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Moving to another state; help on advice please and thank you

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My boyfriend, me, our 21 month old daughter and my boyfriends dad is moving to another state in about 3 weeks. Moving away from our family and friends for the first time in our lives. How would I go about talking and explaining that to my daughter? She's young yes but she's at an age where she understands. I just don't know how i'd talk about it to and with her.. any advice please anyone
by on Dec. 27, 2017 at 2:59 AM
Replies (11-16):
lancet98
by Bronze Member on Jan. 4, 2018 at 8:59 AM

Things must be just magical over at your place, LOL.

Absolutely, a 20 month old realizes she's somewhere new.   Little ones have a very good understanding of familiar vs unfamiliar.  They may not understand 'mommy had to move to get a job' or whatever the reason was, or 'this town is 200 miles away from that one' or 'we'll stay here for the forseeable future', or any of that jazz, but they absolutely know that a place is familiar or unfamiliar.

Mom going into a familiar story about it again and again helps kids immensely to relax and be reassured.

I've seen it happen.  Again and again and again.

Quoting boymom2014: You're making a bigger deal than it is. She's a year and a half not 12 with 5 best friends. Just pack up and go. There's nothing to say. If she was like 3 then maybe but she's not even 2. Just say soon we will be at a new house with your new room. Don't over think the situation
Quoting binfinitlee: My boyfriend, me, our 21 month old daughter and my boyfriends dad is moving to another state in about 3 weeks. Moving away from our family and friends for the first time in our lives. How would I go about talking and explaining that to my daughter? She's young yes but she's at an age where she understands. I just don't know how i'd talk about it to and with her.. any advice please anyone


virginiamama71
by Carrie on Jan. 4, 2018 at 9:03 AM
But we don't have to go into too much about it at that age. Just say we're moving to another home and leave it. Older children may need more because they are leaving more behind.

Quoting lancet98:

Things must be just magical over at your place, LOL.

Absolutely, a 20 month old realizes she's somewhere new.   Little ones have a very good understanding of familiar vs unfamiliar.  They may not understand 'mommy had to move to get a job' or whatever the reason was, or 'this town is 200 miles away from that one' or 'we'll stay here for the forseeable future', or any of that jazz, but they absolutely know that a place is familiar or unfamiliar.

Mom going into a familiar story about it again and again helps kids immensely to relax and be reassured.

I've seen it happen.  Again and again and again.

Quoting boymom2014: You're making a bigger deal than it is. She's a year and a half not 12 with 5 best friends. Just pack up and go. There's nothing to say. If she was like 3 then maybe but she's not even 2. Just say soon we will be at a new house with your new room. Don't over think the situation



Quoting binfinitlee: My boyfriend, me, our 21 month old daughter and my boyfriends dad is moving to another state in about 3 weeks. Moving away from our family and friends for the first time in our lives. How would I go about talking and explaining that to my daughter? She's young yes but she's at an age where she understands. I just don't know how i'd talk about it to and with her.. any advice please anyone

boymom2014
by on Jan. 4, 2018 at 11:46 AM
1 mom liked this
It's not about being magical it's just it was nothing to over talk obsess on or harp on. We moved apartments when our son was 1 and a half and didn't even have to say anything besides are you excited for our new place. I didn't have to do this long drawn out thing . He's not over sensitive as this kid is obviously. It's not a huge deal as this mom is making it

Quoting lancet98:

Things must be just magical over at your place, LOL.

Absolutely, a 20 month old realizes she's somewhere new.   Little ones have a very good understanding of familiar vs unfamiliar.  They may not understand 'mommy had to move to get a job' or whatever the reason was, or 'this town is 200 miles away from that one' or 'we'll stay here for the forseeable future', or any of that jazz, but they absolutely know that a place is familiar or unfamiliar.

Mom going into a familiar story about it again and again helps kids immensely to relax and be reassured.

I've seen it happen.  Again and again and again.

Quoting boymom2014: You're making a bigger deal than it is. She's a year and a half not 12 with 5 best friends. Just pack up and go. There's nothing to say. If she was like 3 then maybe but she's not even 2. Just say soon we will be at a new house with your new room. Don't over think the situation

Quoting binfinitlee: My boyfriend, me, our 21 month old daughter and my boyfriends dad is moving to another state in about 3 weeks. Moving away from our family and friends for the first time in our lives. How would I go about talking and explaining that to my daughter? She's young yes but she's at an age where she understands. I just don't know how i'd talk about it to and with her.. any advice please anyone

binfinitlee
by New Member on Jan. 21, 2018 at 11:16 AM
yeah my child is sensitive and so what if she is. and probably way smarter and more understanding than your kid, obviously. i just asked for simple help in how to tell my child and you step in and put your 2 cents where it doesn’t belong. no one asked for your negativity so you shouldn’t have posted a comment on this post trend.
if you must know it took a huge toll on her. loss of appetite, clinginess, along with other things. because well she UNDERSTANDS WHATS GOING ON more than most kids her age.
but thank you whoever else for your help and positivity. as to all you other negative people, your children are probably not as advanced as my child is at 21 months old and that’s that.
bye now

Quoting boymom2014: It's not about being magical it's just it was nothing to over talk obsess on or harp on. We moved apartments when our son was 1 and a half and didn't even have to say anything besides are you excited for our new place. I didn't have to do this long drawn out thing . He's not over sensitive as this kid is obviously. It's not a huge deal as this mom is making it

Quoting lancet98:

Things must be just magical over at your place, LOL.

Absolutely, a 20 month old realizes she's somewhere new.   Little ones have a very good understanding of familiar vs unfamiliar.  They may not understand 'mommy had to move to get a job' or whatever the reason was, or 'this town is 200 miles away from that one' or 'we'll stay here for the forseeable future', or any of that jazz, but they absolutely know that a place is familiar or unfamiliar.

Mom going into a familiar story about it again and again helps kids immensely to relax and be reassured.

I've seen it happen.  Again and again and again.

Quoting boymom2014: You're making a bigger deal than it is. She's a year and a half not 12 with 5 best friends. Just pack up and go. There's nothing to say. If she was like 3 then maybe but she's not even 2. Just say soon we will be at a new house with your new room. Don't over think the situation

Quoting binfinitlee: My boyfriend, me, our 21 month old daughter and my boyfriends dad is moving to another state in about 3 weeks. Moving away from our family and friends for the first time in our lives. How would I go about talking and explaining that to my daughter? She's young yes but she's at an age where she understands. I just don't know how i'd talk about it to and with her.. any advice please anyone

2004_2006_mommy
by on Jan. 21, 2018 at 5:54 PM
1 mom liked this

My boyfriend & our 13 year old son,11 year old daughter recently moved to another state,I have only lived in one place my entire life except the year I moved to Texas when I was 11,other than that I was born and lived 15 minutes away from the hospital I was born at,even my kids were going to the same school's as me and my siblings did,also even had some of the same teachers as I did,my kids are older & I thought it would be tough to move but they have adjusted very very well,better than I thought...

Your daughter is a lot younger than my kids,I would just explain to her that You are moving but You will be able to still talk to friends & family members,do You have a phone that does face time,a computer ?,she can draw pictures & mail them to family members,I don't really have any other advice for You,hope that helps...

Good Luck with your move

silverbuttons
by Member on Jan. 21, 2018 at 6:38 PM
1 mom liked this

She will do fine as long as the adults around her stay positive and see this as a good thing.  Negative emotions will definitely make her anxious.  Talk about what you are doing when you are packing, etc, but don’t overdo it.  She can easily get on overload.  Be matter of fact and calm.  GL

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