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Untraditional Stay at home mom

Posted by on Jan. 22, 2014 at 11:40 AM
  • 19 Replies

     I have a fantastic family, a husband of six years, and two beautiful daughters, I should feel fortunate to have the ability to stay home with them daily, I realize some mothers want this, but are unable to do so.  So that being said, I am absolutely miserable...I wake up everyday wishing the day was over, I realize now I am just coping to get through until bedtime.  My children aren't bad, my oldest is in school all day and my youngest is probably the most well behaved toddler I have ever met...but, I feel like I have lost ME, I have no other adult interaction other then my husband, and if we are being completely honest he is no help whatsoever.  He doesn't understand why I am so unhappy, he tells me all the time how many women would love to be in my situation.  I hate that I feel this way, my children deserve better, I love them more then anything in the world, I just don't enjoy being around them anymore.  I have friends that I talk too on a daily basis, I try to keep up to date with the news and things going on around the world, but nothing is helping.  So, how do other stay at home moms do it?  They walk around with a smile on their face, baking cookies, attending PTA meetings, and Im over here saying...yay....kept my kids alive today...

by on Jan. 22, 2014 at 11:40 AM
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by Bronze Member on Jan. 22, 2014 at 11:44 AM

Honestly, being a SAHM isn't for everyone. I would look into going back to work, even if it is just part time while DH is home.

by on Jan. 22, 2014 at 11:45 AM
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My husband helps me a lot. 

You need you time, regardless of being a sahm. You're with the kids 24/7 and you're getting burnt out. 

If your husband really wants to help, he can watch the kids for you so you can get out alone. 

by on Jan. 22, 2014 at 11:47 AM
Sounds like you need a break or outside activity. There is nothing wrong with that either
by on Jan. 22, 2014 at 11:49 AM
I feel ya. I do work two days out if the week though and that does help but Im still doing the sahm stuff before and right after work. I get no alone time because I drop my baby off at babysitter and then pick up. Sometimes feel like Im sinking.

I appreciate staying home with my lovies most of the week but this mama needs a break :(

I have no friends, so even if I had alone time id probably just do laundry :/
by on Jan. 22, 2014 at 11:51 AM

Have you ever thought of starting an at home business?  Would give you something else to do and might give you another reason to make you want to get up each day.  Just a thought.  I know that some moms feel they need to "contribute" but still want to be able to stay home with their kids.

Maybe join a group with your toddler where you can meet other moms.

by Member on Jan. 22, 2014 at 1:15 PM

I am sorry that you are feeling like this. I know it must be difficult, is there a group or activity that you can join to have some you time every now and then? I found this article that you may find helpful. It is Stay and Home Moms: Taking Care of Yourself: .

Can you have a sitter stay with the kids and have a date night out with your husband? Or have your husband baby sit and have a girls night out?

by Trica on Jan. 22, 2014 at 9:44 PM
I'm blessed enough to do what you do!! And I get a break,even though my kids go to school.
by on Jan. 22, 2014 at 9:46 PM
I stay at home. But I go out and have my own things I do to. And me and hubs go out at least once a week for us time. I couldn't just stay home 24/7 I'd go nuts!
by Bronze Member on Jan. 22, 2014 at 9:47 PM
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You sound depressed.  Please go to your doctor for a physical and check up.  They'll ask you some questions and might prescribe you a medication for depression/anxiety.  This is the beginning step to getting out there and finding something for YOU!  

Honestly, do you want to be a PTA mom?  That wouldn't make me happy, that's not my hobby.  But it makes other moms happy.  What do you want to do with your life?  What do you like to do?  What makes you happy?   

by Platinum Member on Jan. 22, 2014 at 9:50 PM

honestly, I think when it comes to being a sahm, either its something you really love and enjoy, or you hate. personally, I have been a sahm for the past 11, going on 12 years, and I have love every single second of it. I loved being at home with my babies and doing the sahm thing. cooking, cleaning, and running errands and that. I feel it was what I was meant to do with my life. I have absolutely no desire to ever go back to work. I dread the day all my kids are in school and I have to go back to work. but everybody is different. I have friends that have done the sahm thing for a few years and hated every second of it as well and couldn't wait to go back to work. I think no matter what you do, you are probably never going to be happy being  sahm. some people just don't like it. thats ok. maybe you can try and get a job in the evenings after your husband gets home for work or maybe its time to think about putting the kids in daycare so you can go back to work. there no point in being a sahm if its not something you really love and enjoy.

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