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Teenage pregnancy (young mom spin off)

Posted by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 10:38 AM
  • 29 Replies

One thing that burns me is when "parents" kick their daughter out of the house or call them whores or when the parents make their daughter feel like they can't even confide in them when they end up pregnant.  Now I am not saying that I condone or encourage teenage unwed pregnancy.  But after she is already pregnant, what is the point in making an already upset daughter feel like a piece of shit?  She's pregnant, it happened, move on and deal with it. This goes for teenage fathers as well.  If my son ever comes home and tells me that he and his girlfriend (as teenagers) are expecting, u bet I'll be pissed, and upset.  But he will also know he can ask me for anything and talk to me about anything.  I believe it takes a FAMILY (not a village) to raise a child.  Thats is what we are, and don't families provide love, support and encouragement??  Please post ur thoughts and feelings.  I am very curious to know how everyone feels on this topic.  (and be nice to each other)

and one more thing..... I believe parents should not push abortion on their teens.  IMO abortion is wrong.  But to each their own.  Adoption is a much better alternative to abortion.  There are plenty of ppl out there that can provide a wonderful life for a baby who can't have one of their own.

CafeMom TickersCafeMom Tickers
by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 10:38 AM
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by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 10:44 AM

I would support my daughter ( and son if he got someone preggo) no matter what. I woulnt be happy about it, but I would rather her feel like she can come to me and have my support instead of hiding it and then having my grandchild become a baby that just gets thrown in a dumpster. 

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by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 10:46 AM

I was 16 when I got pregnant. My parents were upset, but very supportive. They never pushed anything on my, but let me make my own decisions. The only thing they stressed was finishing high school and going to college. Which I did and now I'm going to college.

I don't my kids to become parents before they are ready. But if it happens I will be very supportive, just like my family.

Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie
by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 10:48 AM

 I remember when I was a junior in high school.. I was 17, and miscarried. I told my mom that I was pregnant, and well I lost the baby the day after, but anyway. When I lost the baby she told me that I'm just a slut that opens my legs to any guy that tells me that they love me. Yeah great huh? I was with my bf for almost 6 months at the time. (He is now my husband) After that my stepdad molested me, and I told my mom and she called me a liar and kicked me out. Not the greatest time of my life, but if my daughter got pregnant I would support her 100%!

by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 10:49 AM

Once I'm done crying (privately) I will be supportive (I hope).  I believe every kid needs a support system.  Every expecting parent needs a support system.  When a kid is expecting, they  need even more support.

"I'm selfish, I'm impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I'm out of control, and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." - Marilyn Monroe

by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 10:51 AM

wow thats harsh!  I sorry that happened momma!  see IMO a good parent would never do that.....  I just don't get it!

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by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 10:52 AM

I think it depends on the teen and their mentality. 

Everybody knows that girl who just keeps "accidentally" getting pregnant, still parties on the weekend and feels entitled enough to not do anything about her situation except let mom & dad continue to help them.  In this type of situation I'd understand kicking the kid out, obviously the love from the family isn't helping the situation - some kids are stupid and need tough love.

If the girl and guy really tried to be adults about the situation, worked their butts off, etc. Then heck yeah the parent should continue to help until te teen feels well enough off to handle it themselves.

 Blame Straight People   prochoice.jpg pro choice image by thekiltedyaksmendefault.jpg leagalize dont pentalize marijuana image by earlsworld70117


by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 10:57 AM

My mom was/is WONDERFUL with it all. And my dad. I was 17 when I started getting sick all the time. My mom knew something was up. She went and got me a few tests and told me to take them, then come out and show her. I did, and the test was positive. We cried together, and we made doctor's appointments together. My dad was mad at first, just disappointed, shocked, and he hated my fiance (boyfriend at the time) for a while lol. They supported me, comforted me. Both my parents went to ultrasounds and doctor appointments. Both there for my son's birth, both cried. They let us still live in their house until we both get out of college and on our feet. They love my son to death, and love us being here. We are always a big help around the house :)

If one of my children ever go through a teen pregnancy, I'll be there just like my mom was and is for me. I'm so thankful for them being there for me. I never expected them to help me out as much as they did and still are. :)

by Gold Member on Aug. 25, 2009 at 10:59 AM

I would hope that I could be supportive and help her make the choices she needed to make for her life.  I would be dissappointed but would love her and support her unconditionally.  When I was pregnant with my oldest (20, married, living in our own place, hubs had a great job) I called my family to tell them I was pregnant and my oldest brother the first thing he said was "oh, really?  are you sure you want to do that?"  Are you serious?  I am not calling to tell you we are trying, it's a done deal dude.  I know he loves her but I know for the rest of my life that his first thought of my daughter was that he wished she weren't here.  I would never put that on anyone.  I went to the Doctor for a pregnancy test when my oldest was a few months old and when they came in with the results she asked me whether I wanted it to be positive or negative.  I told her "please just tell me"  I turned out to be not pregnant but I can't imagine how I would have felt if I had said I wanted it to be negative and turned out I was pregnant.  I would always remember that I told someone I didn't want this baby

by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 11:30 AM

I was 15 when I got pregnant, and 15 when I had my daughter. When I told my mom I might be pregnant, she said well you better not be, your father is going to kill you. She made me a doctors appt. and they confirmed I was pregnant, and she just hugged me and told me I can cry if I want, which then I did and she cried with me. My father wanted me to get an abortion, he didnt push it on me or anything, just told me to consider it. He said he was gonna snip my boyfriends you know what off. haha My mother was supportive in the beginning, then we just got kindaa distant. She was there for the birth though. I was being really bitchy to everyone, my fiance, mother and MIL, i had a completely natural birth, so all i felt every single contraction that came my way. It was about 2 in the morning, I was maybee 16 hours into labor, she told me she was leaving the hospital because I was a bitch and she didnt come here to be bitched at by me. Im like wtf? Im in labor, pain, she know what it feels like. She didnt leave and she was super happy when the baby came. Then she made it seem like a chore coming up to see me, it made me feel bad that she didnt want to be there with me and my daughter. Now its almost been a year since my daughter was born, and she complains aout certain things I do as a parent, and other things I do. I never ask her to babysit because she always complains even though Im not asking her to  babysit so I could go party, I ask her to babysit so I can run to the store or an errand. I dont go out and party, Im with my daughter every minute Im not at work. She is somewhat supportive, but deffinetly not as much as I would like her to be. I dont ask her for anything, because she is always complaining about me and my daughter. Im currently working, and looking for another job so I can save up some money and move out by the time I finish high school. I do appreciate what she has done, and some of the support she has given me though. I am grateful for what she has done, but I resent her for some of the things she does and says to my daughter and I.

by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 11:37 AM

Well, everyone has their own way to deal with these things. THere is no right or wrong way.I think parents that are hard on thir pregnant teens are doing what they feel is right. Trying not to enable them.

But in all honesty, if a child is raised right, this wouldn't happen. If a child is raised with morals and self respect and self control they wouldn't get inthis situation. So these arents who want to be hard asses and kick their kid out are too late.

ramadan mubarak

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