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Hello...new to group....

Posted by on Jul. 25, 2007 at 5:05 PM
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I wrote this for another group....parents whos children have been taken away from them....but here is a lil bit about me:
Hi, my name is Michelle. I am 40 yrs old, I have 5 children, My oldest two boys, who are now 21, and 18, I lost to the State of Iowa back in 1990. However, my oldest son went to live with his father in San Diego, since he was 5. And my other son was put into fostercare, he was only about 1 1/2 when we got into the system, because of my drug abuse. On his second birthday, I had a visit at the DHS office, and I picked him up and ran with him.A couple weeks later I got caught, and they went straight for termination of my parental rights.The family he was placed with had an older daughter,then about 8-10yrs old, she was a nurse, and I heard he was a writer. My mom, who has been a DHS worker for over 20 years tried to get him, but they said it was too late. They put him with a family that had lot's of money....and they wanted him!I did go to treatment and graduated, but I had 1 relapse. Which now, knowing....a relapse can actually strengthen a recovery. I met my husband, just before I took my son and ran with him, we dated once or twice. But after we got caught, I did 3 months in jail for taking him, and my future hubby wrote to me and told me to be strong, and was very supportive. When I got out of jail, we got married, on Sept. 29, 90. I got pregnant  with Jesse, my oldest, with my hubby, I had Jesse in Feb, 92, and  JJ's(was in fostercare) court hearings went to the Supreme Court Of Iowa. I'd had Jesse for like 4 months, In home workers....that all said I did a wonderful job , and said I should get my son back.....but I lost!!!! I was a fit mom for my son Jesse, and pregnant again, they're 9 1/2 months apart, but not a fit parent to raise JJ(that was his nickname)He was a beautiful baby!!! Anyway...It's been a long ride. I have 3 kids with my husband now, two boys, then finally...my baby girl.I almost lost them too, I started using meth about 8-10 years ago again, and on Oct. 31st, 2003, my home as raided, and my children were taken into fostercare. I went to jail for 3 months, went into a correctional facility for 4 months, and into a live-in treatment center for about 9 months....but I never gave up hope, I got a job with an attorney's office, and they helped me, reading files of other peoples really helped me.I eventually got my 3 youngest back, although the co.atty,tried to appeal the Judges decision, it went to Supreme Ct. & I won!!!!! I worked soooo hard to get them back....I have been clean 3 years on June 12th!!!!! For two years now I have been E-mailing with my oldest son, who lives in San Diego, he went with his dad, his Dad died in Feb., and I got brave and called him...but being's his dad just passed...it was soooo hard, I was so excited to talk to him, but I had to respect and be there for him for his dad. It was emotional....the e-mails were kinda (safe) and,I've been sending him gifts for B-day, X-mas, and lots of just sayin I love you's...His dad kind of kept in touch with my sister every few years, but nobody ever got  to talk to him. He goes to college in San Diego, and says he wants to come visit us soon.It's excitingbut sometimes I feel too needy, I don't hear from him but maybe once twice a month, sometimes more,I want more...but I know I need to let him come at his own pace(RIGHT?) HOW CAN I FIND MY SON JJ? He will be 19 in July. My oldest asked where he was...his dad never told him anything.....He'd like to see him, as would the whole family. Me and my hubby have been together for going on 17 yrs. Any Info would be sooooo much appreciated on how I can find adopted parents names, any records....Help me.... I'm desperate to find him!   Thanx for listening!!!!Michelle

Since this...I have hired a PI to find my son, she did find him, I called a-mom, she at first lied and said it wasn't him, then, said it was, but that he doesn't want anything to do with me yet....his19th B-day was July 10th, I made him an e-card and sent it to his myspace with a nice letter that I wanted to say to him, and gave him all my info, so I left it up to him, if he wants to look at my myspace he can, see pics of all of us...still waiting, his myspace is private, so couldn't even see pics, which a-mom said she'd send me, but lied about that as well....I found him on Facebook just a coupla days ago....so now I got PICS!!!!!! so awesome....if anyone wants to talk, let me know.... I'm very passionate about this subject, and drug abuse, and stuff...I want to help if I can...I am very lucky I was working for several attorneys going through all this with my youngest 3 ...they have helped me soooo mu






ch! Have been an awesome support!

by on Jul. 25, 2007 at 5:05 PM
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