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How *Updated pic*

Posted by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 3:48 PM
  • 5 Replies

me july 4 2008

how do i come out of my shell. I am dating a guy that i have been friends with for 10 plus years and we did date when we was younger but i never slept with him. Well i have been with him and we had sex a couple of times but i dont rememeber how to be exciting with it. I was married for almost 3 years and with him for 4 years but quit having sex at the end of my last pregnancy which was feb of 09 so i was scared with my new bf i used to do it anywhere but now it is in the dark with my shirt on and the lights off i dont want to be boring plus we only have sex with him on top i need help with new ways to do it

by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 3:48 PM
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Footnotes85
by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 3:57 PM

Even with the lights off you can still get wild. I guess just start with changing up the position if nothing else. Otherwise, have the talk. Figure out what you two like, don't like.. Hell you could make a game of it. Write out different things on pieces of paper and draw them out of a hat. Role playing, bondage, flavored items, etc. Just have fun :D

nerdymom28
by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 3:58 PM

 This might not be something you want to do - but watch a couple of pornos for ideas! Maybe even asking him if he wants to watch one with you, and while you're watching it say something like "Oh, could we try that?"  Let him know that you are self conscious and you want to please him - maybe he will be open enough to tell you what he likes.  It can be scary being with a new guy, but the more open you are the better off you'll be.  Good luck!!

lextjmom0709
by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 4:05 PM

he knows that i am self conscious and he is willing to do anything that i will try wedo watch porn but that is us i think it is cool to watch with him. He tells me how beauitful i am and sexy but after 2 kids i dont see it

nerdymom28
by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 4:14 PM

 

Quoting lextjmom0709:

he knows that i am self conscious and he is willing to do anything that i will try wedo watch porn but that is us i think it is cool to watch with him. He tells me how beauitful i am and sexy but after 2 kids i dont see it

I have the same problem.  I have only one daughter, but I have gained about 50 lbs since I had her. (And I've successfully lost 20 of those pounds - but still feel self conscious.)  For the longest time I was so insecure about the way my body looks, that I wouldn't wear the lingerie and sexy costumes my SO likes so much.  I told him that I didn't feel comfortable in them, and he told me that he "hates skinny chicks anyway" and that my body type is perfect for him.  It made me feel a lot better!  I have since stopped being so self conscious - I may not like my body but he does.  And now I feel there's no reason to cover up - because he wants to see me in all my glory.  lol I really hope you can figure it all out - building self confidence takes a lot of time and effort, but I really think you can do it!

lextjmom0709
by on Sep. 28, 2010 at 7:05 PM

i hope so my ex husband would tell me how fat and ugly i was days after having our last child and i feel that way some times but my new bf loves my body the way it is. i need to figure out how to let my past go and the bad thoughts my ex husband had against my body and learn that they are two different people and wont treat me the same

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