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It shouldn't bother me but it does....

Posted by on May. 24, 2009 at 1:42 PM
  • 2 Replies

 

Backstory - My Dh (he is the oldest) has

2 blood brothers- Steven (19) Jared (15)

1 blood sister, Savannah (17)

1 stepsister, Kimber (13)

2 half sisters, Alyssa (11) Alayna (9)

and 2 half brothers. David (7) Aiden (4)

that's 8 yes 8 siblings.

The oldest four belong to Angela (aka satan) and Dan.

The youngest 5 belong to Angela (aka satan) and Brad. (just so everyone knows who i am talking about)

So Angela and Dan had been divorced since Jared was almost 2. Which is 13 yrs. She married Brad a year after her divorce. The oldest four grew up calling dan- dad and brad - brad. Normal right?

Well, then Dan died in 06 in a freak car accident. It was heartbreaking, He died a week after my dh and i announced our engagement. he never saw us married, never saw our kids, wont see his daughter get married. nothing. It was very hard for everyone.

But about a year after that.... Angela started making the kids call Brad - Dad. . . . My dh refuses to do that. The rest of them do it. And it bothers me SO badly. just oh so badly. My DH has a hard time not to flinch everytime Jared or Savannah goes "wellmy Dad did this" or "Our Dad is going to take us here".... I mean i can understand but thenit just seems so disrespectful...or maybe that isn't the right word... i can't think of the word, but it just doesn't seem right ya know? Sorry this was so long but i had to get it out....

toddler boystorkamerican flag ribbonair force

by on May. 24, 2009 at 1:42 PM
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Replies (1-2):
ajswenson
by on May. 24, 2009 at 1:48 PM

Ok so if I'm understanding this right, your DH's blood siblings are now 19, 17, and 15 in age.  This man that they are now calling "dad" has been their step dad since the before the youngest started school.....if that's the case, then I don't see it odd that they want to call him dad.  It may help feel the void left by their dad dying.  I think it was actually very respectful of them to NOT call him Dad until AFTER their birth dad died.  My sister calls our step-dad "Dad" and there is no way I ever would.  To each his own.  I can understand your husbands feeling, but I can also see the siblings.  He was what, about 10 when his mom re-married?  Old enough to not want another dad figure in his life.  Does that help see it in a different light? 

MamaDiedrich
by on May. 24, 2009 at 1:58 PM


Quoting ajswenson:

Ok so if I'm understanding this right, your DH's blood siblings are now 19, 17, and 15 in age.  This man that they are now calling "dad" has been their step dad since the before the youngest started school.....if that's the case, then I don't see it odd that they want to call him dad.  It may help feel the void left by their dad dying.  I think it was actually very respectful of them to NOT call him Dad until AFTER their birth dad died.  My sister calls our step-dad "Dad" and there is no way I ever would.  To each his own.  I can understand your husbands feeling, but I can also see the siblings.  He was what, about 10 when his mom re-married?  Old enough to not want another dad figure in his life.  Does that help see it in a different light? 

I have thought of it like that.... But... it still seems disrespectful to Dan's memory, ya know?

toddler boystorkamerican flag ribbonair force

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