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i feel like my child hates me.

Posted by on May. 8, 2009 at 9:38 PM
  • 9 Replies

Please someone tell me this is normal. My son acts like he hates me. He's 19 months old right now.. and today he didn't take a nap so obviously by the time bed time came he was REALLY tired. And as soon as I said "it's time for night night" he started screaming bloody murder. I had him in his room getting him ready for bed and he was acting like a demon child. I don't know how else to describe it. It was that bad. Screaming and stomping around. Everytime I walked near him he would freak out and run teh other way or start stomping more or kicking. he was acting like he was terrified of me or something. I wasn't losing my temper with him or anything I was very calm the whole time trying to be soothing, and holding him and talking to him in a calm voice but no matter what I did he just kept screaming and acting like i was torturing him or something. I swear i don't abuse him or anything!! I put him in his crib and I can't even describe it.. he was just running around in his crib and kept throwing himself into the sides of his crib, and screaming and there was nothing I could do about it. I kept offering him his blanket or a book or some tylenol because i think he's teething but he wouldn't take any of it so I was just standing there crying. and I just had to leave the room so i walked out and i heard my mom go in there and go shhhh (i live with my parents) and as soon as she went in there he stopped crying!!!!! she held him and he went right to sleep! I think my son hates me! Can somebody tell me that's normal in any way? that can't be normal. i'm his mommy.

I'm a young, single, supporter of extended rear-facing, extended breastfeeding and co sleeping, doesn't believe in spanking, still going to school and working part-time, still living with my parents, feeds my son healthy, doesn't allow soda, obsessed with the internet and car seat safety, thinks daycares are a horrible environment for young children and a lets my son watch TV even though he's under the age of 2 kind of mother.

by on May. 8, 2009 at 9:38 PM
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Replies (1-9):
by on May. 8, 2009 at 9:42 PM

 I feel the same way sometimes... I think it's probably b/c my son is with me all the time, so he just wants to see someone else or something like that I think..  That's the only way I know how to describe it.  It will get better!!  Every kid has a bad day.

Mom to Matthew Jr & Jacob Noah, Wife to Matthew Sr

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by on May. 8, 2009 at 9:43 PM

im not at that age yet dd is only 9 months.... But when and even now sometimes i get tense and my mom will take her and she will calm down for her not me... maybe he can sense that your tense?? btw my mom lives in oregon so its not often that she can just soothe her ... but sometimes kids just need someone else other than us....

by on May. 8, 2009 at 9:48 PM

My daughter is like that sometimes too. My dd is 15 months old and when I tell her I am going to put her to bed she runs for daddy becasue he didn't tell her he was putting her to bed. She does the same thing with him when he goes to put her to bed. He probably knows that if he goes with you he's going to bed and thinks that if he goes to someone else he won't. It's just a temper tantrum. He doesn't hate you.

by Silver Member on May. 8, 2009 at 9:49 PM

Sounds like he was overtired or just doing it to get the attention. If he acts like that again,I would just say "its night night time"put him in his crib,give him his blankie and whatnot,a kiss "night night,I love you" walk out the door.If he keeps screaming,just stand at his door and say"Its okay honey.night night" every few minutes or so. It might seem cold-hearted but I've had to do this a couple of times with my dd as she was approaching terrible 2's and she learned quickly that she wasn't going to run me ragged at bedtime.Good luck! 

in loveMe and Nate 6.12.99blowing bubblesGrace 10.10.03

by on May. 8, 2009 at 9:50 PM

your not the only one i think they are just trying to figure things out and some times they get over tired and over stimulated and just mean but thats part of them learning ! your a good mama

I am a SAHM , I am a loving devoted military wife ! . I have never co-slept , I formula feed ! I spank, use times outs .  I am teaching my child manners ! I will not alow my child to think she can be a picky eater .  I am opiniated , sarcastic! I am not afaid to defend my opinion  and will let you know it ! I swear! I dont feel like i have to play with my child every second of every day ! I am honest with my child ! I don't sugar coat things for her .  how ever i am completely in love with her! I love being my husbands wife its one of the best things i have ever been called! and my Daughter mother is is the other best thing i have ever been called!

ttc  toddler girl  american flag ribbonpink ribbon

by on May. 8, 2009 at 9:50 PM

when they hit that age they make it seem like they are out to get they plot thwarting your day.....i hear this phase is over when they turn 18

by on May. 8, 2009 at 9:52 PM

oh my momma you poor thing dont even feel that way! your son loves you most in the world- its true! I have a 20 month old son and Im 24 weeks preggy, and my son is my little buddy we do everything together and the other day he smacked in the face and screamed at me.  i felt sad and started crying, and then I remember how that morning he came and gave me a big bunch of kisses. they are little and sometmes confused and they can talk to express themselves so they can get very frustrated. and especialy since he didnt get a nap- e was exhausted.

so dont worry your baby will always love you and yo are totaly normal for worrying about that. unless we're both werdos lol !

by on May. 8, 2009 at 9:53 PM

I don't think he hates you! You said he didn't nap so he was probably just over tired and over stimulated. It happens to us all I'm sure. I think kids sometimes calm down better for anyone but the parents and that's just how it is. My DD treats me like chopped liver half the time when my SO is home but I don't take it to heart since he works so much she just wants to be around him when she can. Try not to get too frazzled over it - they can sense emotions which also may be why he didn't calm down. Keep your chin up, put your game face on and just know that he loves you.

by on May. 8, 2009 at 9:55 PM

Yeah I think it's normal.  My kids are 3 years and 16 months.  My 16 month old ditches me the second she see's daddy or grandma.  I just let it be.  They are stuck with me all the time so when daddy comes home, off they go and when we go to my mom's I am a nobody.  I used to get upset but then I realized,....oh this is a great time to disappear, lol.  I didn't really disappear but I can go to the restroom alone, I can take a shower now, I can eat.  All the things I couldn't do alone!  If your son wants to see Grandma and she is okay with it, take the opportunity now.  Now that my son is older, he got into the stage where only I was good enough.  He is getting out of it now but for 9-12 months, he would cry when I left.  So yeah enjoy it now because pretty soon he will be attatched to your hip!

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