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Thoughts/opinions on problem I am having with my baby shower.

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I would like to get some thoughts/opinions on a problem I am having.  My baby shower is planned for the end of this month (I am due may 3rd).  My shower is going to be  small close family/friend at a nice restaurant.   My Friend just had a baby. Her baby daughter will be 3 months at the time of my shower (I am also the god-mother).   She asked me if it was okay to bring her daughter to the shower, since she is nursing and said that she is having a problem finding the time to pump (she does not work either).  I told her yes, because I was caught off guard when she asked me.  Now after thinking about it more and more, I don't think that it is right for her to bring her.  Not to be selfish or anything, but the day is suppose to be about my baby, not hers.  You know that people will be oooing and ahhing over her daughter (thats what people do with babys).  I am really bothered by this, I think her daughter is old enough that she can leave her for a couple of hours with her husband.  Please don't think that I am being selfish, I am just really bothered by this and want to say something in a nice way to her.  My friend is really consumed by her daughter and will not  put her down or will not leave the house, which worries me too.  I would love some thoughts on this or if I am wrong for thinking this, I can't even sleep!!
Thanks for any help!!

by on Mar. 6, 2007 at 5:39 PM
Replies (11-14):
newmome
by on Mar. 6, 2007 at 6:42 PM
I don't think she'll get offended if you tell her that she can't bring the baby.  It will only be for a couple of hours, and she should be considerate enough to pump her a couple of bottles so that she doesn't have to bring her.  All the baby showers I have gone too have all requested that children be left at home. I understand how you feel, my shower is next weekend and a couple of my friends have small kids.  I didn't put the rule out that they aren't allowed but I really hope that they don't bring them.  Kids can't sit still for long periods of time besides you can't let them go to just run around and play either.  This is a day to celebrate your baby coming, I'm sure she'll understand. 
MAMA50
by on Mar. 7, 2007 at 6:44 PM
WE JUST HAD A SHOWER FOR MY DAUGHTER-IN-LAW  AND HER RELATIVES BROUGHT THEIR CHILDREN/BABIES.  REMEMBER THAT THIS IS A SHOWER FOR YOU!  YES...WE HELD THE BABIES BUT WHEN IT WAS TIME TO OPEN THE GIFTS WE ALL SAT AROUND & OOHED & AAHED AT WHAT SHE REC'D. 
mom2bys99
by on Mar. 7, 2007 at 6:53 PM


I am not good at this sort of thing either.  I would say though you need to just talk to her.  You don't want to be unhappy at your shower. If she truely is your friend she will understand.  You shouldn't let this fester though. You don't want to resent your friend.  As far as her not leaving her baby.  It can be hard to do for a first time Mom.  I do agree with you though she should be able to leave her for a couple of hours to attend you shower. Everybody needs a break.
MonicaJaye
by on Mar. 7, 2007 at 7:01 PM
I think you're over-reacting.  Sure her baby will get some attention but, the bottom line is your family and friends are coming for YOU.  Trust me, all of the events will be centered around you and based on that, I would be surprised if you would feel slighted in any way.  Just enjoy yourself and don't worry about your friend and her baby getting some attention.  Look at it this way, as new moms, it's rare that we get a chance to go out and be comfortable.  This will allow her to not only celebrate the birth of YOUR baby, but also allow her to be with one of her best friends and family in the presence of her new love.  I hope this helps.  Please let us know how it goes!
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