Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Single Moms Single Moms

Anybody tired of being a single mom?

Posted by   + Show Post

I need to know how do you cope with being a single mom? I will be basically be a single mom within a few weeks. Sometimes it doesn't bother me but sometimes it does...I didn't make this baby by myself but my child's father is just a mean, spiteful and cold-hearted person. I love my daughter and will die trying to give her the world. But it just gets so lonely sometimes. I know that I'm a good person and deserve happiness. But sometimes I honestly feel like I messed up in life or that I'm being punished by the child's father because he left.

And I just for once would like to know what real love looks and feels like. My father committed suicide when I was 8 months old so I NEVER knew him. Now my mom is beginning to go through a divorce because my step dad just didn't do...ANYTHING!!

I know some of you are probably thinking why would you put yourself in the predicament but come on no one can ever tell how someone will be. People change and their true colors come out.

I mean my mom is a strong person and she says that she is happy to be getting a divorce. She says she feels free and not burdened or held down by his lazy ways of doing..NOTHING. She says she will get married again because she believes in Love.  My mom has gone 18 years of being a parent. But I have a long way to go and I don't know how I can get over being a single mom.

I graduate this semester in May but sometimes I feel like its all for nothing because I got pregnant. I was always focused in school. I was on the Dean's List, received a FULL tuition scholarship, Honor Roll all through grade school. Although please don't get me wrong, I will try my hardest to keep up my grades and find and land a great job. But sometimes it just gets so lonely. I just feel like how did I get my smart educated self into a situation like this? Can anybody relate?

by on Mar. 15, 2011 at 9:12 PM
Replies (21-30):
camommy08
by on Mar. 26, 2011 at 2:17 PM

yes its tiring and lonely i keep telling myself it going to get better. i finally got a job one of these days im going to the local jc to see if in the fall or some other semster they will have the program im looking for and if not go to kaplan (cring those school are so expensive). I have lil desire to date. I dont want men coming and going into my dd life. If my ex truely marries his gf Idk what I do there no way she calling another women mom! Im here mom!

I keep my fingers crossed it will get better. I was very lucky that my parents have been very helpful. We had a ton of disagreement and the stress of being 25 with a kid and still living at home is tought. I jsut have to hope it will get better I get the house ive always dreamed of (or close to it). I kno I wont have a so. ALl I want is my s, ya bad i know

vamom08
by on Mar. 26, 2011 at 2:58 PM
Girl, I understand everything you're going threw I found out I was pregnant at 18 had my daughter at 19 I'm 21 now. I have raise my daughter two years by myself it does get hard but I have a lot of support you can do it I just had finish high school and was planning to go to college when I found out I didn't know how I was go manage I didn't have no car,no job,no place he lives in ST.LOUIS and I live In Va. He told me he was go be their its heartbreaking I thought he was Mr.right but he was wrong he told me my daughter was his first child and after she was born he told me he had three children. I don't like being a single mom but I have to do what I have to do I will get rewarded in the long run I had dreams that was put on hold but I'm making it. I have to live on public assistance I'm fed up with that so I'm ready to get me a job I hate when people say you leaving off my taxes I'm living my daughter is happy I'm bless I have a wonderful mom who helps me trust me " YOU CAN DO BAD BY YOURSELF".
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
single_and_preg
by on Mar. 26, 2011 at 3:09 PM


Quoting VRocsMommy:

I am so tired of it, too. It fucking sucks. I am always exhausted. I just keep telling myself that as they get older it will get easier....I hope.....

Thats how i feel

mytrueloveS
by on Mar. 26, 2011 at 3:10 PM
At first i was lonely. Then i started dating, by the 5th date i realized im better off alone. As long as i get sex when i want it, i dont care for relationships.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
crimsonangel180
by on Mar. 26, 2011 at 4:03 PM
I agree with most the posts here. I like not having to deal with different parenting styles or even what our plans are etc. If you have help use it. Also I know my kids lives are so much better without dad making decisions. You will do fine. Congrats on the baby. As a single mom of 2 year old twins the hard days are worth it. We seperated 2days after they got released from hospital so I've always been a single mom
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
JanaeMarie
by on Mar. 26, 2011 at 6:06 PM

Girl that is crazy! I am glad you are staying strong though. My ex told me he had no kids because his ex girlfriend allegedly "aborted" the kid and he gave me all this crap about how he always wanted kids. So after me and him had made a trip to Planned Parenthood for a pregnancy test. I believed he would have been thrilled that my test came back positive. We leave PP and go somewhere and talk and he says, "I have something to tell you. I'm going to be a father of two!" I'm like what! Who else have you been sleeping with. Come to find out his ex NEVER aborted the kid, she took him to court and he claim that's how he found it. Talk about pissed as hell! He told me that since he didnt like the mother he wasn't going to be  a part of his son's life. Now I don't believe he will be there for mine although he claims he wants to be there for his daughter, but IDK. Supposedly, he's getting married in October?! Whatever! Anyway, I so totally agree with you, You can do bad by yourself!!!!!   I could write a book on all the drama that man has put me through!

