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Daughter telling me she hates herself....

Posted by on Jan. 16, 2014 at 4:01 PM
  • 7 Replies

Hi,

I used to be on CafeMom a few years ago but cannot remember how to log into my old account. I need advice/support. My daugher is 9 years old. She's in the 3rd grade. I've noticed since around June she has started to have really bad anxiety attacks. I've worked with her on calming herself down and breathing/meditation. She is the sweetest little girl ( I know I'm her Mom but she really is). She not like the other girls in her class though. She's very artsy and quiet and shy. She tries to put herself out there but she has a hard time. She is very private and does not like attention being brought to her. Since I have started working about 4 months ago she has been spending a little more time with my Mom. My Mom LOVES attention and will say anything and everything that my daughter has said or done to all of her friends and family. I've been talking to her for a while to make sure she knows she can talk to me about anything. For a couple weeks now the breathing and meditation hasn't been working. She cries constantly and said yesterday that she really hates herself. I asked her why and she said she just does. She also said she really doesn't feel like she is a good daughter. I cried. I never want my daughter to feel that way. I work hard to keep an open/honest relationship with her so that she feels she can come to me about anything. Any advice on how to help her know her worth. To build her self confidence? My Mom never taught me any of this considering she homeschooled me and kept me isolated. I'm wanting to do the right thing but I feel like I'm failing.

 

~ Charity ~

by on Jan. 16, 2014 at 4:01 PM
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by Sapphire Member on Jan. 16, 2014 at 4:37 PM

WElcome back to CafeMom,
Sounds like there is something going on with your daughter?
maybe you going back to work or something else?
Perhaps maybe you can seek a counselor for her to see if that will help0.
Hugs to you hon :)

Quoting Hopefulsoul82:

Hi,

I used to be on CafeMom a few years ago but cannot remember how to log into my old account. I need advice/support. My daugher is 9 years old. She's in the 3rd grade. I've noticed since around June she has started to have really bad anxiety attacks. I've worked with her on calming herself down and breathing/meditation. She is the sweetest little girl ( I know I'm her Mom but she really is). She not like the other girls in her class though. She's very artsy and quiet and shy. She tries to put herself out there but she has a hard time. She is very private and does not like attention being brought to her. Since I have started working about 4 months ago she has been spending a little more time with my Mom. My Mom LOVES attention and will say anything and everything that my daughter has said or done to all of her friends and family. I've been talking to her for a while to make sure she knows she can talk to me about anything. For a couple weeks now the breathing and meditation hasn't been working. She cries constantly and said yesterday that she really hates herself. I asked her why and she said she just does. She also said she really doesn't feel like she is a good daughter. I cried. I never want my daughter to feel that way. I work hard to keep an open/honest relationship with her so that she feels she can come to me about anything. Any advice on how to help her know her worth. To build her self confidence? My Mom never taught me any of this considering she homeschooled me and kept me isolated. I'm wanting to do the right thing but I feel like I'm failing.


~ Charity ~


charleyangel317
by on Jan. 16, 2014 at 4:38 PM

Try Googleing self esteme events for girls in your area. Some areas have things like that to empower young girls and help build their self esteme.

DallasCowboys81
by Platinum Member on Jan. 16, 2014 at 6:08 PM
Awe.. :( i agree with hugs maybe something more is gping on that your not aware of. I think a counselor either school or therapy would be good. Hope it all works out well..
Mommy4-27-08
by Bronze Member on Jan. 16, 2014 at 6:18 PM
Ould you get her into an outside extra curricular? Like girl scouts or art classes or something? I think those are really good for kids confidence and I would look into those.
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happyolechimp
by on Jan. 16, 2014 at 6:33 PM
the teachers she has and counselor at the school could maybe have insight..you should make an appointment without her knowing..

who's around at your moms house..? could be there..good wishes hun.. :-(
Hopefulsoul82
by on Jan. 17, 2014 at 4:37 PM
1 mom liked this

 I've never heard of things like that. I am def going to check it out. Thank you!

Quoting charleyangel317:

Try Googleing self esteme events for girls in your area. Some areas have things like that to empower young girls and help build their self esteme.

 

Hopefulsoul82
by on Jan. 17, 2014 at 4:39 PM
Quoting DallasCowboys81: Awe.. :( i agree with hugs maybe something more is gping on that your not aware of. I think a counselor either school or therapy would be good. Hope it all works out well..
I agree. I called and set up an appointment with a counselor. She told me today she wishes she would just disappear. This is killing me hearing my own daughter so sad.
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