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True Love

Posted by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 10:40 AM
  • 13 Replies

I am really bored today ladies so bear with me....

A friend of mine told me not to long ago that I seem like a jaded person. I personally do not think I am but according to him and all his "guy wisdom" I am.

I do not believe in fairy-tale love. I don't even think I believe that it is natural to find a person and spend the rest f your life with them. People's needs and wants change so much how could one person fulfill all that?

I believe you can find someone that you love and respect but someone that you are going to be crazy in love with for the rest of your life? Probably not gonna happen.

Maybe it is just me....maybe I am jaded....I just do not really buy into the whole happily ever after stuff, do you?

by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 10:40 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Singlemomks
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 10:42 AM

 In general - yes, I have seen it happen, and I do think it is possible.

For me personally, I don't see that it is in the cards for me. Sure would be nice though!

haydsmom2007
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 10:46 AM

Yes I believe in it, but I don't think it's for everyone.

jeepingirrl
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 10:49 AM


Quoting Singlemomks:

 In general - yes, I have seen it happen, and I do think it is possible.

For me personally, I don't see that it is in the cards for me. Sure would be nice though!

Maybe that is a better way to say it.

I have seen people who have been married for 50 years.....they obviously love each other but I wonder are they together because they simple could not live without one another or are they together because it is comfortable and convenient? And maybe comfortable and convenient is what true love is after all. Just someone to enjoy the ride with and not someone that gives you butterflies in your stomach every time you see them.

happymommy1105
by Gold Member on Jul. 12, 2010 at 11:20 AM

to be very bluntly honest.

i had to learn to love my boyfriend.

honestly, he is not what i saw myself with.....ever. but he takes care of me.  he takes care of my son.  

i believe that you learn to love what is good for you and you marry the one that takes care of you the best.

my boyfriend takes care of us and is good for us.....so i learned to love him.  

i didn't at first though.  

dunno, if that makes me jaded or not and of course i would never tell my boyfriend any of this cause that would hurt his feelings.

jeepingirrl
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 11:23 AM


Quoting happymommy1105:

to be very bluntly honest.

i had to learn to love my boyfriend.

honestly, he is not what i saw myself with.....ever. but he takes care of me.  he takes care of my son.  

i believe that you learn to love what is good for you and you marry the one that takes care of you the best.

my boyfriend takes care of us and is good for us.....so i learned to love him.  

i didn't at first though.  

dunno, if that makes me jaded or not and of course i would never tell my boyfriend any of this cause that would hurt his feelings.

See....this is the type of love I believe exists. Not the "Oh my God I love him so much...I want to have sex three times a day even though we have been together for 10 years, I simply can not breath without him. everytime I see him I get all tingly inside" type of love, lol

andylee
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 11:24 AM

Ok, I was just having this conversation last night with my guy and totally freaked him out.  The thing is, obviously since I'm going through a divorce I'm may be a little jaded but I think its more than that.  I've actually always thought somewhat along these lines.

I feel that  most relationships run their course.  Having said that, there are proably a few couples out there who really find their soulmate.  My parents are still crazy in love after 39 years of marriage.  But that is the exception.  Just think of all the wedding invites for the summer.  Are all those people gonna have that?  Of course not.  Yet people feel compelled to get married.  I don't think I'd ever be able to get married again.

Singlemomks
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 11:26 AM

 IDK - I have seen couples married for a long time, and they still have butterflies - so I think it is possible to have more than just comfortable and convenient. I do think that long term relationships have ups and downs, it's not sizzling hot all the time, but overall it is, if that makes sense.

As I get older, the more I am not looking for the sizzling hot, I am looking for someone to go through life with, no matter what happens. It's more about security and that comfortable and cozy. To me, that is what makes it hot, is that comfort level and knowing he is in it for the long haul.

Not that I plan on finding this, just sounds good lol!

andylee
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 11:29 AM


Quoting jeepingirrl:

 

Quoting happymommy1105:

to be very bluntly honest.

i had to learn to love my boyfriend.

honestly, he is not what i saw myself with.....ever. but he takes care of me.  he takes care of my son.  

i believe that you learn to love what is good for you and you marry the one that takes care of you the best.

my boyfriend takes care of us and is good for us.....so i learned to love him.  

i didn't at first though.  

dunno, if that makes me jaded or not and of course i would never tell my boyfriend any of this cause that would hurt his feelings.

See....this is the type of love I believe exists. Not the "Oh my God I love him so much...I want to have sex three times a day even though we have been together for 10 years, I simply can not breath without him. everytime I see him I get all tingly inside" type of love, lol

YES!!! But the thing is, at this point in my life I have trouble convincing myself that it'd make sense to stay with someone if I didn't wanna jump them 3 times a day.  Its not that I need or even want sex like that for the next 10 years but if that goes away, I couldn't help but feel horribly disappointed.

NananRaysmom
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 11:35 AM

I agree with someone else said...I think it happens...Its just not for me.  I dont see my life with a man I am madly in love with.  My kids dad and I have a relationship,,and he is the only one I really see myself with ever...But, we dont live together..and I LOVE it.  I cant be with someone and live with someone.  I am happy alone...with my kids. I like being alone..??  I really dont want to deal with anyone else on a daily basis.



A racist is someone who is winning an argument with a Liberal...


jeepingirrl
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 11:35 AM


Quoting andylee:

Ok, I was just having this conversation last night with my guy and totally freaked him out.  The thing is, obviously since I'm going through a divorce I'm may be a little jaded but I think its more than that.  I've actually always thought somewhat along these lines.

I feel that  most relationships run their course.  Having said that, there are proably a few couples out there who really find their soulmate.  My parents are still crazy in love after 39 years of marriage.  But that is the exception.  Just think of all the wedding invites for the summer.  Are all those people gonna have that?  Of course not.  Yet people feel compelled to get married.  I don't think I'd ever be able to get married again.

This is how I feel also. It is all great but when the newness wears off it's like people just do not want to put up wuth each others shit after that, lol

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