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My aunt offended me so bad today..in front of a bunch of family members!
posted to Newcomers Club - Active discussion
in The CafeMom Newcomers Club
on Jul. 4, 2009 at 7:03 PM
- 27 Replies
- 660 Total Views
So my df and I are not married yet. We have 2 boys and we had them out of wedlock. My dad's side of the family is religious (most of them anyway) and that's all great and dandy..I believe in God too. But some of them think they are perfect. My aunt is one of them. She's my aunt by marriage. Anyway so her, myself, my df, my brother, my SIL and my sister's bf were all talking and a few other cousins and people were sitting around in the same area. My aunt said "So when are we gonna have some girls around here..everyone's having boys" and then she said to me and my sister's bf "But no more kids for you guys because you aren't married yet. No more of this unmarried and having kids crap! But Doug and Nina..its okay if you guys do because you're married now" And she said it right in front of everyone that was around us!!! My df turned his back and started looking out the window to the front yard because he was so pissed, my sister's bf and I looked at each other in shock and my brother and SIL just sat there. After my aunt walked away, my SIL said she couldn't believe my aunt said that. My sister and her bf also have a son out of wedlock, but you know what? We're both in long term, committed relationships. I just can't believe she had the nerve to say that, and say it in front of all the people who were around as well. I just wanted to smack her! She ruined the rest of my time there. I just wanted to leave the whole rest of the time :(
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Replies:
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- by on Jul. 4, 2009 at 7:06 PM
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Well here's the thing - being married won't magically make you better parents - so her throught process is biased based on her religion. If what you have is working for you - then just let it roll off your back. Everyone has opinions and while some of us rudely blurt them out - we don't have to listen to them :)
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- by on Jul. 4, 2009 at 7:10 PM
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my husband has a VERY religious aunt that i've been warned about by MIL, SIL, BIL, pretty much everyone here. they say she can be blunt and rude & if she ever says anything out of line to me feel free to say something blunt and out of line right back. she hasnt done this yet, but ive only met her one time. i am waiting though lol my baby shower is coming up and i know she wont hold her tongue. but that is my only advice. tell her, politely of course, to stfu. BEING A JUDGMENTAL BITCH is not a christian thing to do. someone should remind these ladies of that.
21 and on my 2nd marriage. not ashamed. SAHW, i cook i clean i keep my man happy. soon to be SAHM as well. first baby is due AUG 20. first wedding anniversary SEPT 14. support divorce when its needed. dont cheat, dont lie, dont disrespect. very opinionated but at the same time very open minded. married couples argue. its normal. dont love obama. dont hate obama. support the war (mostly the men and women fighting it). i live my life. your opinion/judgment/approval isnt needed.
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- by on Jul. 4, 2009 at 7:17 PM
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Well that wasn't very "religious" of her to say. I would have told her to stick it where the sun don't shine.
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- by on Jul. 4, 2009 at 7:47 PM
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Marriage is a wonderful thing, but marriage may not work for everyone. If You and you partner provide a safe and loving enviornment for your children and their happy, then that is what i important.
Our society is riddled with chilren who come homes of dysfunction and unfotunately, sometimes they become adults with major issues.
Your aunt and other serious religious people forget the commandment which states the we should not judge others. Each of us will be held accountable for the things we do, therefore we should not judge.
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- by on Jul. 4, 2009 at 7:49 PM
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You were WAY nicer than I would have been. I would have told her exactly what I thought about her opinion and where she could shove it--
A "true christian" would not pass judgment on others-
CHILD OF THE 70'S ~CLASS OF 1986~
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- by on Jul. 4, 2009 at 7:52 PM
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That was very rude of her to say. I would be pissed off as well. Is there a reason you guys don't want to get married?
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- by on Jul. 4, 2009 at 7:56 PM
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She may not like that you guys aren't married but she didn't have to say that.
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- by on Jul. 4, 2009 at 8:01 PM
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I don't mean to be rude or to sound like I'm not on your side. But I don't think it should have bothered you. It's your life, your business. She can't stop you from having kids. You should have just ignored her and enjoyed yourself... or you should have just told her right then and there to stay out of your business. If it were me I wouldn't be much nicer to her anymore....
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- by on Jul. 4, 2009 at 8:09 PM
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SHE NEVER SAID SHE DIDNT WANT TO GET MARRIED SHE JUST SAID THEY ARENT MARRIED YET
Quoting LA8YBUG:
That was very rude of her to say. I would be pissed off as well. Is there a reason you guys don't want to get married?
sorry about the caps i was tooo lazy to turn it off lol
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