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How many

Posted by on Jan. 25, 2009 at 8:19 AM
  • 14 Replies

 

Poll

Question: Have you been either sexually abused or raped?

Options:

Yes

No


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 67

View Results

I read  a post earlier and alot of responses echoed my own experience..... I wanted to test a theory I'm not trying to bring up painful memories or cause any sadness.

If you answered yes do you feel that has affected your sex life... (ie more or less partners, age etc)?

Your honesty is amazing and these stories are......powerful

Thank you so much fo rdoing this

by on Jan. 25, 2009 at 8:19 AM
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Replies (1-10):
mitch576
by on Jan. 25, 2009 at 8:27 AM

molested by my paternal grandfather between the ages of 5-9

owner of 30andbeyond...jigsaw ribbon...ADMIN of autism, asperger's, pdd awareness
 
 


 




 




 




 

proud_mami_of_3
by on Jan. 25, 2009 at 8:27 AM

I lost my virginity (15) to rape and after being raped the 2nd time at 19 I stopped caring about "who" and in a odd way I think that is why my number is a bit high. I felt like I couldn't say no or that they wouldn't listen if I said it.  Anyway that is my story

Mrs.Jasso
by on Jan. 25, 2009 at 8:30 AM

Molested by my moms boyfriend

kscwrcsmom
by on Jan. 25, 2009 at 8:30 AM

I know the feeling. Why say no when they are just gunna take it if you do?

Quoting proud_mami_of_3:

I lost my virginity (15) to rape and after being raped the 2nd time at 19 I stopped caring about "who" and in a odd way I think that is why my number is a bit high. I felt like I couldn't say no or that they wouldn't listen if I said it.  Anyway that is my story


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One died for your soul and the other for your freedom.

2boysMoma
by on Jan. 25, 2009 at 8:37 AM

My Uncle did it.  It started when I was 6 and I finally told when I was 9.  I have only had one partner, my husband.  But he wants to be adventurous I guess you can say and I am not so adventurous.  I don't want it as much now as when we first got married, but I don't think its because of the rape, but rather because of the years we've been married and my age maybe.

I pray we can all find peace and solice in knowing the past is the past and the future is what we make it.

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Cakelover_5
by on Jan. 25, 2009 at 8:43 AM

I was raped and got pregnant. I had a son who is absolutely wonderful. It affected all aspects of my life. I was lucky. I met a man that loves me inspite of myself .. lol .. He has been there through a lot of crap that i had to deal with. Not many men would do what he did. I love him more than words can ever say.

Laylasmommy709
by on Jan. 25, 2009 at 8:49 AM

I think it affected my sex life big time...Some things i wont do or if my fiance tries them i freak out...When i was younger i slept with a lot of guys...and it was like it was nothin...Like i felt numb...So i think yes it does affect my sex life.

harvgal04
by on Jan. 25, 2009 at 8:49 AM

Yes I was raped in 2004. My friend was killed in a car accident, and i was already out of my moms house b/c we got into a fight. Well they came to where iw as staying and told me she died.  I went  back home that day, and went out with friends that night, I drank and got drunk (yes stupid) it was to get rid of the pain of yet another loved one dying (lost 2 already that year). Well i was with 2 so called friends when they had friends over, i went to the bathroom, and they followed, shut the door behind me (2 guys). THe one held me down, while the other raped me, and as i cried, yelled no, my friends did nothing, they said i was joking. I never told anyone, well not family, my SO knows.

At first i felt worthless, so when i got in a relationship i thought i was only good for that and didnt want them to force it on me, so i just gave in. ONce in awhile i'd break down cryin in the middle. ANd yes to this day it affects me a little with my sex life.

vbongard
by on Jan. 25, 2009 at 8:54 AM

I was 12 when my moms boyfriends best friends took me out fishing and molested me.  He was not interested in anything but "going down" on me which at that age I did not object after he showed me what it was.  Anyway, I do not think it affected my sex life, but I did loose my virginity less than a year later.

michellekp
by on Jan. 25, 2009 at 10:12 AM

I would have to say yes it affected my sex life.  It affected my relationships with the opposite sex in general.  i didn't really notice it until recently when my husband and I needed to work on our marriage and had to go to counseling to figure it all out.  All of a sudden why I did the things I did, matter to me enough to actually look at my life.

I'm not one to blame my experiences when my life is tough or why I have the flaws I do.  That's all on me.  But it did  shape my thoughts and believes and values in a way I didn't realize until now.

I was molested by 3 family members (at different times) by the age of 8 or 9.  don't remember the time frames.  I think being told my whole life by my mother  (who didn't know of any of this until I was older) that all "you have in life was family.  Its the most important thing in the world.  With out them you have nothing.  When all else in life goes wrong, and it will, you will always have family. If you cant trust your family, who can you trust"  those phrases echoed in my ears while I was being molested by an uncle, a grandfather, an aunts boyfriend while she was in the same room.  I guess I just naturally developed a belief that if that's what families do, then the outside world must be awful.  After being cheated on by my first boyfriend, it just became a reality to me, that I am just a sexual being.  I'm not valued for me.  i couldn't tell you what my strengths or accomplishments are.  That's not what I was.  I was made to be slept with.  so I jumped on board!

While it was all in my subconscious, I figured the only way to avoid getting hurt was to do the hurting first.  It was my protection mechanism.  I slept with whom ever I chose, when I choose. I felt like that made me powerful.  I could now decide who I slept with, how long, where, and then I self destructed the relationship before he could do it to me.  I didn't realize this is what i had been doing my entire life, until I met my husband and now I had something I didn't want to loose, but had no idea what I needed to do to stop my self from my usual actions.  I made some HUGE mistakes, and lucky for me my husband stuck around and we worked on this together.  its still not an easy road.  I feel like a kid learning the world all over again, only now with my eyes wide open....and scared shit-less.

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