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Need advice please!!

Posted by on Nov. 10, 2013 at 6:18 PM
  • 7 Replies
I was babysitting a little girl (6yo) and my daughter (4yo) asked if she could stay the night. seeing as how they were getting along so well and I had babysit for the mom for a long time in the past (babysat for 3 yrs but I have not kept this little girl for about a year) I decided it would be ok. Later on that evening the girls were playing in my daughters room and had closed the door I opened the door and my daughters panties were down and the other little girl was next to her and had jumped back. It was hard to tell exactly what was going on since my daughter has a loft bed castle tent. I asked my 4yo what was going on and she said they were reading books and I asked her again and told her that I wanted to know the truth and she told me that the other little girl wanted to see what was in her butt and peepee. I immediately talked to my daughter and her about this behavior. Well the nxt morning while making breakfast I told both the girls how we don't show our privates and to always tell. When 6yo mom picked up I told her what happened and I had talked to them. So after they left my 4yo climbed in my lap and tells me 6yo had licked her inside her mouth she then told me mommy she also licked my butt and my peepee I told her no but she did it anyway and she licked my hair. Im so sad for my daughter and don't know as a parent what to do. Plus I don't even know what to say to the other mom. I have been babysitting kids for over 4 yrs and never had anything like this happen.
by on Nov. 10, 2013 at 6:18 PM
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Replies (1-7):
frndlyfn
by Emerald Member on Nov. 10, 2013 at 6:20 PM

I would talk to the mom again and see if anything has happened since the last time the child was in your care consistently.

angelamarie434
by Member on Nov. 10, 2013 at 6:36 PM

When I told her she told me this is the first time her daughter has did anything like that but I remember her telling me that the little girl had her leap pad taken away a few yrs back for taking pics of her private areas. Her mom seems like a great mom and in all the years I have known her and the little girl and step dad they have been one of my best families. The only new things is mom is married to stepdad who has been in the little gilrs life almost as long as I have known them and her grandmother is sick

 

DallasCowboys81
by Gold Member on Nov. 10, 2013 at 6:44 PM
Usually when a child of that age does something like that on another child it is being done to them.that is what my first reaction was reading your post. Id contact DCFS and have them do a random check, they can go to the childs school and question the child then make n appearance at the home. Id stop it now before it gets to bad. Sorry this happened to your dd. Sorry its going on at all.
angelamarie434
by Member on Nov. 10, 2013 at 7:00 PM
I know I have to call and report it I just hate that especially since it will be pretty obvious that its me doing the calling. But your right if its happening to her its very important to make sure its stopped. My thing is I am so worried that my daughter is going to be traumatized (not to over dramatize) by this or that now she may repeat the behavior. I have talked to her about it and honestly just want to keep drilling in her head that if someone asks you to show, touch or let them touch you then run away and tell always tell. I have had conversations with her at random in the past about this and she didn't tell me and now Im worried that she wont tell if it ever happens again. Im also worried that if I keep talking to her about it that it may make the situation worse and make her more curious.
DallasCowboys81
by Gold Member on Nov. 11, 2013 at 12:32 AM
As long as she is comfottable telling you then thats all that matters. Just make sure its always known she can tell you anything. You do need to call, if the mom gets upset with you its because she has a guilty conscience. She knows whats being done and not stopping it. That poor little girl is scared , cinfused and prob dont understand why its being done to her. Its a sad situation but needs to be handled

Quoting angelamarie434:

I know I have to call and report it I just hate that especially since it will be pretty obvious that its me doing the calling. But your right if its happening to her its very important to make sure its stopped. My thing is I am so worried that my daughter is going to be traumatized (not to over dramatize) by this or that now she may repeat the behavior. I have talked to her about it and honestly just want to keep drilling in her head that if someone asks you to show, touch or let them touch you then run away and tell always tell. I have had conversations with her at random in the past about this and she didn't tell me and now Im worried that she wont tell if it ever happens again. Im also worried that if I keep talking to her about it that it may make the situation worse and make her more curious.
Croissants
by Member on Nov. 11, 2013 at 12:37 AM

You go and talk with the mother about what your daughter told you and never let the other girl sees your little girl again and stop babysit her.That what I will do.

IncognitoOne
by Angela-Marie on Nov. 11, 2013 at 8:03 AM

I would talk to the mom again. She needs to know. I don't think I would automatically jump to abuse. Sometimes kids see things they shouldn't and want to try it, she could have walked in on an adult watching porn, or walked in on step dad doing the same to mom.

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