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I don't know what to do?

Posted by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 10:07 AM
  • 3 Replies

I'm almost 8 months pregnant. At 3 months pregnant my baby daddy went back to his ex, told me to get dressed and we were going to go have dinner and he said he was going to put gas in the truck then called me about an hour later and told me he was getting back with his ex and I needed to move out. Then (Karma is a great thing) he got arrested and went to prison. ( He was on parole/probation for something he did like 8 years ago and did not show up to some meetings so had a warrant) anyway got picked up went back to prison. I moved on got my own place, his ex had always called me saying he didn't love me and didn't want me, just basically bein a real B, and then maybe like a month after he went back she called and told me he called her and told her he made a mistake did not want to be with her, and he loved me and not her. Well months went by and he started sending me letters saying how much he messed up and just loves me and wants us to get married, and and and. I have talked to him probably thirty or forty times, and yes he sounds sincere, and sounds like he made a mistake, and now we will be having this baby in a couple months but i'm just not sure if I want to give him another chance. On one hand I have an eight year old son, my ex did the same exact thing to me when I was a month pregnant with our son, I took him back over and over again just to make it work for our son, and i finally ended it after 8 years, he was not going to change so I figured it was my time to. And he was not there for the pregnancy or birth, so that left me feeling just mad as hell. And I don't want that this time, I want the dad to be there, I want that happy life, and to get married, but I'm worried that it's just going to turn out like the last time. All my friends say don't trust him, but half of them are married and so happy and the other half are single and don't want to be married. So I feel like they don't know where I'm coming from. I want that good life too where the father helps and is there for me, but i don't want to be thinking in the back of my mind that he might be out doing something wrong, or he might get back with his ex, he has two kids with her, so theres no confirmation he wouldn't want to be with her again one day, if nothing but for his kids. I don't know???? He is about to get out, and with him its either we are together or were not, so I don't know what to do??? Any advice????

by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 10:07 AM
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Replies (1-3):
Singlemomks
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 10:19 AM

 Hon - sounds to me like this guy is worthless to you. I know the feeling, I didn't have help either time I was pregnant, and I wanted that happy ever after stuff too. This guy can't make up his mind, and goes back and forth. There doesn't seem to be any trust, so why bother wasting time? He had his chance, he blew it and baby or not, he doesn't sound like the one for you...

The one thing I would hate for you to do is to sell yourself on the happily ever after, and then be miserable because it just isn't there. You can't make anyone be who you want them to be, ya know? Your friends tell you to not trust him, because they love you, not because of their own relationships. They see something that isn't right, and want to have you avoid it, so you are not hurt.

jeepingirrl
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 10:23 AM

I have to agree with singlemom. This guy sounds like nothing but trouble.

MegaMamaTX
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 12:19 PM

Agreed, you're better off without him. Life with him will be more of the same drama an headaches. Your child doesnt deserve a life like that. You can provide better, stable life.

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