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Grandmothers raising their grandkids........don't be ashamed to give me some feedback.

Posted by on Mar. 28, 2007 at 10:38 AM
  • 40 Replies
Cry Hi my name is Finesse.  And I'm a mother of 2 children and I have custody of my oldest grand child.  Her mom is overseas on deployment and her dad don't even bother nor do he cares for the child .  My grand daughter's dad hasn't seen his child since December and lives in the same state and city.  I wish some plz explain 2 me why these kids are having babies and can't raise them and just drop them off on their parents 2 raise.  I feel 4 the child because she didn't ask 2 be here.  Will someone plz give me some feedback.
by on Mar. 28, 2007 at 10:38 AM
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Replies (1-10):
by on Mar. 28, 2007 at 11:11 AM
I applaud you for taking your grandchild!  It must be tough but your doing a great thing.  Keep truckin on!
by on Mar. 28, 2007 at 11:14 AM
god bless grandma/////////
by on Mar. 28, 2007 at 11:15 AM
you are doing a wonderful thing and i know it might be hard but remember that little girl needs you and loves you and it is sad that the father wont be in her life but in the end it is his lost
by on Mar. 28, 2007 at 11:19 AM
Thanks 4 the words of praise and encouragements.  It's a struggle but I know I got 2 do 4 this child because her mom is not around 2 do so.  God bless each of you who responded.
by on Mar. 28, 2007 at 11:24 AM
I commend all grandparents who will step in and take over for their grandkids whose parents either don't want to be in their lives or who are overseas.  I am not a grandparent but I have custody of my ex husbands sisters child, so he isn't even mine biologically.  When she had Silas she wasn't capable of taking care of him, I have had him off and on from the time he was born till he was 2 and from then till now I have had him full time.  She just recently passed away from cancer, he knows that she was his birth mom but I have and always will be his momma.  He is my pride and joy and I couldn't imagine my life withouth him in it.  He will be 12 in May and we are struggling with alot of issues so if any of you moms could help me out I sure would appreciat it.
by on Mar. 28, 2007 at 11:42 AM
I can't explain why women have children and don't raise them, but I can relate. My mother didn't really raise any  of her children. My older sister and I spent the majority of our childhood and teen years with our grandparents and my younger sister is being raised by her father. I can't get into my mother's head as to why she allowed my grandparents to raise my older sister and me, but I can say that in some cases, the grandparent is the better choice. Our grandparents raised us better than our mother ever could. We had different fathers and neither of our fathers was an option for raising us simply because of the fact that my sister's father was in and out of jail, and mine disappeared before I was born. Our grandparents were the best alternative, and I wouldn't trade them for anything.
by on Mar. 28, 2007 at 11:54 AM

You are not alone!  Seems I look around and see more and more grandparents raising their grandchildren.    Just enjoy the time you have with your grandbaby and know you are making such a difference in her life just by being there for her!  As for the dad, he is the real loser, look into her eyes and know what he is missing.... what a shame they don't all see how fast these babies grow up!  Hang in there.  Just remember... "It takes a village to raise a child"

by on Mar. 28, 2007 at 11:55 AM
I have raised my oldest grandson since birth, he is 7 years old now.  He was born drug affected and his parents were not capable of raising him.  The doctors have stated that he would not have lived if I hadn't stepped in and taken him.  We had Child Protective Services involved, and lawyers and the courts too.  It was a nightmare.

She has not been in his life for over 6 years now.  He knows he has a mother but that for whatever reason she is not around.  He calls me Mom because he hears all the other kids call me that, but he does know I am Grandma.

I commend anyone who takes on a grandchild.  It is harder raising a grand than it is raising your own children.  I am facing some of the same situations as I did with my kids, but it seems different. Probably because I am older and not as patient.  I have to work full time and therefore he doesn't have as much time with me as my children did.

Keep up the good work and just know your grandchild will remember that you were there and will cherish the memories.

by on Mar. 28, 2007 at 11:58 AM
I commend you very highly for what you're doing. My hsuband is a Marine we have a 5 month old daughter, but I could never imagine giving my child to someone else to raise, shes my life. But I'm glad there are women like you out there will step up and give that baby a care taker who loves her and will take good care of her. Its a shame about her father though, I'll never understand how someone can help make a life and then never want anything to do with it.
by on Oct. 10, 2007 at 11:26 AM
Hi  precious Grandmother.
I too am raising grandchildren.... my youngest son is 10, oldest is 33.... the babies that I have are 21 months and 7 months.... The baby was born drug addicted and I have been raising them both since she was a few days old.... They are from my middle child and his wife.... they can't seem to want to be clean or even find a home to live in, so they signed guardianship over to me....We are what puts the GRAND in Grandmother.... We are blessed to have the chance to raise these babies .... mine have other grandparents that don't want them and want their parents to put them up for adoption, which is out of the question! Her mother to be precise... her father already has her oldest who is 6 and has his hands full, so I had to step up, and I wouldn't have it any other way... at least your daughter is deployed and not just out there on the streets using drugs.... The father is the one who is losing out, it's definitely HIS LOSS... I know how HARD it can get, at first there were times when after I put the babies to bed I would just sit in the floor and cry because I THOUGHT I couldn'tDO IT, but I can and I did, and I am healthier because of it... I lost 50 lbsm the Dr asked me how... LOL... I just laughed and nooded at the toddler and said, "chasing babies" So, it's ok to be frustrated and ok to vent, you are awesome and precious for taking on the task!!
Blessings to you!!
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