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Am I wrong for not changing my child's name?

Posted by on Jun. 3, 2014 at 4:54 PM
  • 49 Replies
My sons name is Beckett. Has been since I was 20 weeks pregnant. The problem is his dad didn't want anything to do with the pregnancy or Beckett until he was 6 weeks old. At six weeks he began tormenting me saying that I needed to change the name, because he is biracial and Beckett is "too white". I'm white, his dad is half black. Beckett is now 8 months old, and I think the name has grown on him already, but his dad still REFUSES to call him by his name. He says Beckett will get teased in school, and that he's going to want to go by something else when he is older, and that I can't possibly understand what he will go thru because I am white.
I can understand his point, but do I want the first life lesson i teach my son to be to conform in fear of being teased? Honestly I don't believe he will get teased, we live in an area where biracial kids are not uncommon. I also fear that his dad will put the idea in his head later on that the name is a bad one, and that he's too "white" for going by it. Am I wrong for not wanting to change his name? Or should I continue to stand my ground and just ignore his fathers constant remarks about it?
by on Jun. 3, 2014 at 4:54 PM
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Replies (1-10):
invisibleme
by Member on Jun. 3, 2014 at 4:55 PM
3 moms liked this

Your childs father sounds like a jerk. I'd tell him to get over himself.

BMM0508
by Member on Jun. 3, 2014 at 4:57 PM
4 moms liked this
Dont change his name. Dads a douche.
Malayahsmom06
by on Jun. 3, 2014 at 5:29 PM
He sounds like a douche bag.
KyliesMom5
by Platinum Member on Jun. 3, 2014 at 5:31 PM
Don't change his name.
thatgirl70
by Carin on Jun. 3, 2014 at 6:28 PM
5 moms liked this
I'd tell him tough luck, he had a chance to be involved with the naming decision when he found out you were pregnant.
Sjwool
by on Jun. 3, 2014 at 6:58 PM
Thanks y'all! He has just made me feel like I am completely arrogant for not changing it. At first I was pretty straightforward with my "hell no" but after time of him not letting it go, I have started to second guess my opinion. Thanks for your support!
waitingonmila
by Member on Jun. 3, 2014 at 6:59 PM
2 moms liked this
Wow and people say white people are racist over judging names.. Really Beckett is too white? Well I guess if he wanted a say in the name he shouldn't have chose to be a deadbeat until now.
elasmimi
by Platinum Member on Jun. 3, 2014 at 7:24 PM
1 mom liked this

Amen!

Quoting thatgirl70: I'd tell him tough luck, he had a chance to be involved with the naming decision when he found out you were pregnant.


A1OnTheRun
by New Member on Jun. 4, 2014 at 8:05 AM
2 moms liked this

Good job on standing your ground. I hope for your and Becket's sake that he loosens up and goes with it and becomes a good father.

I'm sure if Beckett finds out the story of his name when he is older, he'll see you as an even stronger and more loving mom. All the best to you and your family.

onethentwins
by Silver Member on Jun. 4, 2014 at 5:09 PM
2 moms liked this

Tell his father that you disagree that the name Beckett sounds too white and will cause him to be teased. Tell him that you will not be bullied into changing it and to drop it. 

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