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when daddies become the problem

Posted by on Jun. 14, 2007 at 8:53 PM
  • 6 Replies

my son is seven months. my boyfriend thinks its okay to teach him to bite, pinch nd pull hair which are habits of most babies. but lucas is ten times worst because antonio will bring him up to ppl and tell him to grab there hair or stick his finger in his mouth and tell him bite. and its hard to tell the baby no when the daddy said it was okay i dont know what to do i have tried to explain to antonio that u cant teach him that because it will be hard to break later  any ideas beacause it is causing problems and i dont want my son to act like my cousins kids that have no rules and behave horrible they hit and bite and hurt each other it is really bad please anybody how else can i explain it to my boyfriend that he is going to cause a bigger problem in the future

by on Jun. 14, 2007 at 8:53 PM
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by on Jun. 14, 2007 at 10:10 PM

You are absolutely right.....and have the right to be concerned.

I am a teacher and I see it all the time..... kids are misbehaving and their parents are standing right there not saying a word!!!

I was on a field trip and I had to tell a child 7 times not to kneel on the seats of the bus and hang over the sides....and he was sitting next to his father!!!

At conferences the dad told me that he is on top of the behavior and doesn't let him get away with anything.

No wonder I have to tell him 100 times a day to stop doing things-  he does what he wants and his parents don't stop him!

Sorry about the rant, and I am on your side with this..... we see it all the time... kids that misbehave in minor ways in first grade get into real trouble by junior high if parents don't set boundries.

You are right- it starts sinking in when they are young.

Can you talk to your boyfriends mom about this??? maybe she can help him see the light about these seemingly harmless behaviors.....just a thought.

by on Jun. 16, 2007 at 2:31 PM
his mom doesnt speak any english we can communicate but not much because i am still learning spanish :(
by on Jun. 16, 2007 at 2:36 PM
Cant your boyfriend think of something more constructive to teach his son? Like playing with cars or talking to him so speaking comes easier to him later on; take him to the park. Explain to your b/f that teaching your son those bad habits will get him kicked right out of any preschool or day care if it continues!
by on Jun. 16, 2007 at 2:38 PM
I have an older brother like that !
He tried to teach his boys nasty habits and ugly things to do;
the best thing he ever did for them was let another guy raise them (because they turned out pretty good).

So he tries to teach any little ones he's around now these nasty things.
I yell and gripe at him as well as does others; but nothing phases him.
He thinks it's cool & funny.
He is now pushing 50 ---

Good Afternoon;
by on Jun. 16, 2007 at 5:04 PM
The only thing I can think to tell you is sit down with him and explain why your are concerned and tell him that by doing this he is making to where your son could be mean and not know how to be with other kids later on.
by on Jun. 16, 2007 at 5:57 PM
Wow I saw there was 100 views but 5 replies. Hmm ... well wow! I have to say that first! And I want to ask u, what is his explination as to why he is teaching ur kid this? I cant believe anyone in their right mind would teach their child this. As for what to do?? Well ... I'd ask him one more time not to do this! Oh wait ... u said he is ur bf ... but is he the childs father? If not, I would leave him if he kept doing that anyways when he shouldnt. Its not like ur trying to control him ...its that he SHOULDNT be teaching ur son that. The long term consequnces can be bad. Like a trouble child in school who is always fighting etc. If he is the father ... its so hard to say .... I mean its like u almost have to chose ur son or ur bf. If it were me, I would chose my son!

My husband said that he was going to teach our son how to box so he can beat kids up in school who were bothering him (if so). Well I think not! And it will NOT happen in my home! Hopefully I wont have to come to that bridge and he was just full of it.
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