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So the guy I have been seeing (who is not the baby daddy btw) told me he loved me the other night. It was over text so I am not sure if he was kidding. I just kinda played it off like he was. I am seriously his first gf =/  and the whole love thing is weird for me. Would it hurt your feelings if you meant it when you said it and the other person just acted like it was a joke? He doesn't seem hurt by it. But he has been acting weird. It's just weird for me being pregnant and being with him. I feel like he is getting really involved in the idea of me, him, and the baby even though it isn't his. Should I even be feeling weird bout that? Idk... 

by on Mar. 16, 2014 at 1:16 AM
Replies (11-20):
Zipcrystal
by Member on Mar. 16, 2014 at 9:11 PM

Yeah I am worried about the baby being around him for only a few months and then him leaving =( Because I know that's hard on kids

Quoting seaturtle1:

This is just my opinion and I am not judging you.  But I feel that life right now needs to be about you and your new baby.  If things do not work out with you two.  The baby will get hurt when he leaves.  You are a mom right now enjoy being that.  Work on finding love a little bit later.


Zipcrystal
by Member on Mar. 16, 2014 at 9:12 PM

I am 23 and he is 24

Quoting Kt6713:

agreed. you cant have been together too long if you are pregnant with some other dudes kid, i would definitely take it slow. let him go off to school, see if the long distance thing works for both of you, because it is not easy, trust me. how old are you guys?

Quoting seaturtle1:

This is just my opinion and I am not judging you.  But I feel that life right now needs to be about you and your new baby.  If things do not work out with you two.  The baby will get hurt when he leaves.  You are a mom right now enjoy being that.  Work on finding love a little bit later.



Zipcrystal
by Member on Mar. 16, 2014 at 9:15 PM

Your right =/ I need to figure out how I would feel about him staying with me instead of going to school. 

Quoting Mommy4-27-08: When me and my df started seeing each other, I was worried about this as well. He had a lot of dreams (i'll admit they were unobtainable dreams, but dreams none the less). He said something when we got together (I already had two kids from a previous relationship) and it has kind of stuck with me through our relationship. He said he didn't give up on his dreams, he traded them for new ones. I think this happens several times in your life and the fact that he acknowledged that made me feel a lot better. Now on the flip side, when I was younger (pre-kids) I dated a great guy. We were together for 6 months or so before I broke it off and I did because he was talking about changing his life for me and I didnt want to feel that guilt. He was giving up dreams that were totally his and we just weren't in the same place. I don't regret it and I did love him, but I loved him enough to let him go when I needed to. It really comes down to how you would feel about it and whether you could live with it.


BIMOM21
by Gold Member on Mar. 16, 2014 at 9:16 PM
1 mom liked this
My view on this is communication is key. Things won't get sorted out unless you two are able to sit down and talk about your concerns, desires, and fears and vice versa.
bellydancer1984
by on Mar. 16, 2014 at 9:18 PM

it depends how do you feel about him and about the relationship?

3xangel
by Ruby Member on Mar. 16, 2014 at 9:25 PM
1 mom liked this
I get it. Just remind him that the timing is a little off and to just take it slow.

Quoting Zipcrystal:

Met him in college, he tutored me in Chemistry. I went on one date with him (didn't have sex) and then a few days later took a test and found out I was pregnant. We have been together about 4 months, but I saw him a lot before we became a thing. I am 29 weeks. I think I do want one, but it's just a weird timing. 

Quoting 3xangel: What's the backstory? How far along are you? How long have you been with this guy? Do you honestly want to be in a relationship right now?

Zipcrystal
by Member on Mar. 16, 2014 at 9:28 PM

I like him but I do not think I love him. I care enough to not want to hurt him or have him chose me over other things. I think he's great and I am happy I have him right now. But I don't want to be selfish

Quoting bellydancer1984:

it depends how do you feel about him and about the relationship?


bellydancer1984
by on Mar. 16, 2014 at 9:30 PM

maybe it is time for you all to talk about where you see the relationship going..i know if you aren't on the same page right now that could hurt him but if you don't feel like you want to end up in the same place it will hurt him a lot  more down the road...how long have you all been together? 

Quoting Zipcrystal:

I like him but I do not think I love him. I care enough to not want to hurt him or have him chose me over other things. I think he's great and I am happy I have him right now. But I don't want to be selfish

Quoting bellydancer1984:

it depends how do you feel about him and about the relationship?


Zipcrystal
by Member on Mar. 16, 2014 at 9:40 PM

Not very long maybe 4 or 5 months. I think he's in puppy love so...I do need to talk to him about what is going to happen cuz we are both done at this college after this semester and then we have to go elsewhere. But I will be delayed due to the baby. Even without the baby part of it, we would probably went to different schools anyway.

Quoting bellydancer1984:

maybe it is time for you all to talk about where you see the relationship going..i know if you aren't on the same page right now that could hurt him but if you don't feel like you want to end up in the same place it will hurt him a lot  more down the road...how long have you all been together? 

Quoting Zipcrystal:

I like him but I do not think I love him. I care enough to not want to hurt him or have him chose me over other things. I think he's great and I am happy I have him right now. But I don't want to be selfish

Quoting bellydancer1984:

it depends how do you feel about him and about the relationship?


fudgybuddymom
by Bronze Member on Mar. 17, 2014 at 12:40 PM
1 mom liked this

I would feel weird too. Knowing me since it made me feel so weird I would break it off with him. But that's just me!

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