making friends on playdates - it's like dating again! aah!
I would love to hear if any other moms have a different take on my experience with another mom, I feel like the same questions come up like in dating!
I first met a mom from my son's daycare several months ago. She told me she was so excited to finally meet me, she was so happy our kids were friends, and how she wanted our kids to go to college together! She was super friendly & told me she would love to get our kids together for a playdate. I don't instantly give out my number to anyone but she was os overzealous about getting together for a playdate so I gave her my number & told her I'd be happy to get together. I had all but forgotten about her when she finally called 5 months later. So we had a playdate & we & the kids had a great time. We then kept in touch with texts & every text was again so super friendly & telling me she couldn't wait to get together again. I then didn't hear back from her again for awhile & thought maybe something had happened, or maybe she says things she means at the times then forgets. so just as i was ready to just figure she'd be an acquaintance i might see at the school functions, she writes again telling me she can't wait to get together again. So my husband is telling me this is for my son, not for me, and that if my son wants to go, I should. So during this playdate ahe tells me so much about herself, really open, telling me very personal things, then tells me taht we have to get together weekly because she loves it as well as the boys love it. She then asks me for all my info for her cell phone & tells me she needs it all because we are now such good friends, she's changing where I am in her phone. She tells me stories about other people who she calls acquaintances & goes out of her way to say we are now such good friends, not something I would actually say as I get to know someone, I guess letting a friendship unfold without needing to say, "We're friends now!". I thought it was kind of sweet, & she talked about how we were going to get together as a whole family, and that we ahould start babysitting for each other so we could each have date nights with our husbands, and was also planning months ahead for things like birthdays. So when i left she gave me a huge hug, ans told me to call when I got home so that she knew i was home safely. It all seemed so sweet, but baffling because of each long pause between seeing her, and the amount she would talk about what great friends we are each time we'd see each other.
Then I made plans with her which she had to cancel because her kids were sick which was totally understandable. I told her to please let me know it they needed anything. She never wrote back, still hasn't 3 weeks later. It was baffling to go from being overly sweet & calling us great friends the last time we saw each other & each text after that until her last one. My husband told me again it's for my son & I guess it would be silly to believe anything she says at this point if i hear from her again. If my son wants to go on another playdate, I guess I should. Would anyone else be baffled by this behavior, or is it clear to you, & I'm missing something? I had a great time each time because she's very fun, friendly, affectionate but I never was in the slightest asking about being friends or anything else, it was all out of nowhere when she would come out with these overly friendly things after actually only meeting in person a few times. I began to wonder if she had wanted something from me, she has asked for some advice related to my old work, but she didn't know what I did before. So I'm pretty baffled by the behavior & to be honest disappointed since it's hard meeting other fun moms for playdates & I loved the idea of a weekly playdate & friends for the kids while we adults could have an adult conversation! At this point I don't know if I'll hear from her again but if I do clearly I know not to expect much. I also know I may not hear from her again & I'm left wondering why?
If anyone out there thinks they may have some insight, I'd love to hear it. In some ways, it feels like dating again when you go through someone saying they like you then don't call. I don't miss dating, I don't miss that drama. I wondered if maybe there is a part of her that is either very dramatic, and then atresses out if she makes plans ahe later feels overwhelmed to keep. I'm left second guessing, so any other thoughts or encouraging words would be appreciated! Hope all you moms are having a good & easy day today :)