Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

The CafeMom Newcomers Club The CafeMom Newcomers Club

SAHM annoyed

Posted by on Apr. 25, 2014 at 11:44 PM
  • 12 Replies

This is the third time Ive tried writing a post and I get kicked off....I'm going to type fast! Sorry for spelling errors, using spell check is when I got booted.

I am a SAHM since my son was born August 2010. I have a 14 yr old daughter from a previous marriage. I went to college and worked in the medical field in between. I live in the city and have recently made the decision with my country mouse husband to move to a small town. The small town is where he is from originally, his parents still reside there. As I was told by my husband, everyone knows everyone, everyone knows (almost) everything about everyone and word spreads like wildfire. I;m feeling a bit stressed as I am accustomed to neighbors being strangers and no one paying any mind to who I am most of the time. I made this decision as I am wound a little too tight! I thought that getting out of the hustle and bustle and crime ridden city where I hear sirens daily wound do me some good. I felt I may be a lot more adaptable than my husband who doesn't care for city living. 

Since I have stayed at home with my son, I have heard all kinds of remarks. Whether they thought it was admirable in this day and age, to, "it must be nice", to "I couldn't handle that!".  Well, whatever. It was our choice and just how things worked out for us. So anyway, as I said news spreads like wildfire in our future small town. Before I've even hada chance to pack a dish or a book....I've been bombarded with inquires if I would consider baby-sitting so and so's children since I'm at home anyway and I could probably use some extra cash. Ummm....I'm not sure how to feel. I felt annoyed, a little insulted, like gee why not I just sit around doing nothing anyway! The thing is I don't want to baby sit. Just because I chose to stay at home with my children doesn't mean I want to stay at home with someone else's all day everyday. Otherwise, if I did, I would run a daycare... I don't know how to say no. I don't really know these people, I've never been officially introduced. They are friends of my husbands and I'm sure I'll see them regularly. It just felt a little presumptuous to assume I'd agree  to care for someone's kids because I'm there anyway. 

by on Apr. 25, 2014 at 11:44 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
3xangel
by Ruby Member on Apr. 25, 2014 at 11:46 PM
Just say no. It's really that simple.
Ryanswifey42012
by Member on Apr. 25, 2014 at 11:54 PM
I agree. It's not your job to care for other people's children. You chose to stay home with your kids because it's what works for your family but it's different when you are watching someone else's kids.
Ryanswifey42012
by Member on Apr. 25, 2014 at 11:54 PM
I agree. It's not your job to care for other people's children. You chose to stay home with your kids because it's what works for your family but it's different when you are watching someone else's kids.
Mom2Squared
by Member on Apr. 25, 2014 at 11:56 PM
Just politely say, "I chose not to work so I could have the flexibility of time with my son and not be working. I want to spend these years with him before he's off to school. Once he goes to school, I'll be using my degree in X for X career."

That may not be your exact situation but you get the point. ;) do not start doing that. Trust me. Just say NO.
Justine1993
by Member on Apr. 26, 2014 at 12:09 AM
Just say no. U don't need to make excuses just say ur not interested. I've had friends ask me to watch their kids and I've told them no I don't need the extra cash and I'm not into dealing with other peoples kids where I can't discipline them the way I do my own kids.
jconney80
by Platinum Member on Apr. 26, 2014 at 1:52 AM
Welcome to the group =) I would just say no. You don't need to give a reason. I wouldn't do it either!
LucasMommy75
by Member on Apr. 26, 2014 at 7:24 AM
It's quite simple, no. Why should you just because you're home.
Pink.Frosting
by Silver Member on Apr. 26, 2014 at 7:28 AM
Say no. Keep saying it until they leave you alone. Become good friends with the word no.
karrahM
by on Apr. 26, 2014 at 7:29 AM

Generic answer for everything you don't want to do. I don't think so.

no apologies, no explanations.

i don't think so.

jillplustwo
by Member on Apr. 26, 2014 at 7:42 AM
Be careful who you trust when you move. If someone tells you gossip they will gossip about you. Small towns are nice but try to stay far away from drama and dramatic people. You'll be fine. It's nice to have a lot of family close by to help. It may take getting used to if they are over bearing you'll want to set some boundaries. Good luck!!
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)