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Do you tell your child 'no' so they become aware that they cannot have everything whenever they want it?

Posted by on Jul. 28, 2009 at 2:25 AM
  • 43 Replies

I don't know what the best age to start is, but since he could reach his hand out for something I have always explained that he cannot have everything he wants, just because he wants it.  There are things that he needs, and things that he earns with good behavior, but life can be unfair and that's just the way it is. 

I told my son this the other day in the store and a woman looked at me like I was crazy - my son is 3, btw.  Then I've had older women tell me it's good that I teach him this?

I think I'm teaching him a good lesson and am curious if anyone else does this?  What do you think?

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by on Jul. 28, 2009 at 2:25 AM
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Replies (1-10):
CarterMommy
by on Jul. 28, 2009 at 2:28 AM

my boys know the word "NO" very well, they hear it on a daily basis. well... not my newborn lol except maybe when he pee's when i take his diaper off and i yell "NO! Wyatt!!! Gross!!!" lol 

Lilypie

Lilypie

Lilypie
101InfantryWife
by on Jul. 28, 2009 at 2:29 AM

Im not sure how to answer this.. I do tell my boys No to things that they want or ask for for different reasons.. But I cant say that my sole intention is to "teach them a lesson about life being unfair".

I think i understand where you are trying to go with this... to teach that things are not handed to you in life, you have to work to get them.. But I really dont think a 3 yr old will grasp that for many many years.

Maybe just saying "we can't always get what we want when we want it" will suffice, and then brainstorm ways to "earn" it or whatever.

pregnancy calendar


CandaceD4u
by on Jul. 28, 2009 at 2:30 AM

I dont practice it yet. seeing as how im still pregnant. But definitely plan on instilling that in her mind from an early age! Im there to provide her needs. I want her to Work for everything she wants (age appropriately of course)  to gain independence! So she never feels like things were handed to her and she doesnt have to work for things in life.


Im currently Living with a girl like that..... LAST THING I WANT MY DAUGHTER TO TURN OUT LIKE!

Ava and I wait till you come home safe to us.

4 more months



MikeysMom51108
by on Jul. 28, 2009 at 2:31 AM

My son is only 14 months, and I tell him "no". He understands what "no" means, and he knows when he's doing something he's not supposed to be doing. I see nothing wrong with it. He needs to learn that some things are not toys, and that he is not allowed to do certain things.

sharisse
by on Jul. 28, 2009 at 2:32 AM

good

elly25
by on Jul. 28, 2009 at 2:33 AM

i have thought both of my children at a young age that they cannot have everything that they want and that no means no.I think that it's important to teach them that.That way if you tell them no,something will hurt them,and they get hurt.Then they will have been worned and will understand why mom told them no,that that'll hurt them.Sorry if this is ever where.I've had long day.

A neighbor of mine didn't introduce the comcept of no to her oldest child until he was three.Then wondered why he didn't listen to her when she told him no or to stop doing that it'll hurt you.He didn't understand what it meant. 

101InfantryWife
by on Jul. 28, 2009 at 2:34 AM

Im not sure she means saying NO for like danger or correction... I think she meant is when a child is asking for a want.. not a need... or not when he is doing something wrong..

Correct me if I misunderstood....

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crzy4luvfrmu18
by on Jul. 28, 2009 at 2:35 AM

 I tell my son no all the time for things he wants.  But at the same time, he loves to help around the house, so I reward him for that.  He is 2, but he likes to sweep (no he doesn't get everything up, but still), vacuum, and things like that, so I reward him kind of like an allowance, sometimes he gets money, or if we are at the store and he wants something like a new hot wheel or something I get it.  But he doesn't get "big" things that he wants becuase we save those for Christmas and his birthday.   He knows he gets things for doing things around the house to "help mommy" but that he isn't always going to get something every time we go to the store.  I guess I didn't really answer the question huh???

  

cheyeone
by on Jul. 28, 2009 at 2:35 AM


Quoting HeatherMae55:

I don't know what the best age to start is, but since he could reach his hand out for something I have always explained that he cannot have everything he wants, just because he wants it.  There are things that he needs, and things that he earns with good behavior, but life can be unfair and that's just the way it is. I tell my kids this all the time. Basically say life isn't fair so suck it up buttercup, when they tell me something isn't fair.

I told my son this the other day in the store and a woman looked at me like I was crazy - my son is 3, btw.  Then I've had older women tell me it's good that I teach him this?

I think I'm teaching him a good lesson and am curious if anyone else does this?  What do you think? You are doing a great job!!! keep up the good work.

My kids hear NO on a daily basis. it doesn't hurt them any.



Most days I'm Mom the rest of them I'm just plain nuts!!!

My girls Angel 13, Bella 6, and Dani (6/25/09)

101InfantryWife
by on Jul. 28, 2009 at 2:35 AM

Like so they dont grow up with a false sense of entitlement

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