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Religious question kinda!! (No bashing Please!!)

Posted by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 7:43 PM
  • 10 Replies

I am in no way trying to bash anyone but am just curious. how do you deal with family and friends that have "found god" or are "born again Christians" when you dont think of yourself as one.

I have a cousin that has become REALLY religious and was talking w an old friend of mine last night that has as well. Talking to them now just makes me uneasy though because I am afraid I might offend them by things I might say or do. I mean I beleive in god and all but I do like to curse and listen to "un-Christian" music and stuff. I really dont consider myself very religious is what im trying to say. Is it ok to just be myself when I am around them? Am I expected to be on "good behavior" around them? If I dont bash their life styles, then why is it ok for them to quote scritpture and stuff to me when I dont like it?

Any advice?

  

by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 7:43 PM
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Replies (1-10):
briana_paige
by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 7:44 PM

I am a Christian and I say be yourself! You are who you are, you don't have to change yourself to please them. Just because they have changed doesnt mean you have to also

Ziggy.Stardust
by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 7:45 PM

My best friend is a Jehovah's Witness, as religious as you get, and I am an atheist. I am myself around her and she loves me for me. She is very open minded. Just be yourself, unless you say something outrageous i don't think they should get offended.

ErikaM27
by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 7:46 PM

my sis became like this but i respect her for it I tend to curse sometimes so i have to watch what i say but i don't change who i am because of her. If it bothers her then I won't talk to her about certain things so I know where I draw the line.

Profile Comments
michelleb1480
by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 7:46 PM

That is hard because "born agains" can be a little aggressive with their newly found wisdom.  I would state that you are not interested in listening to what they have to say and it makes you uncomfortabble.

MikeysMom51108
by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 7:48 PM

Yes, by all means, be yourself around them. They chose that lifestyle--not you. I chose to convert to Judaism--but I would never, ever expect my family to change their lifestyle just because I changed mine.

If they start quoting scriptures or "preaching"--just politely ask them not to. Say something like "Ya know, it's great that you have this relationship with God and want to share, but I'm not really interested in learning right now." I have an aunt that has recently turned to God (after years of being Atheist), and she is always preaching to everyone. I'm religious, but sometimes I just don't want to hear her holier-than-thou speeches, so that's what I say to her.


witchywomanav
by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 7:49 PM

My bio father was born again. He decided that since he wasn't married when I was concieved, I was a sin that he didn't want around. When he finnaly decided that he wanted to speak to me again, he tried to convert me. I don't believe the same things he does, and for him to come back into my life just to change me really bothered me. He won't have anything to do with me now, he would't even come to my wedding.

Quoting michelleb1480:

That is hard because "born agains" can be a little aggressive with their newly found wisdom.  I would state that you are not interested in listening to what they have to say and it makes you uncomfortabble.


WifeandMommy266
by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 7:49 PM

Just be yourself. And remember, Christians are perfect, they are just forgiven. I dont agree that born again Christians push their beliefs or anything else on others, because I am one and I do not do that. Im sure there are people out there that do that, but by far not the majority.

mooremom
by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 7:51 PM

Just tell them how you feel and continue to love them because they are family and I hope they will do the same.

SugarMama99200
by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 7:51 PM

Thanks so much for replying mamas. I do try to just be myself when im around them or talk w them but im just uneasy for some reason.

  

Lisa_729
by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 7:53 PM

I think that you should be yourself.  They got to know you as a friend and they accepted you as you are, or they wouldn't be your friends anymore.  Just because they are very religious that doesn't mean that you have to change who you are.

Now, the Scripture thing, I don't know.  Maybe try telling them the nicest way possible that while you respect their choice in religion and beliefs, you don't feel the same way, and ask them to please stop quoting Scripture to you. 

I am a Christian and I don't expect my non Christian friends to change who they are when they are around me.  I want them to be who they are.  I also don't quote Scripture to them unless they ask me a question about Scripture or my beliefs. 

I know from first hand experience how hard it is to have a Christian friend quote Scripture and question my life style because it doesn't match theirs.  I'm sorry that they are doing that do you.  I hope that you are able to find a way to fix the situation and keep their friendships.  And the best answer might just be letting it go in one ear and out the other, if other options aren't going to work.

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