Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

The CafeMom Newcomers Club The CafeMom Newcomers Club

Have you had a family member in hospital?

Posted by on Nov. 25, 2013 at 9:50 AM
  • 121 Replies
2 moms liked this

My sister is in the hospital needing surgery right now.  Have you had family members in the hospital? What do you do for them?  I offered to come over but she didn't want me to, at least last night.

by on Nov. 25, 2013 at 9:50 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Molimomma
by Member on Nov. 25, 2013 at 10:09 AM
1 mom liked this

Yes. My mom had a 14 hour surgery for colon cancer when I was a freshman in high school. She spent a week in the hospital. She was home for another 6-8 weeks after that. It was a LONG, tough recovery. 

I think it really depends what they're in the hospital for. I spent a week in the hospital when I had my son(failed induction then a c-section on day 3!). I was busy with baby so didn't need anything but help getting to the bathroom!

My mother was really drugged the first few couple days and couldn't move around because of all the tubes and "gear" she was connected to. Then later they want you sitting then eventually walking around so it's nice to have family there to help you. All my mom wanted was to be able to brush her teeth and as she was feeling better, to wash her hair(her best friend helped her wash it in the bathroom sink!). 

She may need a robe or slippers later on. She'd probably appreciate some thing to do if she's stuck in bed and not too tired. If she is there for more than a day or 2 and is allowed to eat you might want to bring her some outside food(it really depends what she had surgery for, if she has a special diet from the doctor, what meds she may be on, etc.) If she has a family at home the nicest thing may be to go to her house and bring THEM a meal, or do a household chore that might not be getting done like vacuuming or laundry.

theloudhouse
by Member on Nov. 25, 2013 at 10:14 AM
I had two surgeries this summer. Spent the time in hospital barfing from the meds and something called illeus or sleeping. I did get lonely but everyone was busy. If you have the ability to just go whenever, then offer to visit if she gets bored. Say just call me sis. And of course offer to help when she gets home. I was so sore after the first which had an incision along my old c-section scar. And tired! Help with shopping, meals. Rent her a funny movie. Get her a favorite snack. Hope she does okay and recovers quick. What's her surgery for?
IncognitoOne
by Angela-Marie on Nov. 25, 2013 at 10:15 AM

I've had several family members in the hospital. We always visit them and bring them things to do/read and snack on if it's allowed.

theloudhouse
by Member on Nov. 25, 2013 at 10:17 AM
1 mom liked this
Yes, a longer hospital stay means more hospital food and snacks. Bring her home cooked food if she's up to it and there's no diet restrictions.


Quoting Molimomma:

Yes. My mom had a 14 hour surgery for colon cancer when I was a freshman in high school. She spent a week in the hospital. She was home for another 6-8 weeks after that. It was a LONG, tough recovery. 

I think it really depends what they're in the hospital for. I spent a week in the hospital when I had my son(failed induction then a c-section on day 3!). I was busy with baby so didn't need anything but help getting to the bathroom!

My mother was really drugged the first few couple days and couldn't move around because of all the tubes and "gear" she was connected to. Then later they want you sitting then eventually walking around so it's nice to have family there to help you. All my mom wanted was to be able to brush her teeth and as she was feeling better, to wash her hair(her best friend helped her wash it in the bathroom sink!). 

She may need a robe or slippers later on. She'd probably appreciate some thing to do if she's stuck in bed and not too tired. If she is there for more than a day or 2 and is allowed to eat you might want to bring her some outside food(it really depends what she had surgery for, if she has a special diet from the doctor, what meds she may be on, etc.) If she has a family at home the nicest thing may be to go to her house and bring THEM a meal, or do a household chore that might not be getting done like vacuuming or laundry.


PlaysAllDay
by Bronze Member on Nov. 25, 2013 at 10:26 AM
1 mom liked this
I've been the one in the hosp. I very much appreciated non hospital food. I liked when people brought me magazines, movies. Gift cards and meals for when i got home. If it was unexpected like mine bring her underwear!! My DH packed me like we were going on a romantic getaway.
DallasCowboys81
by Platinum Member on Nov. 25, 2013 at 10:38 AM
Yep, my dd 4 mths old had open heart. It wad a 8 hr surgery that seemed like it was a week long.
mandee1503
by on Nov. 25, 2013 at 10:52 AM
1 mom liked this
My kids. My ds more then my dd. I usually stay with them the whole time. When my mom was there for surgery when I was in high school I saw her once. But because the hospital was an hour away.
NDADanceMom
by on Nov. 25, 2013 at 11:02 AM
1 mom liked this

It really depends on the person.  My sister had a baby in june and had 35 visitors.  I had a baby last week and requested no visitors.  When my daughter is in the hospital (diabetic) she likes her computer and phone, visitors are virtual for teens.  She also can not have snacks and treats other than what the hospital brings her.  

sweetpea810
by on Nov. 25, 2013 at 11:45 AM
1 mom liked this

My grandma had a stroke back in May 2011, Mothers Day weekend..my mom and I flew to Texas and stayed the week. We slept mostly in the ICU waiting room and my aunts couch. I helped suction out some of the saliva that would pool in her mouth and she would drool. My grandma is a very private person and likes to remain presentable at times so she would crack jokes about how she looked. Then my now 7 month old son was in the hospital for a month( second stay, Mothers Day weekend this year was the first and most of his life for pnuemonia. I stayed there night and day til we were discharged...I took care of him and of course learned everything about changing out picc line and putting in a NG tube. Just bring items from home or ask if anything needs doing at home and or bring a homemade meal...hospital food can get boring

MommaVoo
by Bronze Member on Nov. 25, 2013 at 12:17 PM

BIL drowned this year(survived) and ended up losing both his legs below the knee, he has since turned 18 so very young. He was in the hospital for weeks, touch and go at first as he was in an induced coma because he wasn't breathing for 3 minutes before they revived him. He is doing fairly well and will be fitted with legs soon and seems to have zero brain issues fromt he 3 min plus coma. We live on the other side of the US so werent able to do much but offer our support from a far. Got tickets for my MIL to come out and see her first granddaughter be born and have a small vacation. 

The best thing you can do is just be there for all involved and help with whatever is needed.

CafeMom Tickers
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)