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Ever thought " I'm a crappy mom "?

Posted by on May. 26, 2010 at 7:05 PM
  • 18 Replies

If you don't wanna share, that's fine. I don't want this to get outta hand so let's just be sympathetic and nice, or pass over the post.

What's that 1 moment where you said to yourself "I'm a shitty mother"?

Mine, just before my DD turned 2 we lived with a 'friend' (not a friend, a horrible friend). DD and I were helping her get groceries outta her car and I was big pregnant with DS. I gave her a bag of bread and grabbed something heavier for myself and started walking inside. She was lagging behind. Well I took it to the kitchen and walked my way back out of the house to the car to grab more. DD met me at the door and has a look on her face (it's been a while, can't remember HOW I knew, but I just knew) and so I asked her what was in her mouth. She opened her mouth and stuck out her tongue, and there was a bright green streak. I FREAKED out. I didn't know, but I just KNEW it was something bad. I marched her over to the friend and said "Hey what do you have in your car that's green? Aurora ate something bright green" and her face froze. Now lemme remind you that my DD has a very rare heart defect. I waited several looong seconds before I yelled "WHAT IS IT?!" and she said "Klonopin, call 911". Well after an ambulance ride, and a lot of charcoal solution she was ok. Her heartrate had revved up to over 140bmp and then suddenly dropped to 60bpm. They did awful things to her but she lived. The 'friend' thinks that her pill case (you know, the kind that has a compartment for each day Mon-Sun) fell outta her purse and my DD opened it and ate the pretty green one. She said they taste sweet and so we never found out how many she ate. I disagree, my DD knew better (because of deadly food allergies) to pick things up and eat them but I guess it coulda happened. I think she just had them laying around her car, she's lazy and dirty like that. I had to call my ex who lived states away and tell him what had happened. I will never forgive myself, that's the first time, and really the only time, where I said to myself "I'm a shitty shitty mom"

by on May. 26, 2010 at 7:05 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by on May. 26, 2010 at 7:14 PM

Wow that would be hard to handle. However everything turned out for the good and you should try to forgive yourself and not dwell on what could have happened.

by on May. 26, 2010 at 7:20 PM

I've thought that in the past when I left my moms and bounced from place to place with DD, but not anymore. I'm not perfect and things happen in life. I've now been on my own for almost 7 years :o)

by on May. 26, 2010 at 8:25 PM

Hmmmm...mine was when my son was about 22 months old. I had just had my daughter about a month earlier. I was up all know how newborns can be.....and I was trying to get ready for work. The kids dad was getting ready to leave for work and I kept telling him to be quiet because I had just got our daughter to sleep. My son came out and wanted some milk....I told him to hold on one second and he started whining.....he was on the verge of starting to cry and I heard my daughter start to cry...I freaked. I got down on my knees and yelled at my son to "Shut Up!" The look on his little face just broke my heart. Even thinking about it now...over two years later, makes me feel like shit. I will never forget that little look! Made me feel soooooooooo bad. Then I had to leave and go to work for 9 hours and that is all I thought about at work.......

by on May. 26, 2010 at 8:33 PM

I think that all the time as I am reminded of it several times per day thanks to my family. 

by Gold Member on May. 26, 2010 at 9:14 PM

when my son got an ear infection and it lead to 103 degree fever, it ended up causing heart damage to him because he was still recovering from kawasaki disease.  i knew when he wasn't acting right that something was wrong and i took him to the doctor but they wouldn't listen so i left.  i should have pressed them harder.  i should have made them do something.  

by on May. 26, 2010 at 9:39 PM

Shitty Moms are not on top of the situation. Shitty MOm finds her kid in convulsions after busting her butt for putting some crap in her mouth.

I do know that terrible feeling though. And heck. You learned. This is a good reminder, though, to a single mom when relying  on others for rides to take that time and clean where a child is going to be traveling in a car.

Safety first!

Glade it all turned out ok. Wow, that is a heart stopper moment you lived to tell about. One of the nightmares for sure. I think you handled it.

Bet you are like living around a hypervigilancy device, though , ever since!

by on May. 26, 2010 at 11:14 PM

 Prolly when I was focusing on moving out to Calgary last year to give my son a family, and then finding out a week before we were supposed to move, that his dad was seeing someone else already.

That made me feel shitty 'cause I felt like I should have known better to believe him.


by on May. 27, 2010 at 12:05 AM

I feel like that alot when i am stressed and freak out on my son for being, well a little boy. Afterwards i look back and think " wow, i feel like an a$$hole!"

by on May. 27, 2010 at 12:11 AM

 I just posted about this. We received a call from paramedics to pick up my 13 y/o who had passed out on the bus huffing compressed air. This is not the first time he's been in trouble with "chemicals". (We found out he was smoking pot some months ago.)

So, to answer your question, yea, I feel like a shitty mom, every effin' day.

by on May. 27, 2010 at 12:18 AM

I feel like that a lot. When my son asks for something and I have to tell him no because I don't have the money. Or when my son gets hurt at school and, because I'm on a bus taking everyone else's kids home, my family has to go pick him up from school.

But then he hugs me and tells me he loves me and I feel 150% better.

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