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I almost beat the tar out of my DH!!!!!!!

Posted by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:15 AM
  • 34 Replies

 seriously  I almost did..............

My DH went to work this morning like he usually does. Told me he was going to call his Doctor to see if he could get an appointment for this afternoon. (his ear is killing him). So I said....okay have a good day and G/L at the Docs. Call me when you are on your way. Okay he says....and off to work he goes.

So I am doing house work checking my emails basically running all over the house. Meaning I have the dish washer running (makes noise) the washing machine (makes noise) the dryer running (makes noise) and the TV on....(more noise)

I am in the computer room which is right by the driveway so I can hear when cars pull in. So I am not usually startled by surprise visitors.

I am alone in the house.

All of a sudden I hear a noise!!  (I think ) "damn cats always scaring the snot out me"!!

Well then I hear foot steps!! ....heavy footsteps.......Oh shit someone is in the house!!. Its morning, the weather is fine, so I know DS is still at school. Besides the schools automated phone system didn't call the house to say kids were getting out early.......


Shit Shit Shit....what do I do?????

Gotta think fast!!

Need a weapon for protection

quick look around computer room........nope nothing there that would work...........

walk into living room I hear more footsteps........damn ! shit !

look around living room ....what can I use....pillow? NO! kleenex box? oh hell no !!

think think think......

books ?? maybe in a pinch....but no.....magazines.......what read them to death?? I don't think so....

Lamps....maybe keep them in mind...

hurry

I still hear them.........

Oh good in the corner my swiffer mop handle....its long so the intruder can't get close to me...I can get in a few good hits

I hear him in the bathroom...........

damn so close

shit shit shit.................

I raise the mop handle up over my head....gulp !

Get a good tight grip on the handle........double gulp!!

sneak around the corner

Get ready to bring it down hard on the intruders head!!!

quietly, shhhh almost there.....

ready.......................

Aim........................

and....................................

 

 

"What the hell are you doing home !!" I said to DH . "I was just about to clobber you !!!"  "Why didn't you call the house first?"  "I thought you were going to get an afternoon appointment??" (I am firing questions at him one right after the other not giving him a chance to answer!) "I was scared out of my mind" 

He then looks at my mop handle and says....so were you going to beat me with that??.(chuckle chuckle) ...yes...yes I was!! (and I probably still should !!) 

MEN!!!

he then tells me he could only get a morning appointment. He forgot to call me...oops !!

Men !!

Had to stop home to go to the bathroom, couldn't make it to the Doc's office. Didn't think he would scare me....!!

Men!!!

Sometimes they just don't think!!!......

So that is how my morning started! I hope the day goes better

by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:15 AM
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Replies (1-10):
neighbor_girl1
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:17 AM

LMAO!!!! Thanks for that!

jaytee
by Platinum Member on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:18 AM

LMAO the way you wrote that was just funny!!! Sorry you got the snot scared out of you, men!

theskillfactor
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:18 AM

That is hilarious!

froggirl82
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:19 AM

LMAO...Too funny. My husband has done that to me before and you just do want to beat the snot out of them.

Ms.Mommy125
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:19 AM

rolling on flooryou should write a book, I would totally read it. lol 

mommy.gif proud mom image by dianacadena1423

pricelesslove24
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:20 AM

Thats too funny, after you realized that it was your DH. I would still be beating him right now though lol hope your day gets better

Mom to Kelvin (5)&Chelsea(15m) Wife to Lance(26).

  




Plus-size-mommy
by StarBaby on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:20 AM

I'm so sorry but I was cracking up reading this! This literally made me LOL!! My hubby has done the same thing to me, I was asleep one day and the puppy (stray that lives outside) came running into our bedroom, I wondered how he got into the house so I jumped up to figure it out and weh nI walked past the bathroom I saw a shadow and turned real fast to punch out and it was hubby!! gotta love em!! lmao!!!

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jillbailey26
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:20 AM

 laughing You're a good story teller....lol.  That was funny.

~Jill~



tes1proudmomma
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:20 AM

That would have scared me too!!!!

Go ahead and hit him a couple time with the mop to get your point across. :)

ajswenson
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:21 AM

Funny....my husband LOVES to scare me all the time and ugh how annoying....he got a lesson about it though recently when he purposely snuck up on our 3 yr old and our 3 yr old started freaking out crying he was scared so bad....maybe he won't think it's so funny any more!

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