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omg shes so wrong!!!

Posted by on Jun. 17, 2007 at 4:41 AM
  • 49 Replies
when i was bf i wasn't taking prenatals enough and drinking water enough so my daughter was losing weight...a friend of mine, well right now i don't feel like she is my friend but she says shes a better mother than i am b/c she is bf and i'm not...i started formula feeding to help her so who is really the better mother? breast feeding is the best choice but if you can't do it you can't do it...and if you tried at least you tried...some mothers don't try at all or can't...so being a bfing mother doesn't nessciarlly mean your a better one then formula feeding ones...me and my brother were formula fed and we are perfectly fine...so i've said my peace...let me know if i am being parinoid about this...i mean i have been at her house and my 4 month daughter will eat like 2 or 3 times in like 8 hrs before her month old daughter will once...i mean "its formula not rat posion"

so who is really the better mother?
by on Jun. 17, 2007 at 4:41 AM
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Replies (1-10):
candelariaymia
by on Jun. 17, 2007 at 4:46 AM
I can't believe the arrogance of some people!!! If anything, you're the better mom because you're actually DOING something about your daughter's not getting enough to gain weight. Don't listen to her!!! Some mothers are so insecure about themselves that they try to compete with others to make themselves feel better about their child-rearing skills. I'd sever ties with her...shes obviously got some sort of superiority complex. Believe me, I've got a lot of people around me with the same attitude. If you need true friends you can talk to, write me any time!! Good luck

Candace and Mia
dianedenise
by on Jun. 17, 2007 at 4:57 AM
     I tried to breastfeed my second baby but he wouldn't have anything to do with it.... They kept telling me to hang in there and don't give up because sooner or later he would catch on. They told me to not feed him formula just water. We did this for about 5 days, and I was freaking out.... finally I went to the WIC office, and told them I just wanted to go ahead and do formula because he wasn't getting it.... the WIC nurse took me in a private room to see if she could help make some suggestions, and just watched me try again. My baby just cried so she said I was making the right decision putting him on formual. He would have starved to death if I wouldn't have. What I'm trying to say is breastfeeding doesn't always work for everyone so don't feel bad, it's ok.... there's nothing wrong with formula.... you're baby will get what he/she needs from the formula. My baby is a strong, healthy 15 year old that outweighs his older brother, and his father. He plays football, and is very active. He is never sick so formula didn't hurt him.......
jomi
by on Jun. 17, 2007 at 8:36 AM
 I do agree that your friend was wrong to say that your a bad  mother for starting your baby on formula. There are times when a woman's body just doesn't have the nutrients the baby needs from breastmilk or the child can't latch on. So you did what you had to do for the health of your child and that was great. But why go and stoop to her level by making her feel bad by asking a question of "who's baby is more cute?". Now that was wrong. All babies look wrinkled and slimy when they come out, and then you show yours nice and clean. Yes, she hurt your feelings, but don't you think that the pictures would hurt her? Be the bigger person, and let the issue go. You know you done the right thing for your child, isn't that the important part? We should come to this site to help and build each other up, not tear down.
Blessedbymany
by on Jun. 17, 2007 at 8:42 AM
Neither of you is the "better" mother. You both want what's best for your child & have (probably) the same goals ... to raise your children to be productive members of society & to keep them safe. It's just that you're getting there in different ways. Don't let your friend tell you anything. You tried, did your best ... she needs to get over it.

~ RETTA ~

Click on the above name for an IMPORTANT message

amyhatcher
by on Jun. 17, 2007 at 8:52 AM
NO MOTHER is a BAD MOTHER- just misinformed... as long as you play that game of who is better... neither of you will be happy.  If I were you I would ween myself from this "friend" and start a new. 
BikerLiker
by on Jun. 17, 2007 at 8:53 AM
I Breastfed both of my boys to give them a bigger advantage over formula. But let me tell you just because I did that does not give me or anyone else room to criticize you. Love doesn't just come from your Breast. Love for a Child is a WHOLE body experience...Unless you are throwing that kid around...or the opposite not touching your child at all now that's a bad mother...what you have is a "BAD FRIEND"!
soon2bemommyof4
by on Jun. 17, 2007 at 9:02 AM

Quoting wolfess16:

Whos cuter??
Trinity when she was born

My daughter Trinity a few weeks ago



Her daughter when she was born
I personally think that both babies are cute. I couldnt say who is "cuter". what does cute have to do with bfing and ffing?

Jenae
mom2jared
by on Jun. 17, 2007 at 9:03 AM
When my son was born, I tried to breastfeed him and he just would latch on to me.  so I put him on formula.  I dont think that breastfed babies are better than formula babies.  I hate when people say that breastfed babies are better.  I think there is no difference.  Don't let someone tell you that their child is better than yours.    My son is six years old now and he is doing great having been on formula.  
OKmomma
by on Jun. 17, 2007 at 10:04 AM
Did she really say 'i'm a better mother than you", or did she imply it?  I'm just curious, I can't imagine someone saying that, how arrogant!  If she said that than she's a bad friend.  Even if she implied it, you need to let her know that if b/f is all she has to be proud of then she's got problems.  I was similar w/ my first child.  I tried, i really did!  But he was a premie, in the hospital for two weeks and was given a bottle.  When I got him home I couldn't get him to latch on, granted I probably gave up to soon, but I didn't know what i was doing.   I continued to pump milk to feed him, but eventually it dried up because i wasn't pumping enough.  It was hard to find time to pump every 2 hours, then feed the baby, then take care of the baby.  With my second baby I was at a different hospital and I had a lot of support and I've been much more successful. 

As for the pictures, I gotta say that was a little petty.  All babies are cute and it has nothing to do with b/f or f/f. 
mommyoftwo0306
by on Jun. 17, 2007 at 11:36 AM

I was going to breastfeed but my son was too small,I had to use the pump and that hurt like hell,both of my children were formula fed and my son is advanced for his age,he will be 4 in july and has only had 1 cold his whole life,my daughter just turned a yr old and she is as healthy as can be,so tell your friend to bite ya.

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