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Am I Over Reacting ????

Posted by on Nov. 28, 2016 at 1:21 AM
  • 25 Replies

I have a 13 year old daughter from an ex boyfriend, who married another woman who had two boys and was pregnant with another man's baby.   They married, and then divorced 5 yearrs later due to her abuse and her cheating on my ex boyfriend.   Anyways,  Here it is a few years later, and he took her back again.   She is living in his two bedroom mobile home with her four kids.  All boys.  The oldest is 17, then 15, 13 and 8.    The 8 year old is my daughters step brother.  The 13 year old is a boy that stuck a toy knife up my daughter anus when they were 6 years old.  (This was investigated by CPS and found that it wasn't "abuse" but they were playing "doctor".  )   My daughters father was very close to this boy until his divorce from her mother and never believed that it happened.  Anyways,  fast forward time... 

They are living in my exes 2 bedroom mobile home. 

The three boys who are not related to her are all teenaged boys.  Teenage boys = hormones. 

My 13 year old daughter told my 21 year old daughter, that when she was there for Thanksgiving, she has three of the youngest boys staying in her bedroom at her dad's.  She said that the 15 year old was masturbating in the same room as her and was making moaning noises.   The 15 year old boy  is mentally disabled and about 3 weeks ago, tried to stick skewers up their two dogs noses.   OY VEY!  

Anyways,  my daughter was supposed to go with her dad this weekend and got VERY snotty and rude on the phone to him.   (This was before I knew about the whole masturbating thing).   

Shouldn't my daughter, since she's the ONLY girl have her own bedroom to herself?   A safe place away from the boys? 

And the masturbating thing...   I know that it's normal for a boy to do that, but in same room as a girl?? 

My daughter was clearly upset about it. 

My only fear, and this may be crazy sounding... But I'm afraid that he's going to try to have sex with my daughter.   

I've already had a chat with her dad three weeks ago about making sure that Isabel had her own room to escape the boys, but apparently this isn't working. 

What would you do?? And how would you feel about the masturbating thing in the same room as your daughter? 

and no... I'm not a prude.   

UPDATE: I called CPS and they said that they'd choose whether or not they'll investigate.  I haven't heard anything back frtom them.   They said that they'd talk to my daughter at school, but they haven't yet.   It's five days.  :(    

by on Nov. 28, 2016 at 1:21 AM
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Replies (1-10):
by Member on Nov. 28, 2016 at 6:56 AM
2 moms liked this

None of this is okay, she cannot stay over there without her own room, or space, get a lawyer.

by on Nov. 28, 2016 at 6:58 AM
Get a lawyer. And stop sending her for visitations.
by Carrie on Nov. 28, 2016 at 9:04 AM
1 mom liked this
I wouldn't send here there anymore.
by Member on Nov. 28, 2016 at 9:17 AM
1 mom liked this
I would take it to court to make it whete she has to have her own room when at dads house. and until it happens she will not stay the night there. You are not a prude you are being a good mother and protecting you Daughter.
by Platinum Member on Nov. 28, 2016 at 2:14 PM
Not overreacting at all dad needs to get a bigger place or kick the woman and her children out or give her x amount of time to find a place to live.
by on Nov. 28, 2016 at 3:22 PM
Either tell him to get rid of the girlfriend and kids or tell her yourself that you don't want her kids or her Around your daughter so figure out where to go get supervised visitation only or get it in court that she needs her own room or she won't be going over there
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by Sapphire Member on Nov. 28, 2016 at 3:36 PM

I agree on her own room,
That being said I wouldn't be letting my 13 year old dd go at all ..

by on Nov. 28, 2016 at 3:38 PM

NONE of this is ok! You aren't overreacting at all! I wouldn't allow her to stay there.

by on Nov. 30, 2016 at 10:57 AM
1 mom liked this
That is a horrible situation to put your daughter in. And if her dad isn't going to protect her and make her feel safe then that's up to you. Maybe she just visits and doesn't stay the night until and unless she is able to have a room to herself.
by on Nov. 30, 2016 at 10:59 AM

I would have concerns too....I agree with separate rooms.

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