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PLEASE HELP WITH ADVICE

Posted by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 3:13 PM
  • 15 Replies
I have 3 kids already...a 13 yr old daughter and 8 year old son from my first marriage and a now almost 5 month old son with my current husband...Current hubby has no other kids and is  younger than me...I am now 35 yrs old and we are considering having one more before I run too high a risk because of my age and because we want a closer age gap between them...Had a miscarriage between my older two hence the age diff and for obvious reasons there is a large age gap now between my older 2 and the baby. Do you all think I am nuts for wanting a 4th? and secondly How do I handle a little one and a baby at the same time? I have never had to do that...ANY ADVICE IS WELCOME
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 3:13 PM
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Replies (1-10):
allyizhere
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 3:20 PM
Well, I don't think you are crazy.... but I am 38 just had my first who is 6 mo old and plan to have AT LEAST one more.  I would like my children two years apart... so I am waiting a bit before getting pregnant. 

The high risk part sucks, but my pregnancy was great, doctors are a pain, but I had no issues.  Just so you know the percentages are still low for problems with pregnancy even us "older" mommies.
jncwillis
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 3:22 PM
I want 4 kids and all my friends tell me im insane.. lol.. im glad im not the only insane person out there.. my opion is as long as you can take care of them and love them the way they need.. then go for it!! I know i want 4.. just make sure your ready.. not everyone else!!
mamabeth4180
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 3:22 PM
i don't think you are crazy. If you feel like you can handle it then you should go for it. my two are 15mo apart and it was actually pretty easy. It was also easier being pregnant when ds was so young compared to being pregnant now when they are 3 and4. Good luck on your decision and you have a few kids already so you know the ropes =D
mommyfive
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 3:25 PM
i dont think your nuts my oldest is 20 i also have a 17 a 13 a 8.i got remarried in jan to a man who is 9 years younger than me and he has custody of his now 2 year old daughter.and in nov we will add one more to the family. so no i dont think your nuts.
missourimommy
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 3:25 PM
I don't think you are insane for wanting another child. I say go for it I support you.
ilovebopbear
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 3:27 PM
I dont think you are nuts I think you are a mother with alot of love to give.  My two are 11 months apart and I LOVE IT!!!!  When Alex was born Ethan was still in diapers and bottles and a crib.  I just continued what I was doing every day.  They were potty trained together, weened off bottles and binkys together and both got big boy beds at thesame time.  It was kind of like twins, ok alot like twins.  And even today they are 5 and 6 and like the same thing and can do the same things.  I love it people say I was crazy I say try it you may like it!!!!
ConelsMommy
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 3:27 PM
I don't think that is crazy.  Just take care of yourself and do everything your doc suggests to avoid any potential problems.  The healthier you are the better regardless of your age- good luck!!!!
onehappyfordmom
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 3:27 PM
I don't think you are crazy, if you think you can handle it then I say go for it if you and your husband want another one! You have to do whatever you feel is right for you, you can't just listen to what others have to say about it because it may leave you with regrets later!
berlgirl1224
by Gold Member on Jun. 20, 2007 at 3:27 PM
i am 23. i had my oldest when i was 20 and my youngest when i was 22. it's great to see them so close. the only hard part was the breastfeeding. i guess it wasnt really that hard. i just had to remind my oldest that mommy needs to feed brother, so you cant climb all over me. now they are 1 and almost 3. they fight all day, and steal toys from eachother and scream a lot. but thats all normal stuff.  they'll eventually learn to love eachother. my kids are at the age now where they can both sit with me on the couch, and be read to. and they sit and share snacks. it's cue. i dont think you're crazy at all. babies are wonderful no  matter how close together, or how old mom is. my cousin's gf is 37, he's 24. they have a 7 month old and she is 4 months preg right now. they decided to get preg quickly so she wouldnt be so high risk too, and they wanted their kids close together. the only hassle of having them close (now that they're as old as they are) is getting them to andd from places. like i have to put the little one in his carseat and keep talking to the oldest so he stays near me, then take him to his side of the car, and strap him in. then when we get to the store or wherever, i have to take the oldest out, walk him to the other side, and hold his hand or watchhim the whole time while getting the little one out. and then there's the little one in a cart, and the older one "holding" onto it. tyhankfully he has learned to actually hold the cart now, instead of running off.  and my neighbor has a 10 yr old, an 8 yr old, a 5 yr old, and now 8months preg. she seems to be fine doing it. i say if you really want another one, go for it. as long as you can do it financially. good luck.
Missy222
by on Jun. 20, 2007 at 3:29 PM
Hi. I am not in your position, but I had some thoughts. My dad and mom had 3 kids, then my dad and stepmom had 3 more. So there are 6 of us, and our ages are now 28, 26, 25 (me), 19, 12 and 10. It was great having so many siblings, and us older ones often helped out with the younger ones. It's fun being older with young siblings because we get to go through childhood things with them, and I'm sure they benefit having us older bros and sis' to learn from. So from my point of view, I say go for it!!! You'll adjust to two little ones just fine I'm sure, if you've made it to 3 already!!

~Missy
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