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You would have to be a meth addict selling your babies for drugs...

Posted by on Aug. 12, 2009 at 1:12 AM
  • 29 Replies

To lose custody to their father in my state.

Anyone else live in a state where a mother is automatically the custodial parent with the father getting visitation, unless she is completely UNFIT...

Do you think it is fair?

 

by on Aug. 12, 2009 at 1:12 AM
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Replies (1-10):
singlemama20
by on Aug. 12, 2009 at 1:14 AM

I do and yes I think it's fair... I side with the mother 9 times out of 10... children seem to do better because a mother tends to be more involved than a father... just my observation

SnoBuny
by Platinum Member on Aug. 12, 2009 at 1:15 AM

No it is not fair! I firmly believe that men do not have enough rights to their children from before they are born even!

Men are often at the mercy of the mother! It is scary really!

AMarineLovesMe
by on Aug. 12, 2009 at 1:17 AM

I agree!

Quoting SnoBuny:

No it is not fair! I firmly believe that men do not have enough rights to their children from before they are born even!

Men are often at the mercy of the mother! It is scary really!



Lori_G4
by on Aug. 12, 2009 at 1:17 AM

Nope I do not think that is fair, as I stated in one of my replies in the child support post. My state is the same way. The mother automatically gets the children, unless she is proven unfit (which takes a lot) or unless she doesn't show up for court.

My father got custody of me and my two older sisters when we were little because my mom did not show up for court. That says a lot about the type of mother she was. The sad thing is, if she HAD shown up, the court would have awarded HER custody. Scary.




 Chris & Lori             Valerie-10             Brian-8                  Dalton-5           Maya-Jan 3, '08




 




 




 




I home school because I have seen the village, and I don't want it educating my children!

luv2wahm
by on Aug. 12, 2009 at 1:19 AM

oh yes...here in Idaho.

When my husband was married to his ex...on her daughter's first birthday, instead of being home she was out sleeping with another guy! He waited at home with family and friends, he called her work and found out she had left work early 3 hours prior.

At court, even her grandparents wrote a note to a judge stating that the kids would be better off with my husband.

During mediation..now mind you, mediators can not disclose to a judge what was discussed..his ex said that she wanted my husband to have the kids 50% of the time...3-4 days a week with him. When the mediator said that would either eliminate child support or greatly reduce child support, she got up from the table and said, that will never work for me.

During court my husband had the guy she was sleeping with on their daughter's birthday, come into court and testify that he had been sleeping with her for about 6 months..

Guess what..the judge awarded custody to the mother..why? Because the children were in their "tender years"..they were 1 and 3...

family in the van

Who I am as a mom can not be expressed in a paragraph. It is expressed by who my children will become.

jonesyj08
by on Aug. 12, 2009 at 1:19 AM

I don't know where I stand on this. In our state, usually the mothers get custody unless they sell/use drugs. Otherwise, the father's out of the loop. Although children need that father figure, I do believe that children do tend to do better with their mothers because they have that bond from the time they are concieved until the time in which they decide they hate their mother (it does happen). What I don't agree with is when a mother gets full custody and the children think that their father has abandoned them, which isn't always the case. JMO.

misssy2000
by Ruby Member on Aug. 12, 2009 at 1:20 AM

No its not fair. some men are better parents and more involved than mothers. I mean the lady that ate her baby I am pretty sure that the baby would have been much better off with the father or even Casey Anthony yea, just because you carried your child for 9 months does not make you the best parent.





luv2wahm
by on Aug. 12, 2009 at 1:20 AM

Oh and I don't think it's fair at all!

family in the van

Who I am as a mom can not be expressed in a paragraph. It is expressed by who my children will become.

Jennifer63080
by Platinum Member on Aug. 12, 2009 at 1:21 AM

I agree. and i dont know about my state, but i know the county we used to live in was pathetic.....my dh has 4 kids with his ex wife, and she has full custody now, she abandoned them for almost a year , and dh had them, and she came back and saw that he had a new girlfriend so she went ballistic and called cps a bazillion times say ing i was beating her kids! when they were going through the divorce she was on meth HARD, the kids found needles in the house....and she failed a drug test. and she had a ton of men in and out of her house......it was so sad to sit  by and watch and not be able to do anything for those kids........so we give up

Quoting SnoBuny:

No it is not fair! I firmly believe that men do not have enough rights to their children from before they are born even!

Men are often at the mercy of the mother! It is scary really!



2boys_1girl
by on Aug. 12, 2009 at 1:21 AM

Personally, I don't necessariy like the "every other weekend" visitation with young children...

instead, I think the father should get the kids 3 evenings a week.....

I think it just provides for more stability for little kids... they need a solid home and overnights can be a little too much for kids under 4.

Now moving on, in my state the standard is mother gets custody, father gets every other weekend... and every other Wednesday (alternating)

This schedule in my opinion, doesn't really promote a relationship between father and kids... it needs to be more consistent as well.

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