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Very hurt (update)

Posted by on Feb. 5, 2009 at 1:42 AM
  • 32 Replies

I just need to vent.  I am sleeping in my son's room tonight because my husband is a jerk.  He has been a jerk for a while but he does this thing where he will be super nice for like two weeks to give me that little glimmer of hope that things are going to be all better then things go back down the shitter.  We went through a time where we were like roommates.  I slept on the couch and he did his thing and i did mine ( i am a sahm) so i took care of our son, did my school work, and the stuff around the house.  WE would talk over dinner and that was it.  Then we went to marriage councling and cried and came to terms to work things through.  Well now things are going back to the roomate stage.  He comes home from work and eats, plays xbox then goes to bed.  His job is not hard.  He works from 11am until 7pm giving the asvab test for the military, so he pretty much sits at a computer all day and surfs the web while keeping an eye on the kids to not cheat.  I am just so hurt.  I just want him to romance me even a little.  Hold my hand, kiss me DO SOMETHING!  I am at a loss of what to do.  I have tried talking to him and he shuts me out and stops talking and ignores me.  I don't know what else to do. 

 

Well he apparently read the letter I wrote him and he agrees that we need to talk and that if we can't change our ways then we will get a divorce.  That was a huge blow to me so I will keep you ladies updated. 




by on Feb. 5, 2009 at 1:42 AM
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Replies (1-10):
squidlife4me
by on Feb. 5, 2009 at 1:44 AM

girl... throw that xbox ou the dang window get yourself some pretty panties and go sex the hell outta your man..

 

if he dont come around after that kick his ass to the curb and find one that will!!

Mamie_85
by Ruby Member on Feb. 5, 2009 at 1:47 AM

Put your son to bed, put on your sexiest lengerie and grab his hand. Don't say anything, just lead him to the bedroom, and BLOW HIS MIND!! he'll take the hint i promise. and if he just goes right back to his xbox, maybe he's depressed, or bored, or i dunno....i'm trying to give him the benefit of the doubt, but if what i suggested doesn't work, you might just need to bring him to counseling again. or if talking to him doesnt work, try writing him a long letter telling you how it makes you feel.

knglenn22
by on Feb. 5, 2009 at 1:49 AM

I did that yesterday night and its like wham bam thanks a lot and he goes back to his own thing.  Its like roomates with benefits i swear!  I wrote him a letter tonight and stuck it to his xbox so he will see it

Quoting Mamie_85:

Put your son to bed, put on your sexiest lengerie and grab his hand. Don't say anything, just lead him to the bedroom, and BLOW HIS MIND!! he'll take the hint i promise. and if he just goes right back to his xbox, maybe he's depressed, or bored, or i dunno....i'm trying to give him the benefit of the doubt, but if what i suggested doesn't work, you might just need to bring him to counseling again. or if talking to him doesnt work, try writing him a long letter telling you how it makes you feel.





Mamie_85
by Ruby Member on Feb. 5, 2009 at 1:54 AM

I suppose you'll have to wait till after he reads the letter.

my DF suggests to start playing xbox with him...............not sure why..maybe if he sees you care about what he cares about, he'll start being more interested??????? okay, i have no idea where my DF was goin with that, but that was his suggestion.

Quoting knglenn22:

I did that yesterday night and its like wham bam thanks a lot and he goes back to his own thing.  Its like roomates with benefits i swear!  I wrote him a letter tonight and stuck it to his xbox so he will see it

Quoting Mamie_85:

Put your son to bed, put on your sexiest lengerie and grab his hand. Don't say anything, just lead him to the bedroom, and BLOW HIS MIND!! he'll take the hint i promise. and if he just goes right back to his xbox, maybe he's depressed, or bored, or i dunno....i'm trying to give him the benefit of the doubt, but if what i suggested doesn't work, you might just need to bring him to counseling again. or if talking to him doesnt work, try writing him a long letter telling you how it makes you feel.

 


knglenn22
by on Feb. 5, 2009 at 1:56 AM

I have done that too.  I played the whole Gears of War game through with him.  It sadly doesn't help though but thanks for trying.

Quoting Mamie_85:

I suppose you'll have to wait till after he reads the letter.

my DF suggests to start playing xbox with him...............not sure why..maybe if he sees you care about what he cares about, he'll start being more interested??????? okay, i have no idea where my DF was goin with that, but that was his suggestion.

Quoting knglenn22:

I did that yesterday night and its like wham bam thanks a lot and he goes back to his own thing.  Its like roomates with benefits i swear!  I wrote him a letter tonight and stuck it to his xbox so he will see it

Quoting Mamie_85:

Put your son to bed, put on your sexiest lengerie and grab his hand. Don't say anything, just lead him to the bedroom, and BLOW HIS MIND!! he'll take the hint i promise. and if he just goes right back to his xbox, maybe he's depressed, or bored, or i dunno....i'm trying to give him the benefit of the doubt, but if what i suggested doesn't work, you might just need to bring him to counseling again. or if talking to him doesnt work, try writing him a long letter telling you how it makes you feel.

 

 





Mamie_85
by Ruby Member on Feb. 5, 2009 at 1:58 AM

Oh wow, we are both out of ideas. At this point maybe you need to give him an ultimatium. It's either the damn game or you. That SHOULD work. I've had to do it before when my DF got physical when i tried turning off the computer when he was playing an online RPG. That was kinda the wake up call. I hope it doesnt get to that point, but there is a such thing as video game addiction. (or like an addiction i guess) i would go back to counseling and make sure you bring up the amount of time he spends playing games.

melissamcmillan
by on Feb. 5, 2009 at 2:00 AM
hello. Not downing the other replies, but why does a women have to throw herself on a man? Why cant it be the other way around. Why should you put all the effort in and probably not even get responce and if you do, he'll be nice because he wants to be intimate and then when its over it will go back to the same way. You have to have communication before sexual advances because your relationship is more than that,right?You will Have to sit him down somehow and tell him that you guys need to have a special day for just u and him and tell him that your lonely and dont like feeling that way. Cant he put of the web or the game for a while for ur sake, he has to respect ur feelings and if he dont then i would stop doing things for him...cooking cleaning sex and show him the cold shoulder to give him a taste of his own medicine. I hope everything works out and god bless
babygrlsmommy
by on Feb. 5, 2009 at 2:00 AM

This sounds exactly like my hubby.  We used to have the "spur of the moment sex", romance, and love, we have been "roommates" for close to 2 years now, only we sleep together (No sex involved).   Good luck, I hope things work out for you!
 

babygrlsmommy.gif picture by all4jt1

jaysmommy04
by on Feb. 5, 2009 at 2:01 AM

I dont know what to say. But I am right there with you. My DH has been doing nothing but come home and do his own thing. I am a SAHM also I don't get out at all. I have no one to talk to, and when he gets home I think OK give him time to do what ever and then maybe later on you can do something like sit and talk about events of the day or watch a movie together. But no. He is too busy on his F-ing computer to want to have anything to do with me. He will play with our son. But when I start to talk to him he just says I'm sorry but I need to get some work done on the computer. ( he likes to program) . I ended up crying tonight because I put on a basket ball game in hopes that maybe he would just want to watch it. Just so I was not sitting alone in the living room again but no. I just thought - I am so lonely and just cried. And he wonders why I am on CM so much. It just sucks.

magenta2325
by on Feb. 5, 2009 at 2:02 AM

Sex him up everynight until he comes back around. After the kids are in bed strut around in your panties and a t-shirt or tank top. Eventually it will work.

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