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How long has it been?

Posted by on Dec. 14, 2009 at 10:34 PM
  • 53 Replies

So I am very pregnant...39 wks. I haven't been with anyone the whole time I've known I was pregnant. The dad and I split up when in early May. Yes, it's been that long since I've been with anyone. It drives me nuts. Back in October my ex and I ended up watching a movie in my bed and I asked him to "do it" with me. Not cause I want to be with him or even like him but just because it had been so long. He said no because he said it would bring up emotions and it would mean something... I was like nice. Well a few days ago we got in a fight and for some reason he brought that up and was like "yes, I want to have sex with you".. not sure what that was about. Recently, he had asked me to move in and be his roommate. I'm not sure if all of this relates it really pisses me off that I haven't been with anyone the whole time I've been pregnant. It also pisses me off that I feel like I can't just go out and have a fling with random guys anymore. Even though I hate my ex, a part of me feels like we will end up "hooking up" in the future. I know this is a bad thing, but seriously he is the only guy around and I feel like if I don't end up sleeping with him than I won't get any for a long time. I'm not even sure that this will happen, my ex likes to remind me every time we talk that we can't be together. So I'm not sure he would even do this. It just pisses me off. I am so sexually frustrated and I feel like I'm never going to have sex again. It's hard considering that I oust to be promiscuous and sleep around. I know my life has changed and I can't be that same person but I really hate the fact that I haven't had sex for so long and I'm not even sure when and if it will happen again.

by on Dec. 14, 2009 at 10:34 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Andrewsmom70
by Silver Member on Dec. 14, 2009 at 11:02 PM

I haven't had sex with a partner since not long after I got pregnant (like a few weeks) and my son turned 4 years old at the end of November.

I tried doing the casual sex thing and that's how I ended up pregnant with my son! LOL 

I miss sex but I have too much other stuff going on right now to worry about sex.

Jasons_Mami
by on Dec. 14, 2009 at 11:20 PM

DON'T sleep with ur ex.  Pop that baby out & find a friend with benefits & don't catch feelings for them

lateedaa
by on Dec. 14, 2009 at 11:24 PM

i went 9 months after my ex and i broke up. it was haaard! i ended up getting back with him for a while and then we broke up again. its been 3 months now...and will be a very long time before i get any again.

carletta1980
by on Dec. 14, 2009 at 11:35 PM

 my ex went to jail right when I found out I was pregnant....he got out  about two  months before I had the baby, and had a girlfriend before he got out of jail so I wasn't with anyone either.....I understand your pain. Its was really hard for me because like you he was around at the end when I really needed it. After she was born we slept together once when the baby was 3 months old then I didn't have sex again until 8 months later.....Everybody is different, but for me it was wierd to try to have sex with anyone but him when I was pregnant. Good luck to you and I hope you don't have to wait as long as I ended up doing.

lydia84
by on Dec. 14, 2009 at 11:37 PM


Quoting Jasons_Mami:

DON'T sleep with ur ex.  Pop that baby out & find a friend with benefits & don't catch feelings for them


I know I shouldn't but I just feel like it will be sooo long if I don't. I am still really attracted to him but I don't want to give him that power. I've had friends with benefits and I don't want to sleep with random guys anymore. I had a very sexual relationship with my ex and a part of me would just want to do it once... just to get back in the swing of things.

calgalmeg
by on Dec. 14, 2009 at 11:38 PM

My ex left and I replaced him with a couple great little toys from the Adam & Eve website- and was a lot happier than when I was with him LOL!  

I would NOT do it with the ex or live with him.  If he lives with you and the baby and you move out for any reason the courts treat it as if he has had 50/50 custody and it can affect your custody in the future.  As for the sex with him- what happens if you get pregnant again?  Or if he gets another GF?  If you're getting along most times now don't mess with it- it'll be a lot easier for the three of you if you and pops can keep it friendly in the G rated way.

Lilypie Breastfeeding PicLilypie Breastfeeding Ticker

kelli0585
by on Dec. 14, 2009 at 11:40 PM

*cough*it's been a year and counting *cough*

When I say I'm a single mom, I REALLY AM a single mom!

I've vowed to never get in too deep (in more ways than one) with guys that I don't know that well, anymore.  I owe it to myself and to my son to be verrrrry picky.  I mean REALLLY picky. 

You know what?

I don't even miss it.  Seriously. 

lydia84
by on Dec. 14, 2009 at 11:43 PM


Quoting carletta1980:

 my ex went to jail right when I found out I was pregnant....he got out  about two  months before I had the baby, and had a girlfriend before he got out of jail so I wasn't with anyone either.....I understand your pain. Its was really hard for me because like you he was around at the end when I really needed it. After she was born we slept together once when the baby was 3 months old then I didn't have sex again until 8 months later.....Everybody is different, but for me it was wierd to try to have sex with anyone but him when I was pregnant. Good luck to you and I hope you don't have to wait as long as I ended up doing.

Yeah, it's been like 7 or 8 months for me. This is the longest I've gone without. I haven't been able to sleep with anyone since I found out I was pregnant. It also makes me mad cause I'm not sure when my baby will come and I know that having sex would help! I can't stand when I am in other pregnancy groups and they talk about sex, and not being able to for 6 wks after the baby is born. I'm like wow... you don't even know! 

kelli0585
by on Dec. 14, 2009 at 11:45 PM


Quoting lydia84:


Quoting carletta1980:

 my ex went to jail right when I found out I was pregnant....he got out  about two  months before I had the baby, and had a girlfriend before he got out of jail so I wasn't with anyone either.....I understand your pain. Its was really hard for me because like you he was around at the end when I really needed it. After she was born we slept together once when the baby was 3 months old then I didn't have sex again until 8 months later.....Everybody is different, but for me it was wierd to try to have sex with anyone but him when I was pregnant. Good luck to you and I hope you don't have to wait as long as I ended up doing.

Yeah, it's been like 7 or 8 months for me. This is the longest I've gone without. I haven't been able to sleep with anyone since I found out I was pregnant. It also makes me mad cause I'm not sure when my baby will come and I know that having sex would help! I can't stand when I am in other pregnancy groups and they talk about sex, and not being able to for 6 wks after the baby is born. I'm like wow... you don't even know! 

It's not the sex that brings on contractions that can induce labor. . . it's the orgasm.  The orgasm IS a contraction.

Just sayin'. . .

momoftwins_3
by on Dec. 14, 2009 at 11:46 PM

it's been over a year for me. my ex has asked, even begged for it, lol. it's so not worth it for me there's too much bad blood between us for me.

i'm too busy with my kids to think about having a SO.


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