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Advice PLEASE

Posted by on Jun. 9, 2009 at 12:28 AM
  • 3 Replies

I need some advice on how to make bringing home a new baby easier on my son!! He is 11 months now will be 16 months when the new baby is born. I know he will be upset and jealous at first and I will try my hardest to make sure he is still getting plenty of attention and one on one time with Mommy and Daddy. He is a mommys boy and has a hard time seperating from me now for any period of time...I am a SAHM so I am not sure how he will feel when someone new needs my time and attention also. We have made a plan that he will stay with Grandma for the days and nights we will be in the hospital except for the last night he will go home with Daddy and get back into his routine and my mom will stay with me and the new baby at the hospital. Any other advice or suggestions???

by on Jun. 9, 2009 at 12:28 AM
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Replies (1-3):
ZachNHannahsMom
by on Jun. 9, 2009 at 12:37 AM

 Take him and buy him a baby doll and acessories. Let him pick one out, you can even get him a boy! Start NOW showing him how to hold, feed, rock and be gentle with the "baby". Make the doll part of his daily routine as much as possible so that he can get used to taking care of a "baby", him seeing mom with a baby and realizing it's always there and not going away. As the time goes on, make sure he knows this is HIS baby and soon Mommy will have her own. Just keep reiterating how much special time a baby needs and soon you'll get to spend time with your baby, just like he is with his. If you can, call a local nursery and see if they will allow the two of you to visit to introduce him to infants and let him see you holding another to see it is ok. Chances are, at 16 mths he's not going to get it and that is expected at such a young age. It may be hard as hell or it may go smoothly...but you have to remember that even though you have a newborn...he is STILL a baby and still going to have a hard time. Plan now for dad to take over newborn duty for at least 1 hr or more a day and you spend one on one time with your son.

corbenleesmama
by on Jun. 9, 2009 at 12:45 AM

Thanks so much for your advice!!!! Bump for more!!

khmommy04
by on Jun. 9, 2009 at 12:48 AM

I am expecting my 3rd right now.

When my second was born we spent many months reading about being a big sister and talking about what babies are like, we played dolls and pretend to get ready. We also made arrangements to have her taken care of while we were in the hospital. It was very hard on her because we hyped it up and then she didn't get to be there. She wasn't at the hosptial much and it hurt her. She felt even more left out than she would have if we had done things differently.

This time we are doing it way different. We are having a home birth and both the kids will be home during early labor and then spend sometime shopping with grandma for a birthday gift for the new baby, when they come home we will spend all of the recovery time as a family of 5 instead of having them off somewhere else in addition to reading, playing and preparing for the baby.

I think this will be much more effective for our family. Obviously it is a family decision that only you can make. As far as the months that followed, it will get easier, but I would plan on having a basket of books next to where you plan to feed the baby and either a love seat or special chair for your toddler to sit. While you feed the baby you can read to your other child, also it wouldn't be a bad idea to keep a cd player with songs you two can softly sing to the baby while the baby is eating.

I always let my kids help with the things they ask to help with, but never ask them to help with the baby. You don't want it to feel like an obligation, but more like something new and fun. Letting them help with bath time is good bonding for the kids too. I let my older one pour the water over the baby's belly and legs and both get a kick out of it! We also got a toilet paper roll and had our dd decorate it. Then we told her that any toys or objects that fit inside were not safe for the baby. She went around the house inspecting EVERYthing for months! It was a great help and she had a blast!

in lovetwin girlspregnant bellywelcome spring.gif

Loving wife and mother to 2 wonderful girls, with a little one on the way!


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