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having trouble conceiving.

Posted by on Oct. 18, 2013 at 10:59 AM
  • 11 Replies
I just turned 24 my fiance and I are trying to conceive. For about 6 months now. I have a really irregular cycle an sometimes it comes on for months and wont go off. No doctor has been able to explain why.. but anyway is it normal to possibly feel like its my fault that were not pregnant. Ive been really down about it lately. He doesnt blame me. But I blame myself. Has anyone else had issues like this.
by on Oct. 18, 2013 at 10:59 AM
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by Sapphire Member on Oct. 18, 2013 at 12:04 PM

Welcome to CafeMom,
Not familiar with this & hope someone else can give you some ideas.
Here is another gorup you may want to check out. :)

by Platinum Member on Oct. 18, 2013 at 1:21 PM

Congrats on your engagement!

Your feelings are totally normal.  You might consider talking to a therapist to help you work through them.

by on Oct. 18, 2013 at 1:30 PM

Hun it took us 10 months, until I discovered the ovulation tests and first month of using them I got prego. I totally understand how u feel. Don't blame ur self for it. Good luck 

by Platinum Member on Oct. 18, 2013 at 1:33 PM
Its normal to blame your self but see a therapist it will help you good luck hun
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by on Oct. 18, 2013 at 5:03 PM
Thanks everyone
by Tammie on Oct. 18, 2013 at 5:09 PM

It took me over 10 years to conceive. I most definitely blamed myself. Just remember that its science and nature not you. Don't give up and I would suggest a fertility specialist. they can run tests and determine whats going in in there. Good luck!

Photo: -Randi.

by on Oct. 18, 2013 at 5:11 PM
1 mom liked this
I TOTALLY understand! My DH and I tried for four years and I was just so upset about it. We eventually did the whole infertility thing. They put my on Clomid to make more eggs and then would ultrasound just before ovulation. Well, At the last ultrasound they told me I had 5 eggs. I could fertilize them and if more then two took, they would abort the number over. Or I could wait. I sat down under a tree and cried and refused to go back. I prayed and told God I was done trying to do it on my time. It was His because I was flat out done worrying about it. I started drinking a ton more water (they also found a heart condition at this time), and a month later I was pregnant.
The best advice I can give is to stop trying so hard! Relax. The more tense you are about it, the harder it is. If you "let go and let God", you might just be surprised. I don't know how many times I've heard of those that quite trying, adopt and then also find out they are pregnant. Good luck!
by Ruby Member on Oct. 19, 2013 at 2:36 AM
I would definitely join the TTC group linked above. I'm sorry you're feeling down but I wouldn't beat yourself up. Check out the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility to learn how your body works and how to track. Good luck!
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by on Jan. 9, 2014 at 8:20 PM

Hi coles24.  Don't blame yourself for not being able to conceive! You have not really been trying for very long and you are so young!  It doesn't always happen overnight, and other factors can be playing a role.  If you are under stress (even just from thinking about getting pregnant) that can definitely prevent pregnancy.  Now, if you are having irregular cycles, then you may be having irregular ovulation cycles as well.  You should definitely keep up with trying to figure out what the cause is!!  The good thing is that you have time on your side!!  Don't let time go by, like I did!! I have been trying to conceive, on and off, for over 7 years now with no luck! I am 44 now, so it may not happen for me! You will figure out what is going on and you will get pregnant!! :-)

by Member on Jan. 9, 2014 at 8:22 PM

It takes on average a year to conceive, and that is for a healthy couple. I am not trying to discourage you, just trying to share facts I've found during our TTC journey :) I wish you nothing but the best and hope you get your sticky baby soon :)

I feel like it is my fault month after month, and DH feels like it is his fault. =\


Noel (25)
& Brandon (26)
TTC since March 1, 2008
Avery Drew (grew wings 1/5/08 at 6wks 3days gestation)
Skylar Dakota (grew wings 4/19/08 at 5wks 1day gestation)
Charlie Blake (grew wings 4/4/10 at 4wks 3days gestation)

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