my son is home because if I am not paying attention to him or down playing with him dad gets mad. The reason for this is because he can't physically get down and play with him he has hip and back problems and it puts him in too much. I sew when i can, or crochet and i tried to get back into doing a latch hook priject but  i start to lose interest or talk myself out of it.

 

calsmom62
by Silver Member on Nov. 24, 2013 at 9:20 AM
I agree with sensory. even giving him a blanket or pillow with long silky fringe can help. the sensory can also contribute to the other. behaviors too. you realky need him in early intervention through the school dept. its free.


Quoting NDADanceMom:

I would think there is a sensory issue at play here.  give him alternatives of non physical cues and ignore the hair pulling.  (by ignore I mean dont get up and do what he wants.  I dont mean lay there and let him hurt you.  Stop him and keep his hands off you.  point to a bell or music box (or whatever) that he needs to use in order for you to get up.  Never get up from hair pulling.  

Google therapy fidgets.  they are things that we use in the schools for kids that cant keep their hands to themselves because of sensory processing disorders.  they just need an outlet that is physical and when there is nothing they rely on hitting and touching. 


RADmomma
by on Nov. 24, 2013 at 10:33 AM
This is great advice. These suggestions worked great for my sister & her youngest!!

Quoting NDADanceMom:

I would think there is a sensory issue at play here.  give him alternatives of non physical cues and ignore the hair pulling.  (by ignore I mean dont get up and do what he wants.  I dont mean lay there and let him hurt you.  Stop him and keep his hands off you.  point to a bell or music box (or whatever) that he needs to use in order for you to get up.  Never get up from hair pulling.  

Google therapy fidgets.  they are things that we use in the schools for kids that cant keep their hands to themselves because of sensory processing disorders.  they just need an outlet that is physical and when there is nothing they rely on hitting and touching. 

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN