If you're a SAHM....

Replies:

• 
• by
  • 4mom247
  on Jul. 3, 2009 at 3:54 PM

•  He cashes his check and hands it to me. I handle the bills and shopping for the family so it only makes sense that its in my purse.He gets money for lunch and things like that,when he needs money he doesnt ask,but he knows to tell me.lol I have issues (due to my ex husband) when it comes to thinking I have a certain amount of money in my purse & then get somewhere & find out I dont have the amount that I thought I had. Put it this way,I wouldnt get money out of his wallet without letting him know and I expect the same.

  

• 
• by
  • 2boymama
  on Jul. 3, 2009 at 4:04 PM

•  I wouldnt say I ask him for money..but we have a preset budget that we've made out and we both kind of consult with one another if we're going to be spending anything that goes against it...just so we know where we stand financially and dont run into overdraft fees or anything

   

   

   

   

   

   

• 
• by
  • isra1986
  on Jul. 3, 2009 at 4:06 PM

• He normally offers it. I ask him when ever a bill is due, but he asks me every day if I need any money before he leaves for work!

  

• 
• by
  • ferretlovingmom
  on Jul. 3, 2009 at 4:37 PM

• I said yes, but feel I need to qualify it. I do not agree it is his money, but we have no joint accounts and he refuses to set up a household account because he likes to see what I spend money on and how much. He even keeps a seperate credit card for just me and reviews it each month, questioning me on things he finds unnecessary. I am not allowed to see his credit card statement. He is not even hard up for money, saving at least $1K per month after all bills are paid.  I even have to ask for money for food shopping each week and used to be expected to give him the change, yes even if it was a few dollars. That stopped when I found out he was having a relationship with another woman, I don't know if it was physical but it was emotional.

  He will not pay for daycare for my son (MY son because hubby also spends little  to no time or effort with ds and ds is biologically his) as it is a waste of money when I am 'just' in school. I am a full time grad student (almost done, yeah) and have substitute taught through most of my son's life. My school is paid for thru loans that my dad has cosigned for me. Hubby thinks higher education is a waste of time and money.

  He gave no hint he would be like this before we got married or before ds was born. As soon as I was a SAHM though and without a full-time income, the true him came out. I am impatiently waiting for the day when I can tell him to take his money and shove it.

  Whoa...that was venom filled...thanks for the vent.
  

  
  

   
  

• 
• by
  • Audreys_Mommmy
  on Jul. 3, 2009 at 4:39 PM

• Quoting WendyJR:
  
  

  We use our credit cards mostly (pay them off every month), and he gives me cash to have on hand (only because he's the one that goes to the bank).  But no i usually don't *ask permission* to spend money when i go out shopping.  Now big purchases we discuss it before we buy anything, but if i want a shirt or a pair of pants or a coffee from Starbucks i just get it.  I'm an adult and he's not my father he's my husband.

  
  
  
  We do this also except he doesnt give me cash if i need cash i go to am ATM because he is always outta town.

  Wife to AaronMommy to Audrey Kate 5-23-06
  
  

  
  
  

  
  Make a pregnancy ticker

  
  
  

  
  
  
  

  
  
  

   

  
  
  

  
  
  
  

  
  
  

     

• 
• by
  • WhiteRose071406
  on Jul. 3, 2009 at 4:40 PM

• same here
  

  Quoting VanessaV:
  
  

  In our house I manage all the finances.  So if anyone is "asking" for money, it's him asking me.

  
  

• 
• by
  • hfs1998
  on Jul. 3, 2009 at 4:41 PM

• 
  

  Quoting VanessaV:
  
  

  In our house I manage all the finances.  So if anyone is "asking" for money, it's him asking me.

  
  ditto here.  I took over the finances a few years ago and we haven't looked back.  He loves it, thinks I am doing him a huge favor.  I think I am better at it.

• 
• by
  • hfs1998
  on Jul. 3, 2009 at 4:43 PM

• wow ...
  

  Quoting ferretlovingmom:
  
  

  I said yes, but feel I need to qualify it. I do not agree it is his money, but we have no joint accounts and he refuses to set up a household account because he likes to see what I spend money on and how much. He even keeps a seperate credit card for just me and reviews it each month, questioning me on things he finds unnecessary. I am not allowed to see his credit card statement. He is not even hard up for money, saving at least $1K per month after all bills are paid.  I even have to ask for money for food shopping each week and used to be expected to give him the change, yes even if it was a few dollars. That stopped when I found out he was having a relationship with another woman, I don't know if it was physical but it was emotional.

  He will not pay for daycare for my son (MY son because hubby also spends little  to no time or effort with ds and ds is biologically his) as it is a waste of money when I am 'just' in school. I am a full time grad student (almost done, yeah) and have substitute taught through most of my son's life. My school is paid for thru loans that my dad has cosigned for me. Hubby thinks higher education is a waste of time and money.

  He gave no hint he would be like this before we got married or before ds was born. As soon as I was a SAHM though and without a full-time income, the true him came out. I am impatiently waiting for the day when I can tell him to take his money and shove it.

  Whoa...that was venom filled...thanks for the vent.

   

   

  
  

• 
• by
  • kno4eva
  on Jul. 3, 2009 at 4:44 PM

• thats a hard question to answer lol. I ask hubby every now and then but if i ask for the debit card i dont ask him how much i can spend or what i can get. I ask him if he minds if i take out 20 dollars here or there. Just so i have something on me. We both manage the money tho... If I need something and WE have the money then I go out and get what ever it is that i need....
  

  
  
  

  
  

• 
• by
  • serioussifL
  on Jul. 3, 2009 at 5:00 PM

•  I do. Even though he always says yes, I still ask him if its ok that I go buy a shirt, or go get an outfit for DD.

  I am a breastfeeding, pro-choice, vaccinating, Turbo Jamming,
  disposable diaper using, cio sometimes, cat loving, dieting, married
  and love my husband Army wife and mom.

Only group members can reply to this post.

Join Group