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Just a vent.....

Posted by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 7:18 PM
  • 2 Replies

Maybe I'm just emotional and depressed, but its really funny how you can be going on along your course of life and in one single moment everything is different. 4 weeks ago I worked for myself, my own, albeit small, but profitable business and today I am sitting at home in a neck brace unable to work. I'm pissed at myself. Usually, I could care less if hubby and I go out. I'm just happy to chill at the house because I work so hard.

But that night, I wanted to go to dinner. I just wanted us to do something nice and have a good time. And it was a good time. And then we went to go home and get my ID to meet some friends to play pool and we were hit by a drunk driver and I didnt make it home for another week!

I cant work, I dont know if I ever will be able to. I am in constant pain, and the painkillers and muscle relaxers barely help. Everyone is like "well you will get a settlement" and I know I will. The guy was totally in the wrong. But my medical bills are probably close to 20 thousand already and who knows how much more they will be over the course of my life. What do I do when it runs out and I still cant work? I'm scared. Im sick of being in pain. Im tired of sleeping with this barbaric contraption around my neck. I know I probably sound like a total whiner.... Its just weighing on me at the moment and I needed to cry.

I hate the car and the seat belt freaks me out now. My kids want to roughhouse, and I cant. My three year old wants me to pick him up, and I cant. It hurts to move and I feel like a head on a post.... or an ice cream cone... or something equally as strange.

I just want to take a shower and wash my neck!!! Can you believe I have to shower with this thing on?? GAWD just shoot me now.

OK I got a tissue. Im better now. kinda. pout. this too shall pass.......

God Bless You!

I am not skilled to understand
What God has willed, what God has planned

I only know at His right hand

Stands one who is my Savior


I take Him at His word and deed

Christ died to save me; this I read

And in my heart I find a need

Of Him to be my savior

-Aaron Shust "My Savior, my God"

by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 7:18 PM
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Replies (1-2):
snoopy21276
by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 7:39 PM

Wow, youhave so much going on.. i hope the venting helps release some of the anxiety! Here's hoping for a better year in 2009!

mommywife2b
by on Jan. 2, 2009 at 7:46 PM

its ok to cry. just let it out. pray and things will work out. and dont b mad at yourself, u didnt tell the drunk driver to hit u. it was his fault, not urs. and insted of picking up ur baby, can u sit down and let him climb on ur lap?? that would probably help. and i know just holding my baby makes me feel so much better no matter what the problem is, so try that.

U are in my prayers

feeding babygroombride
   Im a New Mom to MaliAleena
          and Wife to Victor

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