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Child abandonment vs kidnapping...

Posted by on May. 24, 2009 at 1:34 PM
  • 12 Replies

If you were to leave your spouse/SO and took the child you had together with you could that be considered kidnapping? What if you plan to work out custody but when you intially leave you want your child with you? Or would it be considered abandonment if you left them with the intentions of working out custody?

Personally, if you left your dh/SO what would you do?



by on May. 24, 2009 at 1:34 PM
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Replies (1-10):
2007mommy2be
by on May. 24, 2009 at 1:37 PM

I would take my child with me no ifs ands or butts! I do not think u can go out of state, so that would be kidnapping, but if ur in the same state (area) and move out thats fine. U can file for emergency orders if is an emergency issue.

Luna091306
by on May. 24, 2009 at 1:39 PM

Not planning on going out of state or even town. I do plan on taking her though. What would be considered grounds for emergency orders?

Quoting 2007mommy2be:

I would take my child with me no ifs ands or butts! I do not think u can go out of state, so that would be kidnapping, but if ur in the same state (area) and move out thats fine. U can file for emergency orders if is an emergency issue.



MrsTabangcura
by on May. 24, 2009 at 1:58 PM

I don't think that is kidnapping. Either one of you could legally take the kids. I thing reason for an emergency order would be if you could prove your child is in danger or prove he is going to leave the country or something with him. If me and DH split up  I would let him take the kids but work out an agreement that he has to stay close to here.  

elleinad
by on May. 24, 2009 at 2:20 PM

Until custody orders are set in place, child usually goes with the mother or the person who's spent the most time providing primary care. If you do not provide information to the other parent as to your whereabouts, it's considered kidnapping.

"...Only the doing of justice is a good enough excuse to be born."

 

Luna091306
by on May. 24, 2009 at 2:23 PM

Okay awesome. Thank you. I plan on telling him where I am going.

Quoting elleinad:

Until custody orders are set in place, child usually goes with the mother or the person who's spent the most time providing primary care. If you do not provide information to the other parent as to your whereabouts, it's considered kidnapping.



rockinmama07
by on May. 24, 2009 at 2:25 PM

If there is no signed custody order from a judge it is not kidnapping.  Until there is a signed custody order, whether temporary or permanent, either parent can take the child wherever they want with or without the others permission.

"Raising kids is part joy and part guerilla warfare." - Ed Asner

aidensmom1117
by on May. 24, 2009 at 2:25 PM

This is all true! And as I have found out cuz I left with my child (and now he is suing me for custody, that in his own words he doesn't want, he just wanted our son so I would have to pay him child support)
ANywho.. it is a form of kidnapping, but as elleinad said as long as you are the primary care giver you will be good! and yes you must leave info on where you will be!

Quoting elleinad:

Until custody orders are set in place, child usually goes with the mother or the person who's spent the most time providing primary care. If you do not provide information to the other parent as to your whereabouts, it's considered kidnapping.


lvnmylif
by on May. 24, 2009 at 2:29 PM

It is not considered kidnapping until there is a court ordered custody agreement.  Until that time both the mother and father have equal rights to the child.  Abandonment would be if your SO moves a certain distance away and establishes a life there IE residence, work and has absolutley no contact with the child.  You should do your best to work things out as far as the child custody is concerned.  Mediation through the court can be set up by you and it may help the both of you to wade through the muddy waters.  If things start to go south hire an attorney.  You will also want to look very closely at the child support guidelines of your state.  If you two can agree upon a child support amount that would be great if you can't any judge is going to follow the state guidelines when setting child support.  The thing for any of the situations is to be reasonable.  Be open to compromise and always put your child's well being before any of your personal feelings about the other parent. 

Angelbluewingsz
by on May. 24, 2009 at 2:30 PM

if there are no court orders it is not considered kidnapping.. found that out the hard way....

Asuggs
by on May. 24, 2009 at 2:30 PM

 When my sister and her husband split her lawyer told her that as long as they were both on the birth certificate and the was no custody agreement that either one of the parents could take the kids and run or go where ever and there was nothing either one could do about it. Now if you dont let him see her then he can come back and say that you are trying to keep him from her and it might make it harder to get main custody. But i do know that if you leave her there he can say that you abandoned her and it looks really bad on your part. Its a ruff one and it really is up to how big of a jerk he wants to be about it on how the out come will look.

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