Quoting vamom08:

Girl, I understand everything you're going threw I found out I was pregnant at 18 had my daughter at 19 I'm 21 now. I have raise my daughter two years by myself it does get hard but I have a lot of support you can do it I just had finish high school and was planning to go to college when I found out I didn't know how I was go manage I didn't have no car,no job,no place he lives in ST.LOUIS and I live In Va. He told me he was go be their its heartbreaking I thought he was Mr.right but he was wrong he told me my daughter was his first child and after she was born he told me he had three children. I don't like being a single mom but I have to do what I have to do I will get rewarded in the long run I had dreams that was put on hold but I'm making it. I have to live on public assistance I'm fed up with that so I'm ready to get me a job I hate when people say you leaving off my taxes I'm living my daughter is happy I'm bless I have a wonderful mom who helps me trust me " YOU CAN DO BAD BY YOURSELF".


DDDaysh
by Silver Member on Mar. 27, 2011 at 10:12 PM

I know how you feel.  I was the girl who did ALL the right things, I wasn't the one that was supposed to end up as the single mom!  

I was smart, graduated from college early, believed in waiting for marriage before I had sex, never really went out partying or drinking, and believe that divorce is something that should ONLY happen if the children are being abused.  

Then I met my ex.  I let him sweet talk me into getting engaged within a matter of weeks.  I let him convince me that, since we were engaged, it was ok to start trying for a baby.  I let him convince me of so many things, and in the end it didn't matter how comitted I was to marriage and family because a marriage takes two people and he had no commitment at all.  

A few days before I turned 23 I found myself single and newly-unemployed (I was going to stay home with the kids).  I had an 8-month old son and a 3-year-old step-daughter who was about to make a huge whole in my heart when I had to let her go.  It wasn't fair!  

I worked my butt off, substitute teaching until I could find another job.  I took a crappy accounting temp job, and worked my way into full time with benefits.  After a couple of years I started graduate school so that I could find a new job and get promoted.  I spent FOUR YEARS working full time, going to graduate school two nights a week.  

My son's father is useless.  He's never around and only sometimes pays support (when the state tracks him down).  

I'm tired of being a single mom alot.  I'm tired of trying to find a way to balance critical things I need to do with my son (like Dr's appointments) with not totally pissing off my job when I need to miss work at inconvenient times.  I'm tired of being the one who does all the household chores.  Mostly I'm tired of not having another adult around to celebrate with when my son has little bitty accomplishments.  I hate going to soccer games and cub scouts alone.  I hate having to ask strangers to take pictures when there's something I have to do with my son.  It shouldn't have to be that way.  

But I LOVE my kid more than anything in the world.  I wish he had a Dad I could share him with, but I'll take him anyway I can get him.  He's more important than anything else in my life.  He is the greatest gift God ever gave me.  

greatomomme
by on Sep. 20, 2011 at 2:14 AM

It take one day at a time as a single mom for 12 yrs now my daughters 16yrs old and 18 yrs is different. Same time I can feel very lonely and sad, but for most to the time I'm happy with my life. I'm so proud of my kids. I know it can be  very hard to be a single mom..and this is a season of my life.I'a very positive person that  things 'll change same day and I 'll look to this present and 'll be in my past .:) School is great keep in school.I came from south America my first language is Spanish so I had lerng  ESL and  education is the key for a great set example to your kids. I hope I help you you are not alone!!! God bless you!

faleeshab
by on Sep. 20, 2011 at 2:58 AM
I agree with the kids smile. Even in my most tired, edge of my sanity moments, when my son randomly comes up and says "mommy I love you sooooo much" or he does a funny little dance just to make me laugh, or any number of things ur child will do too, it will remind u, that even if it sucks and uve lost your mind, they, he or she make everything you do and feel worth it!!!!!


Quoting LovinLiv:

I'm so tired of it! I've been a single mom for most of my daughter's life and it's not easy! But you cling to your kid's smile when it gets too hard, that's how I get by. She makes it worth it

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
andymom29
by on Sep. 20, 2011 at 6:20 AM
I'm extremely tired of being single.. I'm pregnant now with my 2nd child after 13yrs & I feel the lonliness even more now .. Idk if there is any hope 4 me cause it seems like I will always b alone & being happy 4 everyone else.. But u have so much going 4 u & your love will come ..
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN