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Do you have a hard time saying 'NO'?

Posted by on Dec. 4, 2014 at 9:45 AM
  • 20 Replies

Sometimes it's really hard to say no, especially to certain people.   I can say no to my ex-husband, no problem.  But saying no to my mom, or my boss, or my kids, that's much harder!

Do you have a hard time saying no to anyone?  Why do you think that is?

by on Dec. 4, 2014 at 9:45 AM
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Replies (1-10):
jewels.unicorn
by Member on Dec. 4, 2014 at 9:59 AM

 I do too...

It's because we are worried about disappointing them. I don't get a ton of time do hang out with my kids, so when they ask to do something with me, I have a terrible time saying No because I feel guilty.

Dh's saying is, if you are only looking for a Yes answer, then don't bother asking if you think there's a chance you'll get a No answer. We say this to the kids all the time b/c they get their nose out of joint when you say No to them.

So then we say, well, are we just supposed to say Yes to everything & let you do whatever you want? No? Oh, so why do you get mad when we say No then? They usually don't have a very good answer, lol

CharlotteRose
by Charlotte on Dec. 4, 2014 at 10:07 AM
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I do and then I feel really pissed at myself for not saying no.  I can't stand conflict so its better just to say yes at the time and fume afterwards which I know its all on me and not that person but I do know that others will advantage of my generousity and that's my fault.

Hazeleyes79
by on Dec. 4, 2014 at 10:08 AM
I have a hard time saying NO as well. I think it's because im always nice and dont want to hurt or disappoint anybody. I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings.
Reese2010727
by Silver Member on Dec. 4, 2014 at 10:11 AM
1 mom liked this

No, I had to learn the hard way how to say no. I'll tell anyone no in a heartbeat now.

Pixi-goddess
by on Dec. 4, 2014 at 10:17 AM
I can't tell my hubby no or my kids... it's not because of guilt for me though... it's because of the love I have for them. For my husband it's because he cares for us and takes care of us and rarely requests anything special other than in the bedroom... and who can say no to such a sexy man?
My kids I can't say no to when it makes them happy. Now there are times when we can't do it at the moment but we make plans to do it and put it on the calender and save up for it or when we have the time needed to do it.
Our kids are with us for only a short while before they leave home and adventure out on their own... so I try and teach them that yes they can have what they want in life, but you can't always have it right then... sometimes you have to plan it out and work towards the goal.
Bmat
by Emerald Member on Dec. 4, 2014 at 11:11 AM
2 moms liked this

I am getting better at it. I really hate for people to be sad, but I've learned to not do what I don't want to, if I can help it.

Hottmomma607
by Trica on Dec. 4, 2014 at 4:03 PM
I do sometimes,I really try not to be taken of advantage of.

Quoting Bmat:

I am getting better at it. I really hate for people to be sad, but I've learned to not do what I don't want to, if I can help it.

DACIA79
by Silver Member on Dec. 4, 2014 at 4:05 PM
1 mom liked this
I'm very good at saying NO.
amonkeymom
by Platinum Member on Dec. 4, 2014 at 4:12 PM
1 mom liked this

Yes, that's it.  I don't want to disappoint them, I'm a people pleaser by nature.

Quoting jewels.unicorn:

 I do too...

It's because we are worried about disappointing them. I don't get a ton of time do hang out with my kids, so when they ask to do something with me, I have a terrible time saying No because I feel guilty.

Dh's saying is, if you are only looking for a Yes answer, then don't bother asking if you think there's a chance you'll get a No answer. We say this to the kids all the time b/c they get their nose out of joint when you say No to them.

So then we say, well, are we just supposed to say Yes to everything & let you do whatever you want? No? Oh, so why do you get mad when we say No then? They usually don't have a very good answer, lol


amonkeymom
by Platinum Member on Dec. 4, 2014 at 4:12 PM
1 mom liked this

LOL!  I agree, sometimes saying yes is the lesser of the evils.

Quoting CharlotteRose:

I do and then I feel really pissed at myself for not saying no.  I can't stand conflict so its better just to say yes at the time and fume afterwards which I know its all on me and not that person but I do know that others will advantage of my generousity and that's my fault.


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