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What am I suppose to do about my lazy 4 year old ?

Posted by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 10:02 AM
  • 4 Replies

Sometimes I cannot believe the things that come out of my 4 year old daughters mouth. She'll be sitting on the couch with the coffee table right in front of her but yet she yells for me to come all the way from my bedroom (or wherever I'm at) and asks me to hand her the drink that's literally 10 inches away from her. Of course , I make her get up & get it herself , but she obviously doesn't get the point because just 5 minutes ago she yells from the living room "Mom come throw away this garbage" , she's eating a banana & wants me to get up & throw away the peel. I tell her to throw it away herself...she did.

She also has this problem of telling me to "do it then" after she asks me to do something for her. Like making dinner or whatever.. I'll say I'm going to in a minute , she'll say "do it then". For some reason it makes my stomach boil.

Oh , I almost forgot. One day I was really sick. While I was hanging over the toilet puking she comes in asking for me to get her some cereal , I tell her to hang on because I'm sick & she obviously sees me puking. What does she say? "Well hurry up then". Grrrr.

What can I do about this behavior before it gets worse?

by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 10:02 AM
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by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 10:13 AM

wow. i wish i could help you out with that. my daughter sometimes says she wants me to get hert the bottle of water that is on the table, but she isnt that bad. good luck.

by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 10:26 AM

does anyone in the house act like that? To me, it seems to be a learned behavior. *not bashing, just stating my opinion*  Does she do other things independently with out help? Such as playing by herself or art or something?  I would suggest, since she is 4, to have her help you with something, such as drying dishes, or sweeping, and rewarding her for it.. encourage her to do things on her own, and hopefully she'll figure out not to ask mommy for everything.  

by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 10:30 AM

With the laziness part, you're doing the right thing.  Making her get whatever it is by herself.  She'll eventually catch on that even if she asks, you're not going to do it and she'll just start doing it without asking.  Right now it may be more of a habit by just asking and you telling her to get whatever it is for herself as if it were just a sub-conscience thing.

With the "do it then" or "hurry up" sayings.  She's probably doing that to feel somewhat like a little boss.  I think it might give her a sense of control.  You can either get onto her about it and tell her to quit saying it, which will be a constant uphill battle or let her say it and still do things in your own time and your own way.  If you let it slide, she will stop saying it.

I've been through both of these issues with my boys, one was one thing and the other was the other  It will pass.


by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 10:34 AM

My DD was doing this as well. I started to have her help me. She helps fold clothes and dries the dishes and puts the gel pack in the dishwasher and make the bed and a few other little things. I am giving her an allowance. I want her to learn not to boss but to be a helper. I have talks with her about being respectful and using nice words and how words can hurt others. Its not a poof and done thing. But it is a learning curve. I also compliment her for doing certain things on her own. KInd of catch her doing good things. And when she talks respectful then I tell her I appreciate it. And this seems to be working. Its not laziness either. They are just trying to figure out the pecking order in the house. Hey if I can make her run every time why not. Kids go through all kinds of stages just to see where the boundary lines are.

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