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Should a man be forced to pay child support if...?

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A couple gets together and he says he doesn't ever want kids and she agrees BUT secretly wishes to have them in the future.

She goes on the pill and they use condoms as a backup measure, just in case, because he's adamantly against having children but isn't ready to be sterilized just yet.

A year or so later, she decides she wants a baby and not only stops taking the pill without telling him but also sabotages the condoms.

When she gets pregnant, he reminds her he doesn't want kids, never did, and urges her to abort. She refuses, but when the baby's born she takes him to court for child support.

Should he have to pay child support even though he was forced into fatherhood by her deception?

by on Apr. 14, 2014 at 5:16 PM
Replies (251-259):
saywatuwill
by on Apr. 20, 2014 at 9:58 PM
To me it isn't just a body decision. There is a lot more to it then that.

Quoting booaura: How is it a double standard? Each sex has control over their own body and what they do with it.

Quoting saywatuwill: If she doesn't want kids ever then she should do the same. I Believe it is a double standard. You don't. That's fine.

Quoting sugarcrisp:

He has the ability by controlling what he does with his penis and the contents of his testicles. Don't want kids, ever? Get a vasectomy. Really, it's quite simple. 

Quoting saywatuwill:

I know it isn't easy. I can be prefectly honest in that I'd be way to selfish to give a child up for adoption. I couldn't do it. Either way, it was a small part of my response. They BOTH choose to have sex. She can walk away if she wants via various ways but he cannot. He should have the right as well IF she can.  

Quoting sugarcrisp:

He has the ability of controlling the contents of his testicles just as she has control of the contents of her uterus.

And adoption isn't as easy as so many of you women make it sound. She does need his consent.

Quoting saywatuwill:

The answers given so far just show a double standard. A woman has a way out via murder/giving the baby up but a man is stuck with whatever HE decides. His decision is having sex but a woman's isn't. Riiiight. 

romanceparty4u
by on Apr. 21, 2014 at 12:06 AM

Yep, it takes two to tango, and he did the deed, regardless--he knew what the outcome "could be" and now he's a father.

Men should prepare themselves for deception, IMO. I always warned my male friends that women like this exist, and whether or not she "says she's on the pill" unless he puts it in her mouth and watches her swallow it, he better "bring his own" and "wrap that thing".

SmallTown_Momma
by Member on Apr. 21, 2014 at 5:18 AM
Than they are not thinking with common sense, nor are they thinking with logic.

I'm 34 , i only have one child..but I am done having kids and plan on getting my tubes tied as soon as I can! Lol


Quoting RTMJDNTARDIS:

Yes its a debatable question. because while i agree with you100%, there are a lot of women who throw a fit at the idea of HER being required to get surgically fixed. 

they also throw a fit at the idea of keeping her legs shut if she doesnt want kids. 

Quoting SmallTown_Momma: Just saw this ...but uhm...yes! How is that even a debatable question?

Quoting RTMJDNTARDIS:

So if a woman doesnt want kids, instead of using abortion as birth control, should she just get fixed?

Quoting SmallTown_Momma:

If he really didn't want kids , he should have gotten snipped.

And if a man is really going to sit there and fight to pay child support after looking at the child that he helped create , than he should give up his parental rights as well.

Karmahappens
by Member on Apr. 21, 2014 at 7:31 AM

 

Quoting Caitlin10081989:

NO, he should NOT have to pay child support. 

 But the child support is for the child-who is totally blameless in all of this.

elzingah36
by on Apr. 21, 2014 at 7:39 AM
Personally,no. I don't think a man should have to pay child support in those circumstances. Unfortunately though,some women are experts liars and the act of deception can never be proven,technically. It could be fought in court but,in the end,the disgusting shrew of a liar will more than likely win and I honestly hope she will reap what she sows! Usually,one would like to think that if a child is conceived and born that both parents will love the child,even if they're separated and/or divorced. If a child is brought into this world by a disgusting liar of a mother and a father who never wanted him/her in the first place,then that's the lowest of selfishness on the woman's part and she should be considered lowly trash. Imo.
elzingah36
by on Apr. 21, 2014 at 7:42 AM
Any woman that would do something like this definitely isn't thinking with common sense or logic in the first place.

Quoting SmallTown_Momma: Than they are not thinking with common sense, nor are they thinking with logic.

I'm 34 , i only have one child..but I am done having kids and plan on getting my tubes tied as soon as I can! Lol


Quoting RTMJDNTARDIS:

Yes its a debatable question. because while i agree with you100%, there are a lot of women who throw a fit at the idea of HER being required to get surgically fixed. 

they also throw a fit at the idea of keeping her legs shut if she doesnt want kids. 

Quoting SmallTown_Momma: Just saw this ...but uhm...yes! How is that even a debatable question?

Quoting RTMJDNTARDIS:

So if a woman doesnt want kids, instead of using abortion as birth control, should she just get fixed?

Quoting SmallTown_Momma:

If he really didn't want kids , he should have gotten snipped.

And if a man is really going to sit there and fight to pay child support after looking at the child that he helped create , than he should give up his parental rights as well.

crazytobe1981
by on Apr. 21, 2014 at 8:24 AM
Yes. If he never wanted kid he should have gotten a vasectomy.
Caitlin10081989
by Ruby Member on Apr. 21, 2014 at 4:35 PM


Quoting Karmahappens:


Quoting Caitlin10081989:

NO, he should NOT have to pay child support. 

 But the child support is for the child-who is totally blameless in all of this.

The child is blameless. The mom is the one to blame and needs to take care of her child all by herself. 

withsecond
by on Apr. 21, 2014 at 5:58 PM

Any time you have sex, you run the risk of getting pregnant (or in his case, getting someone pregnant) So yes, he should have to pay. 

Of course, she's shady as fuck for doing that. 

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