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My family drama. They suck.

Posted by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 10:12 AM
  • 9 Replies

This frustrates me to no end, and I really don't know what to do about it.

I have a son who is 2 1/2 and he is afraid of dogs. My brother has 2 boxers that are about 65 lbs a piece and my nephew's birthday is next month. I asked my brother if he could please put the dogs in their room for the duration of the party so my son wouldn't be so scared. My brother and his wife absolutely refuse to put the dogs away even though there are a few other kids that will be at the party that are also afraid because the dogs jump up on everyone. This also happened last year and my brother just put the people who didn't want to be near the dogs down in the basement and let the dogs have the run of the place upstairs where the cake, food, drinks, and games were. My husband says that we should just not go especially since I'm pregnant and he doesn't want the dogs to jump up on me or my son, but this will start a civil war in my family - with nobody on my side.

I understand that is is his house, his dogs - he can make whatever decision he wants, but I was just hoping that he could put his nephew's safety over his dog's happiness. Am I wrong to think this??

by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 10:12 AM
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Replies (1-9):
duke25fan
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 10:14 AM

I don't think your wrong at all. I think he should respect his nephew and the other children coming to the party enough to not have the dogs running loose. It's not like your asking for them to be put away for the weekend, just a few hours.

I am so sorry your having to deal with this. Good Luck!!

Brooke208
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 10:14 AM

No, you aren't wrong at all.  I wouldn't go.  My sister had a huge Golden Retriever and he jumps on me a lot.  I have a bad foot so I can't handle the jumping.  If I ask her to put him somewhere, she would do it in a heartbeat.  That's how family is supposed to act.

PeytonNBella
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 10:18 AM

I'd skip the party, if they get mad too bad. Your son is more important then the dogs and your brothers feelings. I'd tell him "we're not going to be able to make it, if the dogs are more important then us"


missyrooTX
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 10:18 AM

You're right.  He's wrong.  I wouldn't go.  He needs to understand the potential dangers involved in letting his dogs do what they will.  I wouldn't make a big deal of the whole issue with your brother.  Obviously, that would be a conversation that leads to nowhere.  Just bow out gracefully.  Good luck hon!

 

siobhan21
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 10:19 AM

My sister has a boxer...she's not terrrible but will still jump at times...now her sister-in-law has a boxer who is constantly jumping on people!!  They're hyper dogs, God love 'em ;)...bottom line is, they ALWAYS put the dogs up if they have new guests over...and your hubby is right about not wanting you to be in jeapordy being pregnant!!  Let them get pissed...but unless they put the dogs away, I wouldn't go...period.

angieizzi
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 10:22 AM

I don't think you're in the wrong at all. I just wouldn't go if I were you, whether it started drama or not. I think that as hosts of a party (esp. one where there would be lots of children) they should take into consideration that just b/c they love their dogs doesn't mean that everyone will.

What if you slept?
And what if in your sleep, you dreamed?
And what if in your dream, you went to heaven
and there plucked a strange and beautiful flower?
And what if, when you woke, you had the flower in your hand?
Ah! What then?
- Samuel Taylor Coleridge
cardington
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 10:22 AM

I  don't think your wrong. If someone came to my house and were scared of my dog I would put her up. I don't care for other peoples dogs either and would hope they do the same. I guess it's a question of who is more important the guest or your dog. In my opinion my company would come first.

jbhaleyrn
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 10:24 AM

I have tried bowing out gracefully from things at their house before, but I get completely bashed for it. My parents even jump down my throat and ask me "How can you not go to your only nephew's birthday party?" along with other assorted guilt trips. No one seems to understand or care that I'm just trying to keep my son safe! My friends that have dogs are more considerate than my own brother is! I've never even had to ask them to put their dogs in another room, they just do it. Especially when they see my son getting scared! It just really pisses me off.

ff-princess
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 12:29 PM

don't go to the party.  when your parents start jumping down your throat and asking how you can not go to your only nephew's birthday party, turn that question around and ask "how can (insert brother's name here) not care about the absolute terror that my child feels around his dogs, and how can he think his dog's feelings are more important than my child's emotional well-being?" 

you're doing what is best for your child.  now you need to be an adult and stand up to your parents and other relatives.

Quoting jbhaleyrn:

I have tried bowing out gracefully from things at their house before, but I get completely bashed for it. My parents even jump down my throat and ask me "How can you not go to your only nephew's birthday party?" along with other assorted guilt trips. No one seems to understand or care that I'm just trying to keep my son safe! My friends that have dogs are more considerate than my own brother is! I've never even had to ask them to put their dogs in another room, they just do it. Especially when they see my son getting scared! It just really pisses me off.


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