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Does it keep you from disciplining your child in public?

Posted by on Mar. 8, 2009 at 11:11 PM
  • 111 Replies

Since I have become a mother, I have been so afraid someone was going to think I was doing something wrong. It seems like there is always someone crying abuse or telling someone else in public they're parenting their children the wrong way... And people will almost call CPS over anything.. granted some of the calls are needed, but what about the calls that are someone thinking abuse when there is none. I always feel the need to explain anything I'm afraid someone wouldn't approve of... A post on here made me so afraid someone would call CPS on me.. all because someone turned me saying I wouldn't feed my son pancakes into me starving him and putting him on a diet. It's really easy for things to get out of control.

So do you change the way you discipline your children in public, for fear someone won't approve? Or is that just me? For instance, I would NEVER spank my son in public. Just an example.. he isn't spanked.

*Edit*** I just wanted to say, alot of people seem to be suggesting that my discipline must be abusive if I'm afraid to do it in public. This is a crappy assumption on their part. My son is in no way abused, and as I said above, he isn't spanked.. and that is not the reason I think twice before I discipline in public.. This post was to see if the way things are these days effects the way you discipline your children. While spanking is ok to some of us, it's also not to alot of people.. And even people in these responses have stories of people mistaking their discipline for abuse. It seems really hard to discipline a child effectively in public when everything from spanking to yelling to timeouts are being considered abusive. Just to clarify, that was my point.. and No, I do not think my discipline is abusive.

MySpace Army Wife Graphics
by on Mar. 8, 2009 at 11:11 PM
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Replies (1-10):
IloveHayden08
by on Mar. 8, 2009 at 11:17 PM

My child just turned 1 so the only discipline he is old enough is a firm NO but when he gets older If I need to discipline him I will take him somewhere private like the bathroom or outside. I think if someone thinks that there form of discipline might get them turned in to cps then it may be to harsh.

Braylonsmommy19
by on Mar. 8, 2009 at 11:18 PM

no I don't change the way I discipline because the Bray will think he can get away with more I always make Bray ride in a cart but this on day at Kroger I let him walk well we were in line (I was with my mom) the store was super busy and Bray kpt walking away from me I kept tell him to come back and he would walk into the other line again I gave him warnings and said bub if you do it again you are going to get a spanking he said mommy look and walked away from me... so I smacked his butt (i barely smacked his bottom) he didn't even cry but he stopped anyway this man behind me said I should call children services and I turned around and like laughed a little I thought he was joking he was like no I should get everyone's name you just saw that and have your son taken away I was shocked I just turned around... the lady standing beside me looked at him and said no that's what is wrong with kid's today they don't have any discipline he was like well you don't have to hit your child blah blah I just got out of the store i didn't want involved in their convo because I was afraid he really would call even though I did nothing wrong!!!!

TessyCat
by on Mar. 8, 2009 at 11:19 PM

Nope, I really don't care what they think. At least I am discipling my child and teaching them that they can't act that way and get away with it. I have popped both of their butts in front of cops and sat them back down in the cart. I haven't ever gotten in trouble for it because I'm not beating them, I am lightly smacking their backside. Most people around here are actually grateful to see a child getting corrected instead of pacified or given their way. After I'd popped my oldest DD's butt the cop looked at her and asked if she was going to keep it up.

 

 

luv2wahm
by on Mar. 8, 2009 at 11:22 PM

my kids are pretty well behaved. All I have to do is do the counting 1....2....3 trick and they know I mean business...usually before I hit 3 they are doing what they are supposed to be doing.

starleigh21
by on Mar. 8, 2009 at 11:23 PM

 No, i wouldn't change how i parent/discipline. And, i've had cps called on me before, of course for ridiculous acusations. (there's a whole lot of history). I have 5 step-kids, so it's all come from bio-mom, who has numerous mental disorders.

I refuse to discipline/parent kids based on anyone else's thoughts or idea's. And, i wouldn't not discipline because someone's opinion of how i do things. I'm not perfect, I make mistakes, but that's how people learn. These kids are healthy, happy, and taken care of, they are not beat or mistreated.

I will raise these kids/my kids the best way i see fit, based on my own idea's and thoughts, not someone else's.

I've had them sit down in the store for not listening, I've pulled the van over and made them get out of the van and made them stand by the van until they were done fighting, I've taken their supper plates away before they were done due to fighting, playing, talking about innapropriate things at the table. Some may see those things as inappropriate, and i don't care.

It's our job to provide for them now so that they have the best chance at the best future possible. It is our job to teach them from right and wrong, what's acceptable and what's not. If the people in their lives who love them don't teach them what they need to learn, who will? The wrong person, or bubba in the local jail.

iluvpink0701
by on Mar. 8, 2009 at 11:24 PM

That is what I mean! Everyone is so quick to say you're abusing your children. I had my son in an IHOP when he was 6 weeks old, and there were 2 old ladies sitting in the booth in front of me, and they were talking about how horrible I was to have my son out and all the germs he could catch in a restaurant.. and omg. I am so nervous about being accused of abusing my son, I would never discipline him in public.

Quoting Braylonsmommy19:

no I don't change the way I discipline because the Bray will think he can get away with more I always make Bray ride in a cart but this on day at Kroger I let him walk well we were in line (I was with my mom) the store was super busy and Bray kpt walking away from me I kept tell him to come back and he would walk into the other line again I gave him warnings and said bub if you do it again you are going to get a spanking he said mommy look and walked away from me... so I smacked his butt (i barely smacked his bottom) he didn't even cry but he stopped anyway this man behind me said I should call children services and I turned around and like laughed a little I thought he was joking he was like no I should get everyone's name you just saw that and have your son taken away I was shocked I just turned around... the lady standing beside me looked at him and said no that's what is wrong with kid's today they don't have any discipline he was like well you don't have to hit your child blah blah I just got out of the store i didn't want involved in their convo because I was afraid he really would call even though I did nothing wrong!!!!


MySpace Army Wife Graphics
trish33990
by on Mar. 8, 2009 at 11:26 PM

i will give them a slap on the butt, hand, mouth, in public- depending on what they did. i could care  less about wat others think. they can call cps on me, i know im not doing anything wrong... if i didnt discipline my kids, then maybe i would expect someone to call on me.

vicki77433
by on Mar. 8, 2009 at 11:26 PM

I mostly do time outs or take things away from my kids.  I do not hesitate to do either in public.  My son has been made to sit down more than once in the grocery store for acting up.  It embarrassed him to death and we have had near perfect grocery store behavior for nearly a year.  He is four years old.  My daughter is six and I just have to threaten her with a time out in public and she straightens up.

If anyone feels the need to call CPS on me for that they can be my guest. 

ErikaM27
by on Mar. 8, 2009 at 11:27 PM

I will smack his hand if he's doing something he shouldn't like grabbing things from a store shelf or whatever. I understand what you mean though things are way different now.

Do you want to vent? Join my group!! WTF

Kris_PBG
by on Mar. 8, 2009 at 11:27 PM

No - but I don't do anything in my home that I wouldn't really do out of my home.  We do not spank (or hit, or pop) in my household - people don't call CPS for how we discipline! :)

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