• In the Spotlight:
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Stealing daddy?

Posted by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 11:24 PM
  • 22 Replies

So ex-hubby has this girlfriend who moved to our state to get her master's degree.. when she completes it she wants the two of them to move out of state.

What do you make of this? I find it very selfish and told my ex if I were in her shoes I would never encourage a man to move away from his children, just because I didn't like the place he resided in when I found him. He says her career will not take off where we live and it would be unfair to expect her to stay. He says they need to start a new life together.

Should first family come first? In other words, since he has kids here, is it unreasonable to say that she should accept that his life is here.

Or am I just being overly emotional because this will effect my kids?

by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 11:24 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
ahsongbird
by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 11:26 PM

My hubby wanted to move to Italy but I told him no b/c he has kids here that need him and he cant just take off like hes a damned bachelor and forget his kids.

LuvmySFSGT
by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 11:26 PM

You are directing your anger at the wrong person...which is only going to come off as jealousy and bitterness...if he goes be upset with HIM. He is an able bodied adult...he cant be stolen if he goes out of free will.

mamaleah17
by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 11:28 PM

I don't think you are being overly emotional. This would affect your kids very much so. I think he should put his kids before his girlfriend and really think this decision through.

CSRodriguez
by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 11:28 PM

Well I  want to be nice    there is no more" Family"  saddly. It is kids   and yes his kids should come first .He  is an ass if he chooses a woman over his kids , but many do and many women let them     

2boys_1girl
by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 11:30 PM


Quoting LuvmySFSGT:

You are directing your anger at the wrong person...which is only going to come off as jealousy and bitterness...if he goes be upset with HIM. He is an able bodied adult...he cant be stolen if he goes out of free will.


Oh I am appaled at his reasoning. I am just amazed that any woman would think this way. I am not angry at her... what she does is none of my business.. but what he does is. Yes, we are not married anymore so I have no say, but because it effects my kids, it does concern me...

Don't know if that made much sense.

Joylynn77
by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 11:30 PM

I think I saw this on Reba...


2boys_1girl
by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 11:31 PM


Quoting CSRodriguez:

Well I  want to be nice    there is no more" Family"  saddly. It is kids   and yes his kids should come first .He  is an ass if he chooses a woman over his kids , but many do and many women let them     


Well his kids are his family. That is what I was implying. Of course he and I are no longer family, so my only concern is the well being of our kids...

SahmMommYof2
by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 11:35 PM


Quoting 2boys_1girl:

 

Quoting LuvmySFSGT:

You are directing your anger at the wrong person...which is only going to come off as jealousy and bitterness...if he goes be upset with HIM. He is an able bodied adult...he cant be stolen if he goes out of free will.


Oh I am appaled at his reasoning. I am just amazed that any woman would think this way. I am not angry at her... what she does is none of my business.. but what he does is. Yes, we are not married anymore so I have no say, but because it effects my kids, it does concern me...

Don't know if that made much sense.

He is your ex, you have NO say in where he lives. It's not fair to her to have to live somewhere that she has no chance of a career just bc the person she is with has kids there. If he wanted to be there for his kids, he'll find a way back to them when it's "his time". You can't dictate how he lives his life just bc you have children together.

cherryici
by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 11:36 PM

I dont think he should go. Just because you have a new relationship doesnt mean you just move on with your life.  If you have kids you are still responsible for them until they mature. lots of people dont weight their options properly when making the decision to get married or divorced. just cause he doesnt want to be with mommy any more doesnt make it ok to be a long distance daddy. i think he is being selfish and vindictive. He knows that this will not only hurt the kids it will also hurt mommy who has to stay behind and deal with the fallout. very selfish.

Luna091306
by on Aug. 25, 2009 at 11:41 PM

I agree. Should she give up her career because HE has kids where he is now?

People move all the time and still make a relationship work with the kids. If he chooses not to that is HIS fault, not hers.

Quoting LuvmySFSGT:

You are directing your anger at the wrong person...which is only going to come off as jealousy and bitterness...if he goes be upset with HIM. He is an able bodied adult...he cant be stolen if he goes out of free will.



"Religion is dangerous because it allows human beings, who don't have all the answers, to think they do."

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)