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Calling all divorced moms in NJ - I seriously need your help

Posted by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 8:50 PM
  • 7 Replies

OK so some background info - my ex and I will be divorced for a year in Feb.  According to our divorce papers child support does not begin until our marital asset (our home) is sold.  Until then we are both required to pay 1/2 of the mortgage.  Well needless to say he stopped paying his 1/2 and I could not afford to pay 100% so I called the bank explained the situation and put the house on the market.  Got the bank to agree to a short sale, had a cash buyer and found out we could not go to closing as the ex has IRS liens against him from his business.  Since March of 2008 he has not paid one single penny of support for our 2 children.  Him and his new wife (they just had a baby in Dec) have done nothing but harrass me about the stupidest of things.  The hot topic this week is clothes for the girls that belong at his house because his wife bought them.  Sent him a bag of clothes and got 2 very nasty voice mails form her and one from him calling me everything you can imagine.  Now I know many of you are probably saying why are you taking all this crap from him.  Well I choose to not respond to either one of them when they get like this for a few reasons - 1. My girls as what happens between my ex and me ultimately affects them too.   2. I know I am a much better person than they are.  There is sooooooooo much more but I think this is enough info for the time being. 

My dilemma and what I need help with is this - to take my ex back to court to force the child support issue will cost me a minimum of $6000 with my current attorney.  I am in the horrible place called catch 22 - I can't afford to pay the attorney and I can't afford not to either.  Does anyone know of a good but low cost attorney in NJ??????  Can anyone help me fill out the papers to file the motion in court?  I know I don't need an attorney to do it but do not feel confident enough to do it on my own.  Is there anywhere I can go to get some sort of legal support????

Thank you for all your support and please no bashing - I come here for support - I get enough bashing from the ex and his wife.

 

by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 8:50 PM
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Replies (1-7):
possummom
by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 8:53 PM

wow...wish i could help ya...but here is bump for ya...personally i dont think it is rite at all that you dont get child support til the house sells. i think you should be getting it the whole time. make sure you get proof that he has not paid for the house and it was all left to you. good luck. i hope you get it settled soon!!

               


SweetAngel0401
by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 8:54 PM

im soo sorry you have to go thru this, i cant help but heres a bump

mommyof11050307
by Ruby Member on Jan. 21, 2009 at 8:56 PM

You should be able to go to legal aid and see if they can do anything for you. If not you maybe able to get your legal fees repaid since hes not following court order. Or you can go to court and file contempt of court charges against him. Im not sure about the lien on your house though. My parents got divorce in NJ thats how i know. Good luck.

miss_nevin
by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 9:01 PM

Just a question.. now how about dshs... they are the force i mean if he dont pay and there is an order already they just take it from the employeer.. and they will help you for real.. now im in washington but i went to court on my own and what a paon didnt get anywhere.. i went to DSHS.. and they got an letter in the mail after 3 weeks and then if he keeps not paying to take if they can or then they start taking his drivers lic and after a few years its jail time if he dont pay.. for real.. and they take it back to court with out you dealing with all the paperwork.. now they do take fees for this but it comes out of the support.. and its like 25$ a year

mcatarin
by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 9:09 PM

In NJ its done through probation and I went to them and was told until I have paperwork showing the house is sold or foreclosed on there is nothing they can do unless I file a motion to change the divorce.  They agree that the system stinks but their hands are tied.

mcatarin
by on Jan. 21, 2009 at 9:24 PM

bump

mommyof11050307
by Ruby Member on Jan. 21, 2009 at 10:50 PM

What do they say about him not paying his half of the mortgage??

uoting mcatarin:

In NJ its done through probation and I went to them and was told until I have paperwork showing the house is sold or foreclosed on there is nothing they can do unless I file a motion to change the divorce.  They agree that the system stinks but their hands are tied.


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