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my story so far

Posted by on Jan. 25, 2009 at 11:44 PM
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my adoption story isnt totally done yet... i am still 34 weeks preg with my daughter that will be placed. but so far my adoption experience has been very positive.

first, i have a 4 yr old son that i am parenting. he has never met his bfather (he's a bit of a dead beat and thats another loooong story) but my son is amazing. i was 21 when i had him and briefly thought about adoption when i found out i was pregnant with him but i was stubborn and selfish and just wanted to keep him. its been difficult but i wouldnt trade it. however, this time around, i know that being selfish is just not an option. i became pregnant by my ex after we had broken up... we were kind of seeing each other again... and were fighting alot and about to split again when i took a pg test before we officially decided it was off. turns out i was preg and we tried things again for 3 weeks. those were the worst 3 weeks for both of us... we were just miserable. finally one of us threw out the word adoption (abortion would never ever be an option for me) and we started to talk about it. it was the first real, not to mention positive, conversation we'd had for a while. so we decided it was absolutly best and decided to look more into it. we went to an agency and talked with a couselor. she talked with us over several appts (most of the seperate so we could get down to the nitty gritty) and after a few months she was thoroughly convinced that my ex and i wouldnt work as a couple and that we were serious about adoption. we finally gave her our list of traits that were important to us and they gave us some profiles to look at. the interesting things was...  they sent us both the same profiles and we didnt talk about them... we both had one particular couple in our top 2's.  this was amazing because my ex and i dont really agree on anything... and this was kind of a sign that it was meant to be. so we met the couple and it went well.

that was in nov. and we've met up with them several times. tamra (the adoptive mother) is quickly becoming one of my best friends. she is only about 3 years older than me and i think that has helped our relationship. she and i have had some very serious talks about adoption, our experiences getting to this point and our views for the future. i feel very confident that they arent just making empty promises about an open future. we all believe that its the best thing for Hannah. she will know just how much shes loved. and she can know that her adoption is something to be proud of not to be ashamed of.

i will keep you guys posted as it happens... and i will probly be needing some support in a few weeks but i feel that this is a good thing and while there will be some pain, it is still the best and out of it there will be so much happiness for so many people.

by on Jan. 25, 2009 at 11:44 PM
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