DH and I have been on the verge of divorce. We are in therapy, but have gotten to a place where we act normal and even have fun together but nothing is fixed. He isn't sure he wants to try to fix anything. I am lost now though and don't know wha to do...
Yesterday my DH made my Mother's Day beautiful and memorable. We have been on the rocks and yesterday was great. There was just one problem. Everytime I tried to hold his hand, flirt with him, or be affectionate, he rejected me. It was like we were BEST FRIENDS all day and that part was so much fun, but at the end of the day was his reminder that he is not ready to move forward with me.
He has stated through therapy that he has felt as though i never really loved him, and ever since I have been trying to show him that I really truly do and always have. I have read the 5 love languages, I figured out his love language, I am trying to use that. I have done about a million things to try to get the affection back, and I always end up feeling hurt and rejected. Now I feel like I AM the least important thing to him. I am sad. He is uninterested in trying to get things on track between us, but still seems happy to "hang out" as friends.and that makes me feel awful. I have been the one trying for months now, when do I get to be loved? I go along, trying to show him how I feel, then I get really confident that things are going well so I go in for a hug or kiss and end up feeling hurt at the end of it because I get nothing in return. Then I pull myself back together and it starts all over again. He has stopped going to therapy. We went for 2 mohths. i am still going and still askin ghim to join me.
What should I do? Talking doesn't work with him, he doesn't hear me. I could write to him, maybe he would read it. I could just stop trying and see where that gets us. He seems to need a jolt.
Or I could leave him, but I would hate that. I do still love him and our little family, but I am not stupid and won't just stay like this forever. I just don't think I am at the point of leaving yet. But I am at the point of not knowing what to do now.