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Nervous about being a new mommy =[

Posted by on Sep. 7, 2009 at 3:53 PM
  • 18 Replies

It seriously only seems like yesterday I found out I was pregnant....Now im in my 3rd trimester and so so scared. I'm only 18 yrs old. I'm lucky to still be with the guy who got me pregnant...And I do love him...so so much. But neither of us is ready for this....Especially financially.  I mean...Parenting books' only go so far......What do I do?? I can't rely on my family....And this was a unplanned pregnancy.....I'm not saying I don't want him....I love my baby.....but im only 18.......=[ with, pretty much, nothing....expect love for my baby pregnant belly

by on Sep. 7, 2009 at 3:53 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MarineWifey0708
by on Sep. 7, 2009 at 3:55 PM

you just have to take it one day at a time. yeah you guys may be broke for awhileor whaty not but just make sure you give the baby all you can. make sure you buy things that are needed not things that you want. just make sure you do things that needto  be  done first...know what i mean

cmb121906
by on Sep. 7, 2009 at 3:56 PM

Just try and always remember when it comes to being a mom, you will always find a way. Where do you live? I have some stuff.

 




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doulala
by on Sep. 7, 2009 at 3:57 PM

The financial issue will work itself out, but now you need a lot of help.

Are you living together, able to pay your bills?

Do you have help for labor and postpartum?

Is your family supportive?



Birth is not only about making babies. Birth is about making mothers ~ strong, competent, capable mothers who trust themselves and know their inner strength.

~Barbara Katz Rothma


When you change the way you view birth, the way you birth will change. -Mongan


Cisri1974
by on Sep. 7, 2009 at 4:00 PM

Sweetie, I am turning 35 this month and having many of the thoughts you are having.  But you know what?  It will all work out in the end.

I too am lucky to have the man in my life that I have for he has been through this three other times with his daughters.  He'll be there to help guide me as I ask "stupid" questions like how do I put on a diaper or freak out when I hear the baby sniffle.  We spent hours one night on the phone (he is presently deployed) where all I did was ask questions like "what do I do if this happens" or "will I make the right decisions for our child if this happens" and 1,001 other similar questions...all of which told him and I one thing...the fact I took the time to even worry showed I'd be a good mommy because "bad" mothers don't show that any concern for their kids at all.  (By the way, that does NOT include mothers who have had multiple babies and are just more confident in their parenting role than some others because even those mommies that appear so confident harbor worries all the time...I am talking about the truly bad mothers who don't give a crap at all.)  Have you started having the thoughts like me of "Holy crap!  I'm having a baby in [insert number] weeks!  This is REAL!"  Yeah, thought so.  That tends to freak you out a lot, let me tell you.  LOL 

By the way, if you haven't already, you might want to check with your local hospital to see if they offer child care classes.  I haven't been to one yet, but plan on going soon so I can feel a little more confident about what to do on my own.  Those classes are generally free, you just need to find them.  :-)

NoRegrets_09
by on Sep. 7, 2009 at 4:01 PM

as sad as this will sound....I live with my mom, and zach lives with his mom......We live in ohio, and were like 30 minutes aprt.  Theres a shelter I can go that will get me a apartment and job...but idk.....Im scared......I do know this tho....being a parent may get hard....but i know ill love every minute of it.....and cherish it too....im not going to wake up one day and relize i missed out on Xaviers life....i wont let myself be my mom.....=/

sophistcatdfury
by on Sep. 7, 2009 at 4:02 PM


Quoting Cisri1974:

Sweetie, I am turning 35 this month and having many of the thoughts you are having.  But you know what?  It will all work out in the end.

I too am lucky to have the man in my life that I have for he has been through this three other times with his daughters.  He'll be there to help guide me as I ask "stupid" questions like how do I put on a diaper or freak out when I hear the baby sniffle.  We spent hours one night on the phone (he is presently deployed) where all I did was ask questions like "what do I do if this happens" or "will I make the right decisions for our child if this happens" and 1,001 other similar questions...all of which told him and I one thing...the fact I took the time to even worry showed I'd be a good mommy because "bad" mothers don't show that any concern for their kids at all.  (By the way, that does NOT include mothers who have had multiple babies and are just more confident in their parenting role than some others because even those mommies that appear so confident harbor worries all the time...I am talking about the truly bad mothers who don't give a crap at all.)  Have you started having the thoughts like me of "Holy crap!  I'm having a baby in [insert number] weeks!  This is REAL!"  Yeah, thought so.  That tends to freak you out a lot, let me tell you.  LOL 

By the way, if you haven't already, you might want to check with your local hospital to see if they offer child care classes.  I haven't been to one yet, but plan on going soon so I can feel a little more confident about what to do on my own.  Those classes are generally free, you just need to find them.  :-)

awesome advice - so true. and you look amazing for turning 35 this year.

NoRegrets_09
by on Sep. 7, 2009 at 4:02 PM

I went to child care classes...they do help alot =]

doulala
by on Sep. 7, 2009 at 4:05 PM


Quoting NoRegrets_09:

as sad as this will sound....I live with my mom, and zach lives with his mom......We live in ohio, and were like 30 minutes aprt.  Theres a shelter I can go that will get me a apartment and job...but idk.....Im scared......I do know this tho....being a parent may get hard....but i know ill love every minute of it.....and cherish it too....im not going to wake up one day and relize i missed out on Xaviers life....i wont let myself be my mom.....=/

Has he been participating in the pregnancy, going to birth classes and prenatal appoinments?

Who will be there for the delivery?


Birth is not only about making babies. Birth is about making mothers ~ strong, competent, capable mothers who trust themselves and know their inner strength.

~Barbara Katz Rothma


When you change the way you view birth, the way you birth will change. -Mongan


gcstar42
by Shara on Sep. 7, 2009 at 4:08 PM

dont worry mama you can do it. just do what you can to save money. when grocery shopping you can  buy store brands instead of name brands and they are usually just as good. as far as clothing and stuff dont be afraid to go to a second hand store they usually have good clothes for cheap prices. also half the baby furniture that people say you need you dont really need all that bad. instead of a crib you can buy a pack and play which is cheaper and easy to move around. my kids had both and they actually preferred the pack and play to the crib. also they dont need a ton of toys. for babies a couple of little toys that make noise and are good to chew on is all they need and ever when they get older i can tell you they wont play with half the toys you buy but instead can sit for hours in a cardboard box or give them a bowl and spoon and they are all set. and for diapers i use they parents choice (walmart store brand) and they are great and half the price of huggies or pampers. dont worry as long as you love your baby and do whatever you can to take care of him everything will be just fine.

Kellie7708
by on Sep. 7, 2009 at 4:19 PM

Let's not romanticize motherhood period or teen motherhood specifically.  First of all, "things" will not just fall into place--you have to work hard for them.  Money doesn't appear out of nowhere.  Can you hope that kind souls will help you out?  Of course but don't expect it.  You really need a plan OP, of course not everything falls into line with our plans in life but it is better than just winging it, which  I think just shows immaturity IMO.  I have to giggle when you (OP) say that you are sure you will love every moment of it.  Trust me, you will not love every minute of it, it's normal and it doesn't make you a bad mother to feel like you are going to lose it every now and then. In fact I'd have to question your sanity if you loved every moment of it ha ha ha!  You will love your kid but love isn't always enough...it's a start but just get a game plan started momma, seek support from those who you can trust and best of luck!!!!

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