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Have a conversation with_______?? update

Posted by on Feb. 24, 2014 at 7:08 AM
  • 15 Replies
1 mom liked this

There is a girl in my daughters ballet that is always pointing out "flaws" in my daughters body.  Tells her she is fat or her boobs arent big enough, her legs are fat or she has no butt.  Now my daugher is asking me all the time if she looks ok. 

This child is flawless.  She is 11.  Even if she didnt look amazing nobody should be constantly picking on her about her body.  Should I talk to the studio, the girls mom, the girl or just keep telling my daughter she looks fine?

Update:

Just to clarify about her actual appearance when she is not stage ready.  Here she is with her friends.... Back row in the navy blue shirt and no hat...  She doesnt always look 25 =)

by on Feb. 24, 2014 at 7:08 AM
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Replies (1-10):
lucky2Beeme
by Platinum Member on Feb. 24, 2014 at 7:11 AM

That girl in picture is only 11 ? wow she looks grown up. She is beautiful with a perfect body.

starreyedcutie
by Platinum Member on Feb. 24, 2014 at 7:15 AM
Teach your daughter to love herself. Love her body and to not care what others think. She looks beautiful and see nothing "wrong" with her at all. Kids are so cruel

Quoting NDADanceMom:

There is a girl in my daughters ballet that is always pointing out "flaws" in my daughters body.  Tells her she is fat or her boobs arent big enough, her legs are fat or she has no butt.  Now my daugher is asking me all the time if she looks ok. 

This child is flawless.  She is 11.  Even if she didnt look amazing nobody should be constantly picking on her about her body.  Should I talk to the studio, the girls mom, the girl or just keep telling my daughter she looks fine?

NDADanceMom
by on Feb. 24, 2014 at 7:22 AM

Yup.  12 in a month.  Picture day at dance on Saturday so she had stage makup on and her hair was done.

Quoting lucky2Beeme:

That girl in picture is only 11 ? wow she looks grown up. She is beautiful with a perfect body.


gavs4boys
by on Feb. 25, 2014 at 8:08 AM

I would bring it up the the parents.  This girl has no right to do something like that.

bhow
by on Feb. 25, 2014 at 8:29 AM

Holy crap ... she's 11??  This other girl is clearly jealous and has no self esteem.  Your daughter is a knock out!  Wow!!  

KatCawrse
by Member on Feb. 25, 2014 at 12:35 PM

if she's "fat", I want to be that fat, where do I sign up?! From here she look's a beautiful child with a promising future ahead! Plus a nice figure for a ballet dancer. To my knowledge their supposed to be petite in ALL areas, aren't they?!

NDADanceMom
by on Feb. 25, 2014 at 1:54 PM


Quoting KatCawrse:

if she's "fat", I want to be that fat, where do I sign up?! From here she look's a beautiful child with a promising future ahead! Plus a nice figure for a ballet dancer. To my knowledge their supposed to be petite in ALL areas, aren't they?!

Yes, they should be very tiny.  Truth be told she is likely going to be too large to dance pointe as she ages.  She is already taller than most of the soloists in her current production.  She is only a novice and is in the corpse de ballet as a medow dancer right now.  She doesnt have the strength to be up on pointe for more than a turn or 2. =) 

mylove415
by on Feb. 25, 2014 at 1:56 PM
1 mom liked this
Your daughter is beautiful!
KatCawrse
by Member on Feb. 25, 2014 at 2:00 PM

well when this starts to happen to my daughter, I'm going to bring it to the parents attention, the teachers attention, and just encourage my girl to dust little brats like that off her shoulders! Every little girl is beautiful, no matter what other children say!

Quoting NDADanceMom:


Quoting KatCawrse:

if she's "fat", I want to be that fat, where do I sign up?! From here she look's a beautiful child with a promising future ahead! Plus a nice figure for a ballet dancer. To my knowledge their supposed to be petite in ALL areas, aren't they?!

Yes, they should be very tiny.  Truth be told she is likely going to be too large to dance pointe as she ages.  She is already taller than most of the soloists in her current production.  She is only a novice and is in the corpse de ballet as a medow dancer right now.  She doesnt have the strength to be up on pointe for more than a turn or 2. =) 


Megs5384
by on Feb. 25, 2014 at 4:00 PM

Something I often tell my daughter is that children are taught to be mean. The things she is saying to your daughter are most likely things she is hearing from someone else about HER body. Whether it's from her parents, a sibling, other family, or something she's picking up from media, I can't tell you. But she hearing from/seeing it somewhere. I feel bad for her.

You're daughter is absolutely beautiful just the way she is! It's a tough lesson to teach at this age, but I'm working on teaching my daughter, who is also 11, that sometimes in life, there's just no way to avoid mean people. We just have to be strong and confident in ourselves and our happiness and not let them bring us down!

I would definitely bring it up with at least the teacher. She may know the family better and may be able to handle the situation better since she's on the outside of the situation. As moms, our instinct is to protect, and that can sometimes lead to unnessecary conflict. Might be better to have that third party.

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